Brides Helping Brides ™ - Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

eden Posted: Oct 09, 2006 11:59 PM

Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

Has anyone read this article about how it gets increasing harder to have babies after 27?

Making Time For Baby Article

The article's been out awhile now but I'm not sure if everyone has read it. If you're 30+ does this article make you think twice? Just wondering...

scappy123 Posted: Oct 10, 2006 04:34 AM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

It used to worry me alot, but now that i am 36 and pregnant. FH is 42!

MichLiz213 Posted: Oct 10, 2006 08:20 AM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

It's when your ability to have a child declines, but it's not impossible. Most people don't start their families until their mid to late 20's. My parents started when they were 21. So as much as I would love to start my family right after the wedding, I think I'm going to still hold back a bit for a couple of years.

ant n tilde Posted: Oct 10, 2006 09:57 AM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

honestly, i know this freaks a lot of girls out BUT i am blessed because of my family history. . .

I am the baby out of six ( two siblings and three cousins, but we were all practically raised together)

My sister had her first baby at the youngest age, she was almost 30 and had her second baby two years later, with no difficulties ( actually kind of got pregnant before she was fully ready both times!)

my brother's wife had her first baby at 34, no problems

my cousin in law had her first baby in her early thirties, no problems. . .

my mom had ME at 36 (12 years after my brother, OOPS!)

my cousin just turned 30 and has no plans to be pregnant until after my wedding. . . she is my MOH ( this is her decision not mine, i would love a preggo MOH, lol)

so i guess bc i have all of these great examples of happy healthy gorgeous perfect babies being born to women who are 30+ i have NO problem waiting a few years ( i will only be 25 when I am married) I guess if I didnt have those women around me, and i only had access to these scary articles. . . I would be more worried!

CLMon7906 Posted: Oct 10, 2006 11:01 AM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

wow...i have to say that prior to reading that, i knew most of the information....what i didn't knw was how 'abnormal' your eggs become in your 40s. kind of scary! good luck to those who have waited, are waiting and will find themselves trying really hard.

Bridex100 Posted: Oct 10, 2006 11:54 AM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

I was thinking of pushing back my baby timeline.

Maybe I should rewind it back to 30 being the magical baby age.

leshellem Posted: Oct 10, 2006 12:21 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

I always knew this and have been worried ever since I was 27. Last year I even looked into adoption and artificial ingsimination (sp). I disagree with the artical that women are waiting. The only thing I was waiting for was for someone to love me and want to marry me. I never worked 80 hours a week or thought about how successful I could be in my career. It is simply put harder to meet someone when your are independent, but if you are alone you have to be.

Luckily I have found someone to love and will be getting married. Im not waiting to have a child. I know girls my age who have trouble. And yes there are exceptions but its not always the norm. Im personally am not willing to take the chance.

TheFutureMrsM Posted: Oct 10, 2006 12:45 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

Wow interesting article, A friend of mine has told me that the quality and quantity of your eggs starts to decrease at 27. My doctor never told me this. I never wanted to be a young mom, where as my friend did, she is 26 and is pregnant with her 3rd child, So my best friend will be totally done with having kids by age 26. And me im 26 and not even thinking of that yet. The thing is she always knew she wanted to be a young mom, she wanted to be a mother, and even though they had no money, did not plan on working at all, and were renting she had her first baby at age 20. I believe we choose our choices in life, Time does fly, and having kids is a huge responsibilty. I have the perfect guy, we have the perfect house but we are still not ready to have kids, i beleive that fertility problems can happen young or old, some people can just not have children, but the article should of focused on adopting a child, there are so many unwanted children born everyday. Maybe if i wait i wont be able to have kids, but if i really really wanted them i would of found a way, like my friend did, to be a young stay at home mom.

rojerono Posted: Oct 10, 2006 01:30 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

I am a little older then most of you. I have 2 children already – but I also have several friends who are struggling with conceiving. One of my girlfriends is actually going through the process of adoption – which turns out to be a LONG wait and no picnic – after round after round of failed in vitro and injections. Another friend had terminated 2 pregnancies in her late 20’s because she ‘wasn’t ready’ and is now dealing daily with guilt and remorse because she simply cannot seem to get pregnant. It breaks my heart and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

And even though my family history indicates that I should have no problem conceiving a third child… I am prepared for the idea that my age might cause some challenges with my ability to have a baby after the wedding. I will be disappointed – but I will also know that it is a direct result of my own choices.

