Stupid question - Unity Candle

chicky724 Posted: May 18, 2009 09:11 PM

Stupid question - Unity Candle

I'm getting married in a Catholic church, but we're just having a ceremony, not the full mass.

Is lighting the unity candle a part of the actual ceremony, or is it something that's optional?

It doesn't really matter to me either way, I was just trying to avoid having to buy/make something else.

Ivansgirl Posted: May 18, 2009 09:14 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

It is up to you. We are also have a ceremony and not a mass. Our deacon said we could do it or not. that is was a personal preference.

asg450 Posted: May 18, 2009 09:16 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

I don't think it's absolutely necessary for you to do the unity candle tradition. It's just something to symbolize you and FH coming together and the families joining.

lolalovesacroat Posted: May 18, 2009 09:18 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Iam not sure but i think it is part of the cermony bc I always remember the two become one in the fire. I read a girl got her unity candle at party city for 2.99. I got mine for 9.99 bc I know I will never display it at home.

Eweluska17 Posted: May 18, 2009 09:22 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Posted by lolalovesacroat

Iam not sure but i think it is part of the cermony bc I always remember the two become one in the fire. I read a girl got her unity candle at party city for 2.99. I got mine for 9.99 bc I know I will never display it at home.

I agree I will get one from party city

springsandra Posted: May 18, 2009 10:40 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Yeah mine was $2 (not $2.99) from Party City! I hope you can find a nice one on clearance like mine!

We're not even having a Christian ceremony but FH wanted to do the unity candle because he thought it seemed sweet and a part of the ceremony he would enjoy, even in a non-religious way.

jlt2010 Posted: May 18, 2009 11:02 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

just fyi, i was at a wedding this past saturday and the church didn't allow them to do the unity candle. i'd make sure with your parish admin if they allow it. i just always assumed that it was allowed.

MrsCM Posted: May 19, 2009 10:59 AM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Interesting, we're having a Catholic ceremony by a Bishop and he said we have to to a candle.

MrsBlueRibbon Posted: May 19, 2009 11:01 AM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Our priest told us it is not part of the Catholic ceremony and they discourage the use of unity candles, but would not stop us.

futureMrsJSL Posted: May 19, 2009 11:04 AM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Posted by chicky724

I'm getting married in a Catholic church, but we're just having a ceremony, not the full mass.

Is lighting the unity candle a part of the actual ceremony, or is it something that's optional?

It doesn't really matter to me either way, I was just trying to avoid having to buy/make something else.

So glad you asked this question. I was wondering the same thing.

luckiestelc Posted: May 19, 2009 11:16 AM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

Betty really pushed the Unity Candle on us, although she said Father Peter didn't care either way.

i bought an 'irish' candle (with a claddagh and an irish poem), and 2 99 cent tapers.

i felt the same way as you did, kind of didn't want to bother with it. but betty talked on and on for about 20 minutes about how she still lights her unity candle every anniversary and how, besides the rings, it's the only thing that you can take away from your ceremony....

FutureMrsG Posted: May 19, 2009 02:41 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

The unity candle is NOT actually part of the catholic wedding ceremony but many churches will allow it to be included.

MrsCM Posted: May 19, 2009 02:46 PM

Re: Stupid question - Unity Candle

This thread is really bothering me because we did NOT want one and we were being forced to use one and now I'm finding out that with Catholic ceremonies you don't need one? (Now that I made a gorgeous one?!) Although I do remember there being something lit in weddings when I was an altar server as a kid. I need to call, because we don't want to do it and would sooner put the candle on the table with the guest book (plates)

I mean not only are we using a priest but he's a bishop for heaven's sakes he should know what he's talking about!