Strange Addressing Issue

MissingLI Posted: Mar 24, 2010 01:09 PM

Strange Addressing Issue

I have two friends that I am going to be sending STD's to. They are a lesbian married couple, married as in they had the ceremony on LI but it's not 'legal'. Anyway, they consider themselves married, but they don't have their names changed or anything. So I'm not really sure how to address their invite.

Is it:
Mrs blank P
Mrs blank F

or
Ms blank P
Ms blank F

Any advise? I hate to go to them and ask, but I'm just not sure.

FutureMrsPanuch Posted: Mar 24, 2010 01:12 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

in not really sure the 'right' answer but i would think if they consider themselves married than it would be Mrs.

HTH

MrsVtoBe Posted: Mar 24, 2010 01:14 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Posted by bride2be2010

in not really sure the 'right' answer but i would think if they consider themselves married than it would be Mrs.

HTH

I agree. This is a tough one, I don't know the right answer, but I would say Mrs.

mybabylovesmoi Posted: Mar 24, 2010 01:17 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I would also use Mrs. Since they had a ceremony and everything, I'm sure they would appreciate being addressed as a mrs. by their friends even if the law doesn't recognize it.

jenn_eric Posted: Mar 24, 2010 01:21 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Not sure what the 'proper' way is, but I would say Mrs. as well. Since they consider themselves married they would be Mrs, and the post office doesn't care about legal names/titles.

Moonmist09 Posted: Mar 24, 2010 01:52 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

if you really want to be on the super safe side, i would say go with the 'Ms.' Ms is appropriately used for both single and married ladies alike...

FutureJOC Posted: Mar 24, 2010 02:05 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I would say use Mrs. Honestly it's playing it safe and you can't say they'd be offended if you used Mrs. because at least it shows you're recognizing them as a married couple.

leesah85 Posted: Mar 24, 2010 02:06 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I would go with Mrs. - they might be offended if you use 'Ms.' b/c that implies divorced or single IMO.

Write:
Mrs. Elizabeth Smith & Mrs. Jennifer Jones

Just like you would for a couple where the wife didn't take the man's last name.

futurestevens Posted: Mar 24, 2010 02:10 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Posted by leesah85

I would go with Mrs. - they might be offended if you use 'Ms.' b/c that implies divorced or single IMO.

Write:
Mrs. Elizabeth Smith & Mrs. Jennifer Jones

Just like you would for a couple where the wife didn't take the man's last name.

i second that.

DWKSwed Posted: Mar 24, 2010 02:57 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I have the same issue, and I am addressing them Mrs. & Mrs., one name on top of the other.

MissingLI Posted: Mar 24, 2010 03:00 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Posted by futurestevens

Posted by leesah85

I would go with Mrs. - they might be offended if you use 'Ms.' b/c that implies divorced or single IMO.

Write:
Mrs. Elizabeth Smith & Mrs. Jennifer Jones

Just like you would for a couple where the wife didn't take the man's last name.

i second that.

This is what I was thinking, but wasn't totally sure. Thanks so much ladies!!

FutureMrsDe Posted: Mar 24, 2010 03:15 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

My FSIL had this problem and so will i . She sent me her addresses and has Ms. and Ms.

Jna2010 Posted: Mar 24, 2010 03:20 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Posted by bride2be2010

in not really sure the 'right' answer but i would think if they consider themselves married than it would be Mrs.

HTH

i agree

kshea23 Posted: Mar 24, 2010 03:57 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I had the same issue for my FH cousin and her fiancee. They will be married by the time I send out my invitations, so I asked them how they would like me to address it.

They said The (last name)-(last name) family.

They're not hyphenating their names though, but it is politically correct according to them

HTH

JLWSJC Posted: Mar 24, 2010 03:57 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I would go with Mrs. cause even if it's wrong, I don't think they'd be offended.

However, I was always taught 'Ms.' was ambiguous for Miss or Mrs.... not that it was indiciative of single-ness? Am I wrong? Like, that it was created because men don't have a title that indicates their marital status, it's always Mr. so women wanted one that didn't either... and it's not an abbv for Miss.

Ang9483 Posted: Mar 24, 2010 04:17 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

I would use Mrs.

allornil Posted: Mar 24, 2010 04:18 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Id ask. I know that seems odd but are you close w them? If you are, I;d just say, I'm addressing this invitation and I want to know if I should write Mrs.

justnicethings Posted: Mar 24, 2010 05:01 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Let me ask my friend!!!!

MissingLI Posted: Mar 24, 2010 05:16 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Posted by kshea23

I had the same issue for my FH cousin and her fiancee. They will be married by the time I send out my invitations, so I asked them how they would like me to address it.

They said The (last name)-(last name) family.

They're not hyphenating their names though, but it is politically correct according to them

HTH

Never thought of this! This may be the best way to go about it. Thanks!

kshea23 Posted: Mar 24, 2010 05:17 PM

Re: Strange Addressing Issue

Posted by MissingLI

Posted by kshea23

I had the same issue for my FH cousin and her fiancee. They will be married by the time I send out my invitations, so I asked them how they would like me to address it.

They said The (last name)-(last name) family.

They're not hyphenating their names though, but it is politically correct according to them

HTH

Never thought of this! This may be the best way to go about it. Thanks!

no problem chickie!!