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thoughts about children guests at reception?

justinepeter Posted:

thoughts about children guests at reception?

My FH and I are fighting with relatives as to whether it's appropriate for children to be at an adult affair like our wedding reception. We don't believe they belong (unless they're part of the wedding party) simply because a wedding isn't a playground. We are annoyed we'll have to cave in to relatives wishes when our own aren't being respected.

jny4eva Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I completely agree with you. I don't know what is the deal with people wanting to bring children to wedding's. The only children we're having at ours are either the bridal party or our nieces and nephews but that is it. I know some people might get upset about it but I personally don't care.

luvabul Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

your entitled to your opinion. i WISH my wedding had no children in it, but we have huge families and some people will be traveling miles and hours to attend our affair and would really like to bring their children along to... so we agreed.
i had to comprimise... As a child ive attended lots of weddings my whole family was invited too.
Sure my guest list has spiraled 325 people are invited...

its your day, do whatever makes you happy and if the process goes smoothly and your relatives/friends/family agree to not bringing children than thats GREAT news for you
empressdani Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I love the kids but on that day its....no kids, no questions!! Sorry family
songwriterchic Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I agree - we're only allowing the kids that are in the wedding party, because I don't want too many kids disrupting our day. Not only that, but you usually have to pay full price for kids to attend, and the parents don't necessarily give a bigger gift to make up for it.

thelastresort Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I totally agree with you. I have a no kids policy myself. Plus my hall charges full price for kids. I'm not about to pay that for them to eat chicken fingers. I don't think so.

nanny111 Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I agree...... only bridal party and close family. This is my second wedding and I will be having children.... mainly because I have my own children. But at my first wedding I wouldnt hear of it.

But if u decide to have them--- I am setting up a seperate table with little (wedding appropriate) activities for them. And while I am not doing this I read that you can hire wedding attendants to care for and entertain kids at weddings for like $50. per hour.
PeteysBride Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I say stand your ground. We will be having two kids at our wedding-5 and 2 year old ONLY because they are coming from Puerto Rico and their families are going to be at the weddign and all of my relatives (they are second cousins) so we have no one to leave them with. We're ok with that but we said no other kids. As a teacher, I know what short attention spans kids ahev and weddings even with kiddie tables, are no fun. Their parents cant have as a good a time because the kid is either running around or clinging. Not worth the aggravation. I used the 'Its our wedding and thats the way it will be,' phrase a lot lately lol...guess I am tired of all the politicikign we have had to do all these past months.

smplynluv Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

Me too. We are having only kids over 16 except whoever is in the bp. Our wedding is over a year from now and we already are hearing complaints. And you know what I say? If you don't like it, you don't have to come. The same thing happened to my aunt where family actually argued with her - but by the end of the night, they all said 'oh I had such a wonderful time! good thing I didn't bring the kids!'

Just stay firm and don't allow some or else it won't be fair to those who didn't bring the kids.
LaurenluvsTJ Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

we had children at our wedding, between the ages of 5-15. They were my FG, RB, and my cousins. I had no problem with them being there at all. Bringing small babies might be innapropriate, but I honestly don't see the problem with children. It was a blast to watch them dance and have fun.

2Be1 Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

Other than the kids in the BP we want absolutely no children at our wedding. I have seen babies cry during ceremonies and we do not want that during ours. I hope that people will respect our wishes and not bring their children
smplynluv Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I think it also really depends on the type of hall it is. I went to a party at JT and kids were running around playing tag and so loud. Then they were venturing out into the halls and one managed to get outside b/c the parents are trying to have their own fun and think the kids are safe in the room.

jessica08bride Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

Personally, we are having about 15 kids at our reception. Our families are big and close and we couldn't imagine the day without them. If they need to run around, let them -it wont ruin my day. Plus they might all be passed out since the reception ends at 1AM (though i hope most of them can still be up dancing and enjoying the VH). But i think thats a decision for you to make. It's your day and you should be able to have the setting you want.

nifheim Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I really think it depends on the wedding itself. What time especially... if your having a night time wedding and its going to run after 9 p.m. you have to realize young kids do not stay up that late and will be cranky and then become a pain in the butt. Chidren running around anywhere is a bad thing unless its a one wedding at a time event. I really don't want to have my wedding interupted by five kids playing tag in the hallways. I know that is soo me me but its the truth.

