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Thanks yous - no gift
lpatticake Posted: Sep 19, 2013 03:21 PM+
lpatticake MEMBER SINCE: 9/12 TOTAL POSTS : 658 WEDDING DATE: Aug 04, 2013
Posted: Sep 19, 2013 03:21 PM bride-minus.png

Thanks yous - no gift

I've read that you are supposed to send thank you's to everyone who attended the wedding, not just the people who gave a gift. Are you guys doing this and if so, what are you writing in your thank you?

I have a few people who didn't give anything, and I think they honestly just forgot about it. A couple of those people asked for our address when we got back from our honeymoon, which implied they would be sending a card, but never did.

I also have one cousin who didn't give anything but I'm sure she meant to. My mom wanted to approach her, but I was really uncomfortable because its tacky and basically asking for money. But now that I'm sending thank yous, I realize it will still be uncomfortable. I can't not send her one and send to her sister, but I don't know what I could write without sounding awkward.
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aiavaro1 Posted: Sep 19, 2013 03:30 PM+
aiavaro1 MEMBER SINCE: 8/11 TOTAL POSTS : 291 WEDDING DATE: Nov 27, 2013
Posted: Sep 19, 2013 03:30 PM bride-minus.png

Thanks yous - no gift - Long Island Weddings

Yes I would give a thank you card to everyone attending just to be the bigger person. Just thank them for sharing the special day with you. Simply as that.
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sandr325 Posted: Sep 19, 2013 03:32 PM+
sandr325 MEMBER SINCE: 7/12 TOTAL POSTS : 1599 WEDDING DATE: Jun 01, 2013
Posted: Sep 19, 2013 03:32 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Thanks yous - no gift

For my husbands co-worker who did not give a gift and told him numerous times next week I am going to send a generic Thank You card, not the nice wedding TY card with our picture.

I would write something along the lines, Thank You for celebrating our wedding day as we start our lives together. I'm sure you can google some examples.

Also, I hope sending a card reminds people who said they would send a gift and never got around to it.
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Poggi Posted: Sep 19, 2013 04:39 PM+
Poggi MEMBER SINCE: 12/12 TOTAL POSTS : 745 WEDDING DATE: Oct 25, 2013
Posted: Sep 19, 2013 04:39 PM bride-minus.png

Thanks yous - no gift - Long Island Weddings

I think you should still send a card and just say thank you for sharing the day with you.

Getting the card might jog memories for people who didn't bring a gift and have not yet sent one. Isn't there a rule where guests have a year after the wedding to send a gift anyway?
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2013Bride Posted: Sep 20, 2013 01:47 AM+
2013Bride MEMBER SINCE: 11/11 TOTAL POSTS : 3678 WEDDING DATE: May 31, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 01:47 AM bride-minus.png

Re: Thanks yous - no gift

Our only no-gifter was my husband's cousin & her boyfriend, who attended our wedding. I didn't expect them to give anything anyway.... so I did not send them a thank you card. I wasn't wasting my time, a card & a stamp on them....
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Pinkisles Posted: Sep 20, 2013 02:18 PM+
Pinkisles MEMBER SINCE: 1/12 TOTAL POSTS : 1297 WEDDING DATE: Mar 15, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 02:18 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Thanks yous - no gift


Posted by Poggi

I think you should still send a card and just say thank you for sharing the day with you.

Getting the card might jog memories for people who didn't bring a gift and have not yet sent one. Isn't there a rule where guests have a year after the wedding to send a gift anyway?



I thought it would jog a few memories too...but nothing. I'm still annoyed that these people didn't give a gift.
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vanillataco Posted: Sep 20, 2013 03:07 PM+
vanillataco MEMBER SINCE: 1/12 TOTAL POSTS : 677 WEDDING DATE: Sep 01, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 03:07 PM bride-minus.png

Thanks yous - no gift - Long Island Weddings

I'm not sending a thank you card to those who didn't get us a gift or card. I think that you should at least write a card to the couple if you cannot afford a gift. I had one friend who did that and it was such a sweet card. Some people can't afford a gift and I understand. But...everyone can afford a card of some sorts
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MrsB92713 Posted: Sep 20, 2013 03:23 PM+
MrsB92713 MEMBER SINCE: 9/12 TOTAL POSTS : 1118 WEDDING DATE: Sep 27, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 03:23 PM bride-minus.png

Thanks yous - no gift - Long Island Weddings

I didn't think someone not bringing a gift was that common...
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lpatticake Posted: Sep 20, 2013 03:42 PM+
lpatticake MEMBER SINCE: 9/12 TOTAL POSTS : 658 WEDDING DATE: Aug 04, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 03:42 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Thanks yous - no gift


Posted by MrsB92713

I didn't think someone not bringing a gift was that common...



Get ready for some surprises when you go through your gifts. I noticed that people's generosity had little to do with their financial ability. When I made a list of the gifts it was all over the place, with people who are broke giving way more than I would expect and people who are well off giving much less than I would've expected. I think I had about 7 or 8 guests (or couples) that didn't give a gift at the wedding, but a few of them did send something later on. I decided before opening any envelopes that I wasn't going to let anyone's gift (or lack thereof) upset me.
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MrsB92713 Posted: Sep 20, 2013 04:49 PM+
MrsB92713 MEMBER SINCE: 9/12 TOTAL POSTS : 1118 WEDDING DATE: Sep 27, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 04:49 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Thanks yous - no gift


Posted by lpatticake


Posted by MrsB92713

I didn't think someone not bringing a gift was that common...



Get ready for some surprises when you go through your gifts. I noticed that people's generosity had little to do with their financial ability. When I made a list of the gifts it was all over the place, with people who are broke giving way more than I would expect and people who are well off giving much less than I would've expected. I think I had about 7 or 8 guests (or couples) that didn't give a gift at the wedding, but a few of them did send something later on. I decided before opening any envelopes that I wasn't going to let anyone's gift (or lack thereof) upset me.



Thanks for the info! I'm glad I know this ahead of time.
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vanillataco Posted: Sep 20, 2013 05:05 PM+
vanillataco MEMBER SINCE: 1/12 TOTAL POSTS : 677 WEDDING DATE: Sep 01, 2013
Posted: Sep 20, 2013 05:05 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Thanks yous - no gift


Posted by MrsB92713

I didn't think someone not bringing a gift was that common...



I think some people don't know that they should bring a gift or at least a card. FH's groomsman and cousin said they didn't know they had to bring a gift. I was really shocked when I heard this because I thought this was standard. That groomsman did end up sending us something but FH's cousin didn't.
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