The second wedding gift

Friend of mine is getting married- I gave $300 for the first wedding- and being that we are getting married ourselves, we are kind of tapped- am I expected to give the same amount for his 2nd wedding?

It's difficult to say cause it depends on your relationship with him, his bride, your financial situation, ecc.
IMO you should give what you can especially as you're preparing for your own wedding! Don't feel obliged to give the same amount...I wouldn't give less than half though as that might be taken the wrong way by them...

I hate these 'socializing' problems!!! Trying to figure out what the best thing to do is and what the other person will think! Difficult to get right isn't it???

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Posted by Kara and Todd

It's completely fine to give less than you gave at the first wedding. In this situation, I'd probably give a registry gift instead of cash, anyway.

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That sounds like a good idea!

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Posted by Mikeysgirl

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Posted by Kara and Todd

It's completely fine to give less than you gave at the first wedding. In this situation, I'd probably give a registry gift instead of cash, anyway.

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That sounds like a good idea!

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I agree.

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Posted by Kara and Todd

It's completely fine to give less than you gave at the first wedding. In this situation, I'd probably give a registry gift instead of cash, anyway.

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That's a fabulous idea- i never thought of that- thank you :)

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Posted by nmagel

I disagree. It's not his brides fault that he has been married before. I would give the gift you would expect them to give you at your wedding.

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I have to agree - It may be a 2nd wedding for him, but is it a first for his bride? FH's brother got married last year, his 2nd wedding, and we gave what we normally would at wedding.....it was her first wedding, and her day - I don't think it's fair to necessarily 'discount' the gift based on his past.

But, that being said - don't strap yourself for $$. Give what you can - I believe that goes for any wedding, 1st or 2nd

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Posted by nmagel

I disagree. It's not his brides fault that he has been married before. I would give the gift you would expect them to give you at your wedding.

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She's not giving less because she went to his first wedding. She is giving less because her circumstances have changed. We can only give what we can afford. If she cannot afford to give the same gift, then she shouldn't strap herself to give more. I don't see anything wrong with giving a registry gift if you can't afford to give a large cash gift.

Give what you can!
XOXO
Kitty

Thanks so much for everyone's feedback! I appreciate all your opinions- I got a little more information which helped- the groom told me that they got an all inclusive deal which was soooo reasonable- so I am going to buy them a really nice gift but spend a little less than the first time- not because its his second wedding but because of my financial situation- we have our wedding to plan for and we are trying to save for a house.

thanks again :)

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Posted by Collette

Wow..this is my FH 2nd wedding...I hope people won't skimp bc of that! Being in a certain financial situation is one thing but not bc it's a 2nd wedding...

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It was apparent to me from her first post that she's not giving less b/c it's his second marriage - she's giving less b/c she cannot afford to give as much as she got last time.

I think she was mentioning that it was a second wedding b/c she was afraid her gift would be compared to what she gave before, which she can no longer afford. I don't think she was intending to slight him b/c it was his second wedding.

Honestly, it's not about the gifts - if you can't afford to give a $300 gift this time around, don't!

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Posted by Kara and Todd

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Posted by Collette

Wow..this is my FH 2nd wedding...I hope people won't skimp bc of that! Being in a certain financial situation is one thing but not bc it's a 2nd wedding...

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It was apparent to me from her first post that she's not giving less b/c it's his second marriage - she's giving less b/c she cannot afford to give as much as she got last time.

Honestly, it's not about the gifts - If you can't afford to give a $300 gift, don't!

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thanks Kara