I wasn’t anywhere near ready when I found out I was pregnant with my first. I was commuting over an hour each way for my job. FH and I hadn’t even DISCUSSED marriage. He was in a dead end job,.had just lost his entire life savings when the dot com’s went bust and wasn’t even sure he wanted kids – he called them “money sucking screamboxes” But we managed. I was still nursing when I found out I was pregnant with number 2! And then I lost my job, he quit his to start a new career and our car died. Talk about NOT READY!

As it is… well we still don’t have extra money for luxury cars or exclusive private schooling. I have never been to Africa and I can’t afford designer handbags (there would be no point anyway since my pocketbooks are usually loaded with snack crackers, toys and wet wipes rather than make up and mirrors). Instead of a teak patio set and outdoor bar I have a swingset and play house. Dinner out is more apt to be at a pizzeria than an actual restaurant. I don’t have a pristine house… I have fingerprints on the sliders, cookie crumbs in the carpet and juice spills on a daily basis. And I have more laundry than I know what to do with! But I wouldn’t trade any of it for anything in the world – not for money, career, prestige or fame. I’d rather have those grimy little arms wrapped around me in a bear hug and those jelly faced kisses over anything else I can imagine. And all of the sacrifice and all of the struggle is more than worth it to me.

The message that I get from the article – is to choose your priorities and be careful when you do so. Because it MAY be too late when you finally think you have the ‘right’ amount of time, money or ‘things’.

LaurenluvsTJ Posted: Oct 10, 2006 01:35 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

I am already concerened about having problems and I am 28. However, my grandma had my mom when she was 40, and that was over 50 years ago, it was almost unheard of to have a baby at that age then - and there were no fertility doctors. So, although it is harder, it can be done, and naturally.

Bridex100 Posted: Oct 10, 2006 01:41 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

I always wanted to be a young mom. I'm already passed that age. I believe I'm in the 'average' age category already.

eden Posted: Oct 10, 2006 07:44 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

The average age to have a baby is still mid twenties...

With that said, i think we all need to be emotionally, physically and financially ready before we start to have a baby.

But the article does make you think abit, if you're in your thirties and want half a dozen kids but still haven't started yet... get cracking! :)

MichLiz213 Posted: Oct 10, 2006 09:18 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

Posted by rojerono

I am a little older then most of you. I have 2 children already – but I also have several friends who are struggling with conceiving. One of my girlfriends is actually going through the process of adoption – which turns out to be a LONG wait and no picnic – after round after round of failed in vitro and injections. Another friend had terminated 2 pregnancies in her late 20’s because she ‘wasn’t ready’ and is now dealing daily with guilt and remorse because she simply cannot seem to get pregnant. It breaks my heart and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

And even though my family history indicates that I should have no problem conceiving a third child… I am prepared for the idea that my age might cause some challenges with my ability to have a baby after the wedding. I will be disappointed – but I will also know that it is a direct result of my own choices.

I wasn’t anywhere near ready when I found out I was pregnant with my first. I was commuting over an hour each way for my job. FH and I hadn’t even DISCUSSED marriage. He was in a dead end job,.had just lost his entire life savings when the dot com’s went bust and wasn’t even sure he wanted kids – he called them “money sucking screamboxes” But we managed. I was still nursing when I found out I was pregnant with number 2! And then I lost my job, he quit his to start a new career and our car died. Talk about NOT READY!

As it is… well we still don’t have extra money for luxury cars or exclusive private schooling. I have never been to Africa and I can’t afford designer handbags (there would be no point anyway since my pocketbooks are usually loaded with snack crackers, toys and wet wipes rather than make up and mirrors). Instead of a teak patio set and outdoor bar I have a swingset and play house. Dinner out is more apt to be at a pizzeria than an actual restaurant. I don’t have a pristine house… I have fingerprints on the sliders, cookie crumbs in the carpet and juice spills on a daily basis. And I have more laundry than I know what to do with! But I wouldn’t trade any of it for anything in the world – not for money, career, prestige or fame. I’d rather have those grimy little arms wrapped around me in a bear hug and those jelly faced kisses over anything else I can imagine. And all of the sacrifice and all of the struggle is more than worth it to me.

The message that I get from the article – is to choose your priorities and be careful when you do so. Because it MAY be too late when you finally think you have the ‘right’ amount of time, money or ‘things’.

Really well said.

missross Posted: Oct 10, 2006 09:20 PM

Re: Time Magazine: Making Time For Baby

Honestly, you shouldn't even read these types of articles. Every woman's body is different. I think it makes perfect sense that it would be easier for most women to have children in their early 20's. However, you have to wait till the time is right for the both of you to do so, no matter what. Trying to race against the clock solves nothing. Both my grandmothers had children well into their 30's and it looks like my sister and I will be doing the same at this rate! Good luck ladies and stay positive!!! You will be blessed!