I heard through the grapevine last summer that an old friend from college had gotten engaged (before Rob and I). I didnt have a phone # or know if she was in NY or CA, but I emailed her at the 2 email addresses I ahd and sent her a facebook message congratulating her. I never heard a word from last summer until today (not even an email congrats when we got engaged). This is the email I get:
'Hey Jennifer, Can I would love to invite you and Rob to my wedding. It is August 8th in XXXX NY at 6pm. at XXX (www.XXXXX.com) You can just e-mail me your response. Can you send me your address so I can send you an invite? I hope all is well'
Umm. it's a Tuesday and I have work and can't get off with 2 weeks notice.
do i send a gift?
Chrissywish
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
That is definitely a thing that makes you go hmmm.....I personally feel like you don't have to if you don't want to. I would at least send her a message letting her know that you are unable to attend, but being that she never felt the need to respond and you are invited this way (when apparently through face book she could have at any point got your number or address) I would not feel compelled to send a gift unless you want to. If you want to be nice, you could always get something simple off her registry.
SillyBeans
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
I would def. not give a gift. I would just say you didn't have enough notice , so you can't attend. the email she sent, was it one of the two email addresses you used when you emailed her?
jenheartsrob
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
Yup, and she did 'reply to' because my original congratulatory note to her was copied below...
waterspout4
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
No gift.
alioop4282
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
Ok sounds to me that they didn't meet their minimum and need to fill the sits. I would definitely not go nor would I send a gift.
HearzBellz
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
Posted by alioop4282
Ok sounds to me that they didn't meet their minimum and need to fill the sits. I would definitely not go nor would I send a gift.
I agree
sr081906
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
Since she did not reply to you previous congratulations message... and she is emailing you now (I assume with the same address), that means
It sounds like you are on B or C or D list. Or she emails you at the last minute so she knows you can't come but is hoping for a gift.
I would politelly decline due to the short notice and not send a gift.
kathrynlinton
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
Posted by HearzBellz
Posted by alioop4282
Ok sounds to me that they didn't meet their minimum and need to fill the sits. I would definitely not go nor would I send a gift.
I agree
That was what I was going to say too....
My sister was friendly with a girl she worked with and when the girl didn't mean her minimum, she invited my sister and a couple of people from work last minute. They chipped in on a gift, but it wasn't much. I wouldn't take offense to this, but if you can't go, don't worry about it either.
drpepper318
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
No way would I send this girl a gift... she's just using you and doesn't care about you, she just wants to invite you to meet her minimum and to get $$$ out of you. Don't let her get away with that! No gift!
BRIDEMICHELE
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
No gift. Since it is obivious that you are a B Lister and you can't make it, no gift is necessary. However, being a future bride yourself, help her out a bit and respond asap. You know that she needs to know right away.
moonlithaze
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
I wouldn't send a gift.
jenn122397
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
Very shady...I don't think you need to send a gift.
AlmostMrsKelly
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
i definitely wouldn't go. and i definitely wouldn't send a gift. i would reply to her email and congratulate her... tell her that you weren't sure you had gotten your e-mail but you see she has and that you wish she would have responded sooner, maybe you would have been able to make it this was a very shady move. i think i'd be a bit insulted.
ant n tilde
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
i would NOT send a gift
i mean i plan on having an A and a B list too - but the B list invites are still going out like a month before so hopefully those people won't realize it. . . .
this sounds like a D list situation . .
LaurenluvsTJ
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
I would send a card with perhaps a small gift or something off her registry. I don't think anything shady is going on, she probably didn't meet her minimum and asked you to join in her day. This happened to me, so I have sympathy. I didn't ask these people at a late date because I wanted money, I asked them because I couldn't orginally ask them because we had to invite all the family members. When those family members responded no, I was able to ask a lot of people I wanted to originally, but our budget didn't allow for.
neener1211
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
I would write back and say that you wished she had replied sooner to your earlier email, so that you could have made plans, but this being last minute, you aren't able to attend.
Were you planning on inviting her to yours?
sarahradio5
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
No gift for her!!!
It definitely sounds like a 'fill the seat' invitaiton.
CLMon7906
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
I'd send a card...but maybe nothing else.
NY031978
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Re: things that make you go 'hmmm'
if i got an invite for a wedding thats 2 weeks away..id def think B list!!! Then id reply thanks for the offer but this is short notice and we cant make it!!!
