SWR: What should I do??? (Sorry, kinda long)

I have this 'friend' that I've really lost touch with over the past few years. We were friends through HS and College and through the years we just drifted apart. She really became a different person and we really have nothing in common anymore. She was married last year and I was sooo happy for her.. went the extra mile to let her know how happy I was for her... helped with her shower, bach, etc. even though I was not a BM.

Fast forward to my shower this past Sunday...
She came and looked COMPLETELY MISERABLE the entire time! She was sitting at the same table as most of my friends and I heard (from more than one person) that she was talking sh!t, comparing my shower to hers, kept bringing up her wedding and even rolled her eyes on several occasions.

I don't know what to do...
If she's going to be a miserable biotch at my wedding... I DONT WANT HER THERE! She is just a toxic friend that I really don't need in my life. Invites are already out though. If they weren't, I'd rip hers up and say F it. Now I'm at a loss... Should I call her and give her a piece of mind?? Or wait until after my wedding and never speak to her again?? Ughhh!

Wait until after the wedding and just never speak with her again.

You won't even notice her at the wedding...no worries...just drift apart after the big day.. you don't need the drama of a confrontation now...

good luck

WOW!! Did your friend go to the same school mine did?? I had almost the same exact thing happen to me. My friend moved away years ago and we drifted apart. She kept saying how she wanted to come see me get married and I sent her the invite.

Well......she skipped my church and showed up at my reception with this girl that she claimed was her cousin...turned out to be her latest Ex's Baby's Mama ((((traaaaaash)))))) which she brought there to make him jealous. She disrespected all of my friends the entire time and literally called up my Best Friend's ex-girlfriend IN FRONT OF HIS WIFE and put him on the phone with her. To top it off, she didn't even so much as give us a card and talked so much **** about my wedding.

Do yourself a favor and write her off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish someone told me to do this before my wedding. Now this @sshole is in all of my pics and video....it makes me furious every time I see her.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make this about me at all, just showing u what happened so you can learn from it.

Good Luck! LEt us know what you decide!

EDIT FOR TYPOS BC IM SO MAD TYPING LOL!! sorry!

Honestly, there isn't much you can do at this point. You can't uninvite her, even if you really want to.

Did she just get married recently? Some girls go through a bit of the post-wedding blues after their wedding ... and have a feeling of missing their wedding. She may have just been thinking of her own shower at the time, but her comments came out the wrong way.

There will be so many other people at your wedding, and you will be so busy enjoying yourself and celebrating that you married the love of your life, that you probably won't even notice her presence that day.

If you really feel like she's a toxic friend, then cut ties with her after the wedding.

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Posted by anamaree77

WOW!! Did your friend go to the same school mine did?? I had almost the same exact thing happen to my. My friend moved away years ago and we drifted apart. She kept saying how she wanted to come see me get married and I sent her the invite.

Well......she skipped my church and showed up at my reception with this girl that she claimed was her cousin...turned out to be her latest Ex's Baby's Mama ((((traaaaaash)))))) which she brought there to make him jealous. She disrespected all of my friends the entire time and literally called up my Best Friend's ex-girlfriend IN FRONT OF HIS WIFE and put him on the phone with her. To top it off, she didn't even so much as give us a card and talked so much **** about my wedding.

Do yourself a favor and write her off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish someone told me to do this before my wedding. Now this @sshole is in all of my pics and video....it mades me furious every time I see her.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make this about me at all, just showing u what happened so you can learn from it.

Good Luck! LEt us know what you decide!

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WOW! The nerve of some people! What the he!! happened to genuine people who could actually be truly happy for their 'friends'?? It's just so sad... Sorry you had to deal with that bs, but you are NOT alone! I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do. I couldn't ever bring myself to uninvite her (bc I'm not that much of an a-hole), but I really want her to know, that I know what she was saying. Then she could decide whether or not she wants to come.

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Posted by PreshusSmurf

Honestly, there isn't much you can do at this point. You can't uninvite her, even if you really want to.

