There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

R&J0806 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:10 PM

There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

FMIL has a friend named B. B is crazy - those words come from FMIL, not me. B has a daughter, J. J and B had a HUGE falling out and J has no interest in speaking with her mother.

When we were making the guest list, FFIL told FMIL to invite only one of them, becuase they will likely cause a scene. She blew that off and said they wouldn't. FFIL said 'well do you really want to use the wedding to test that out?'

So FMIL told me she only invited J. However, an RSVP came back from B, obviously sent without me being told about it. Fine, no problem. B's RSVP said 'Please seat me with my daughter, J.'

Yesterday J's RSVP came back and said 'please make sure I am not seated with my mother.'

Now I know this is FMIL's problem because she has to do the seating for them. But, I can just picture B causing a scene if she's not seated with her daughter. And if she tries to sit with her daughter anyway, her daughter will scream.

Ah!!!!

gina674 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:11 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

I don't know what to tell you, but good luck!!!!

Katie&Chris2006 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:26 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Yikes!!!! Best of luck!

JanuaryBride06 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:26 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

It's a wedding, not not a talk show. If people can't suck up their issues for one day and resort to full out screaming, then they deserved to be shown the way out.

eta- My father, brother and cousins were ready to do that - because you never know.
Good luck

sarahradio5 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:31 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

I think the only word for this is:

YIKES!!!

nypdgirl Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:32 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

WOWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Good luck! And if they try and start anything have 2 big strong men waiting 2 bounce them right the hell out of the hall!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

BEANS Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:34 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

It is a wedding & they should not be making seating requests-that is just crap. I had to seat family together that wasn't speaking & you know what-they got over it & were civil for the night. If either causes a scene you can very easily have them escorted out. I wouldn't worry yourself with this.

AutmBride Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:47 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Posted by JanuaryBride06

It's a wedding, not not a talk show. If people can't suck up their issues for one day and resort to full out screaming, then they deserved to be shown the way out.

eta- My father, brother and cousins were ready to do that - because you never know.
Good luck

I agree, this is not about THEM and their issues, it is about you and your hubby to be. I would seat them at opposite ends of the room and if you happen to speak with either of them I would simply remind them of this.

Mitabtrfly Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:49 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Posted by AutmBride

Posted by JanuaryBride06

It's a wedding, not not a talk show. If people can't suck up their issues for one day and resort to full out screaming, then they deserved to be shown the way out.

eta- My father, brother and cousins were ready to do that - because you never know.
Good luck

I agree, this is not about THEM and their issues, it is about you and your hubby to be. I would seat them at opposite ends of the room and if you happen to speak with either of them I would simply remind them of this.

'

I agree..and have a similiar situation. My mother and her sisters/brothers don't speak to each other. One of my cousins..doesn't speak to his mother...It's unreal! Seating is going to be fun!! UGH!

LBride Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:50 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Who requests seats?? that's so out of line, they're guest, not the boss!

franksgirl323 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 01:51 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

OMG.....First... That is stress you don't need right now. I really hope this settles down and everything goes smoothly for you.

soon2bcopswife Posted: Jul 12, 2006 02:02 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Alright...

IT IS TIME TO GRAB THE BULL BY THE HORNS!!!!

You need to get the phone # of both ladies and have a talk..

'Hi Crazy lady #1, you are invited to MY wedding and I am glad you can come, I need to stress to you how important it is that there be no outbursts, dirty looks, murder inducing thoughts....etc. Should you choose to not follow my guide lines, you will be REMOVED. Thanks, can't wait to see you'.

Signed,
The blushing bride

greenfreak Posted: Jul 12, 2006 02:07 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Posted by BEANS

It is a wedding & they should not be making seating requests-that is just crap. I had to seat family together that wasn't speaking & you know what-they got over it & were civil for the night. If either causes a scene you can very easily have them escorted out. I wouldn't worry yourself with this.

Ditto!

And make sure they both know it too; that you will not tolerate any fighting and will giving their pictures to your Matre D.

kathrynlinton Posted: Jul 12, 2006 02:08 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Oh we had this nightmare too. DH's parents had a really messy divorce and his dad's family hates his mom's family. Blah blah whatever . It was 20 years ago, and DH's father is deceased!

Anyway. We did sit them at opposite sides of the room and they did not interact. All was fine and it will be at your wedding.

Goldi1021 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 02:48 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Posted by greenfreak

Posted by BEANS

It is a wedding & they should not be making seating requests-that is just crap. I had to seat family together that wasn't speaking & you know what-they got over it & were civil for the night. If either causes a scene you can very easily have them escorted out. I wouldn't worry yourself with this.

Ditto!

And make sure they both know it too; that you will not tolerate any fighting and will giving their pictures to your Matre D.

I agree. I also wouldnt seat them together. Give your maitre'd or banquet manager instructions to have anyone with questionable behavior removed from the premises. I told that to mine.

FrogGirl0917 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 02:58 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Posted by soon2bcopswife

Alright...

IT IS TIME TO GRAB THE BULL BY THE HORNS!!!!

You need to get the phone # of both ladies and have a talk..

'Hi Crazy lady #1, you are invited to MY wedding and I am glad you can come, I need to stress to you how important it is that there be no outbursts, dirty looks, murder inducing thoughts....etc. Should you choose to not follow my guide lines, you will be REMOVED. Thanks, can't wait to see you'.

Signed,
The blushing bride

Hi Crazy Lady #1 I love that

Seriously though - I hope all works out well for you and that these two realize that they should behave themselves and act like adults!!

MJDoc12 Posted: Jul 12, 2006 02:58 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Posted by soon2bcopswife

Alright...

IT IS TIME TO GRAB THE BULL BY THE HORNS!!!!

You need to get the phone # of both ladies and have a talk..

'Hi Crazy lady #1, you are invited to MY wedding and I am glad you can come, I need to stress to you how important it is that there be no outbursts, dirty looks, murder inducing thoughts....etc. Should you choose to not follow my guide lines, you will be REMOVED. Thanks, can't wait to see you'.

Signed,
The blushing bride

i totally agree. the passive agressive approach won't work here! you gotta nip it in the bud BEFORE the wedding.

seriously--who requests seating????

reenielady Posted: Jul 12, 2006 03:13 PM

Re: There may be a bad scene at my wedding with guests

Sorry to hear about unnecessary stress :(
Regardless of how your FMIL decides to do the seating she should call each of them and warn them no outbursts will be tolerated and let which one of them know that there seating request wasn't granted.