the miracle of toilet paper (this is so bad)

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small.
Instead of automatically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion:

'If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds.'

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and I stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts.

'How long will this take?' I ask.
They will grow larger over a period of years,' he replies.
I stop. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?'
Without missing a beat he says, 'Worked for your ***, didn't it?'
He's still alive, and with a great deal of physical therapy, he may even walk again.
Stupid, stupid man.