Did she just get married recently? Some girls go through a bit of the post-wedding blues after their wedding ... and have a feeling of missing their wedding. She may have just been thinking of her own shower at the time, but her comments came out the wrong way.

There will be so many other people at your wedding, and you will be so busy enjoying yourself and celebrating that you married the love of your life, that you probably won't even notice her presence that day.

If you really feel like she's a toxic friend, then cut ties with her after the wedding.

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I hear ya.. I could never uninvite someone but I just want her to know how upset I am by her attitude. She was married in August 07. You're right, maybe she is just upset that all of the attention was on her last year, but that doesn't give her the right to act like an a$$.

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Posted by Maria31

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Posted by anamaree77

WOW!! Did your friend go to the same school mine did?? I had almost the same exact thing happen to my. My friend moved away years ago and we drifted apart. She kept saying how she wanted to come see me get married and I sent her the invite.

Well......she skipped my church and showed up at my reception with this girl that she claimed was her cousin...turned out to be her latest Ex's Baby's Mama ((((traaaaaash)))))) which she brought there to make him jealous. She disrespected all of my friends the entire time and literally called up my Best Friend's ex-girlfriend IN FRONT OF HIS WIFE and put him on the phone with her. To top it off, she didn't even so much as give us a card and talked so much **** about my wedding.

Do yourself a favor and write her off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish someone told me to do this before my wedding. Now this @sshole is in all of my pics and video....it mades me furious every time I see her.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make this about me at all, just showing u what happened so you can learn from it.

Good Luck! LEt us know what you decide!

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WOW! The nerve of some people! What the he!! happened to genuine people who could actually be truly happy for their 'friends'?? It's just so sad... Sorry you had to deal with that bs, but you are NOT alone! I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do. I couldn't ever bring myself to uninvite her (bc I'm not that much of an a-hole), but I really want her to know, that I know what she was saying. Then she could decide whether or not she wants to come.

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I know what you're saying, I probably wouldn't have the heart to un-invite someone either. People just s*u*c*k.

you can't dictate how people should behave. If she is miserable, let her be, it won't affect you or your day unless you let it. Invite her, she is, or at least once was a friend.

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Posted by Maria31

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Posted by PreshusSmurf

Honestly, there isn't much you can do at this point. You can't uninvite her, even if you really want to.

Did she just get married recently? Some girls go through a bit of the post-wedding blues after their wedding ... and have a feeling of missing their wedding. She may have just been thinking of her own shower at the time, but her comments came out the wrong way.

There will be so many other people at your wedding, and you will be so busy enjoying yourself and celebrating that you married the love of your life, that you probably won't even notice her presence that day.

If you really feel like she's a toxic friend, then cut ties with her after the wedding.

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I hear ya.. I could never uninvite someone but I just want her to know how upset I am by her attitude. She was married in August 07. You're right, maybe she is just upset that all of the attention was on her last year, but that doesn't give her the right to act like an a$$.

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I absolutely agree, I wasn't trying to suggest that she has a right to act that way or say anything negative ... only trying to come up with a possible reason for her behavior so you could see that it might not really be about you, just about how she misses her own wedding.

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Posted by PreshusSmurf

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Posted by Maria31

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Posted by PreshusSmurf

Honestly, there isn't much you can do at this point. You can't uninvite her, even if you really want to.

Did she just get married recently? Some girls go through a bit of the post-wedding blues after their wedding ... and have a feeling of missing their wedding. She may have just been thinking of her own shower at the time, but her comments came out the wrong way.

There will be so many other people at your wedding, and you will be so busy enjoying yourself and celebrating that you married the love of your life, that you probably won't even notice her presence that day.

If you really feel like she's a toxic friend, then cut ties with her after the wedding.

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I hear ya.. I could never uninvite someone but I just want her to know how upset I am by her attitude. She was married in August 07. You're right, maybe she is just upset that all of the attention was on her last year, but that doesn't give her the right to act like an a$$.

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I absolutely agree, I wasn't trying to suggest that she has a right to act that way or say anything negative ... only trying to come up with a possible reason for her behavior so you could see that it might not really be about you, just about how she misses her own wedding.

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Thank you!