TGIF!!!! =-) YES!!!!
GOOD MORNING!
How are you?!
How was your week?
Well ITS FRIDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
TOAST!!!
HOPE Ur FRIDAY FLIESSSS !!!!! SO WE CAN enjoy the weekedn!!! =-)
Now, LET'S LAUGH
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When I went to college, my parents threw a going away party for me, according to the letter.
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A guy dies and is sent to Hell. ***** meets him, shows him doors to three rooms, and says he must choose one to spend eternity in. In the first room, people are standing in **** up to their necks. The guy says 'no, let me see the next room.' In the second room, people are standing with **** up to their noses. Guy says no again. Finally, ***** opens the door to the third room. People are standing with **** up to their knees, drinking coffee and eating danish pastries. The guy says, 'I pick this room.' ***** says okay and starts to leave, and the guy wades in and starts pouring some coffee. On the way out ***** yells, 'O.K., coffee break's over. Everyone back on your heads!'
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An old couple is sitting in church one morning, listening to a sermon, when the wife whispers, 'I just let out a silent fart. What should I do?'
Her husband whispers back, 'Well, for starters, you can put a new battery in your hearing aid.'
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A widow goes on her first date since her husband's death, and afterward the two end up back at her place. Once in the bedroom, she takes off everything but her black panties.
'You can touch me anywhere else,' she says, 'but down there I'm still mourning.'
'I figured as much,' says the man. He then proceeds to pull down his pants and put on a black condom. 'If you don't mind, I'd like to offer my deepest condolences.'
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One day in a nursing home, old Mr. Smith goes up to a candy striper and says, 'My penis died.'
Deciding to humor him, the girl says 'Oh, poor baby. I'm sorry to hear that.'
Two days later the girl is making her rounds and sees Mr. Smith wandering the halls with his frank and beans hanging out.
'Mr. Smith!' she cries. 'I thought you said your penis had died!'
'It did. Today's the viewing.'
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A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town, when the girl stopped the boy. 'I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex.' The boy reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.
After a cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. 'Why aren't we going anywhere?' asked the girl.
'Well, I should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a cab driver, and the fare back to town is $25.'
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How are you?!
How was your week?
Well ITS FRIDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
TOAST!!!
HOPE Ur FRIDAY FLIESSSS !!!!! SO WE CAN enjoy the weekedn!!! =-)
Now, LET'S LAUGH
When I went to college, my parents threw a going away party for me, according to the letter.
A guy dies and is sent to Hell. ***** meets him, shows him doors to three rooms, and says he must choose one to spend eternity in. In the first room, people are standing in **** up to their necks. The guy says 'no, let me see the next room.' In the second room, people are standing with **** up to their noses. Guy says no again. Finally, ***** opens the door to the third room. People are standing with **** up to their knees, drinking coffee and eating danish pastries. The guy says, 'I pick this room.' ***** says okay and starts to leave, and the guy wades in and starts pouring some coffee. On the way out ***** yells, 'O.K., coffee break's over. Everyone back on your heads!'
An old couple is sitting in church one morning, listening to a sermon, when the wife whispers, 'I just let out a silent fart. What should I do?'
Her husband whispers back, 'Well, for starters, you can put a new battery in your hearing aid.'
A widow goes on her first date since her husband's death, and afterward the two end up back at her place. Once in the bedroom, she takes off everything but her black panties.
'You can touch me anywhere else,' she says, 'but down there I'm still mourning.'
'I figured as much,' says the man. He then proceeds to pull down his pants and put on a black condom. 'If you don't mind, I'd like to offer my deepest condolences.'
One day in a nursing home, old Mr. Smith goes up to a candy striper and says, 'My penis died.'
Deciding to humor him, the girl says 'Oh, poor baby. I'm sorry to hear that.'
Two days later the girl is making her rounds and sees Mr. Smith wandering the halls with his frank and beans hanging out.
'Mr. Smith!' she cries. 'I thought you said your penis had died!'
'It did. Today's the viewing.'
A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town, when the girl stopped the boy. 'I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex.' The boy reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.
After a cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. 'Why aren't we going anywhere?' asked the girl.
'Well, I should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a cab driver, and the fare back to town is $25.'