I am only have the fg and rb at our wedding reception. They will be seven at the time and they are both well behaved and will be okay for the 10 p.m. closing time. They will be tired but they have stayed up that late for one other event and not been cranky.
Kara and Todd Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

We are not having children. Period. To be honest, I don't think we need to explain ourselves to our guests either. They aren't paying for the wedding and, quite frankly, it's not their wedding. They don't have a say.

If there were a seriously extenuating circumstances with family or close friends, then yes, we'd consider that... However, considering we gave everyone about 9 months notice to find a babysitter, it shouldn't be an issue. Also, our wedding reception goes until midnight. We don't feel that it's an appropriate place for children.

Luckily, our family pretty much feels the same way, so we (hopefully) don't have anything to worry about.
alison1daland Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

I think kids at a wedding is a matter of preference and bonds. FH and I both have big, very close families. We are both the oldest cousins and all of our younger cousins we are very close with (and a lot of them look up to us). For us not to have these people who are obviously important to us would upset us on our big day. It all comes down to who is important in your life... If you spend large amounts of time with younger relatives and have close bonds with them, you should probably have them at your wedding...

july06bride Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

we had no choice but to have children at our wedding-DHs little brother was 9, my fg was 6 and my rb was 4, then their siblings- also we had many cousins traveling many miles to come to our wedding...how can I ask them to come but not their kids...what would they do with them?
A babysitter they don't know??? that would not work...
So,we had children at the wedding... honestly, I could not have imagine them not there- Since my cousins are much older than I am, I have been very close growing up with their children. They were fine! They danced and ate and had fun! We had some activities for them but honestly, most of them were dancing all night...at about 11, the oldest child (12 or 13??) took the little ones who were tired back to the hotel room (at the estate/inn) and babysat them-a parent walked them to the room and then went back to the reception...the older kids babysat the few tired little ones and all was good!
We had an evening Saturday, black tie optional affair. The children were able to behave, were not wild animals and had a good time!


that said, it is a personal choice that you should not be bullied into! Stick to your guns if you really don't want the kids there. Parents need to understand it is your wedding, your choice! I know, easier said than done!
EGreene79 Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

If you don't want them, for whatever reason, you shouldn't have them. However, if there are extreme circumstances (i.e. people coming from Florida with kids) you may want to at least consider the options. Even with that, at the end of the day it's a personal choice, and you should do what you want and think is best.

We are having 8 kids at our wedding. Two are my nieces who are flower girls, and 6 are from Florida. I'm not going to force them to hire a babysitter who they've never met. I'm not worried about the kids running around or crying - not my problem! The parents will have to control them, and I doubt I'll even notice them. Even if I do, that stuff just doesn't bother me. However, we're not allowing anyone else to bring kids because I already have too many guests, and I don't want 30+ kids there. If someone else has a special situation, I may consider it, but other than that, my answer will be 'no.'
blu6385 Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?

we are not having any kids at our weddings and its for several reasons ... but the biggest reason is we cant afford it ... there are to many kids and and our list would grow ridclously ... (other reasons i dont want kids running around plus the drinking its bad enough i have to worry about the guests getting home safe but to worry about kids who parents might have been drinking is too much) i am sure it will create problems but what ever if its that big of deal then my answer is then dont come ... its my day and most of my relatives didnt have kids at their wedding ... i was going to only have the FG and RB (kids that are in the wedding) attend but i have now elimnated all FG and RB so there will be absolutley no children!!!


ETA: I do have out of town guests but i will offer them babysitters and probably offer to pay them to watch thier children while the attend the reception
SusiBtoM Posted:

Re: thoughts about children guests at reception?


Posted by nanny111

But if u decide to have them--- I am setting up a seperate table with little (wedding appropriate) activities for them. And while I am not doing this I read that you can hire wedding attendants to care for and entertain kids at weddings for like $50. per hour.



It is your choice whether to have children as guests or not. I personally do not want to have children other than my niece (FG) and nephew (RB) there. Some of my family guests who have children requested that they NOT be invited so they can have a good time without them.
If you do invite children, hire a babysitter, get some activites to keep them busy during the reception, and ask the parents to keep an eye on them as well.
My RH charges half price for children. Still a lot of money for chicken fingers and FF.

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