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Getting “Tipsy”: Rules, Regulations, And Etiquette For Wedding Day Tipping by Mia Bolaris-Forget (Staff Writer LIWeddings) After pinching and saving for your wedding, the last thing you’ll want to think about is additional funds that you may not have figured in, but are essential if you want to practice exemplary etiquette.
Yes, we’re talking about gratuities. Yes, your vendors may be getting paid and are simply doing their job, but they “do” (usually) work hard for their money and tips are a major (much looked forward to) part of their salary.
But, once you get over the initial shock, you’ll likely find yourself wondering where and how your supposed to come up with these extra funds, and just how much you’ll need to come up with.
Here are some general rules for tipping on your wedding day:
Tips should be handed to the wedding coordinator, if you have one, otherwise you should appoint someone you feel comfortable asking to take charge of making sure gratuities are distributed. Tips should be calculated in advance and set aside in separate (labeled and sealed) envelopes, making it easier for the chosen individual to hand out. Get the 411 Before you just start dolling out money, however, find out about the tipping policies. Talk to the hotel or club manager at your reception site to see how tips are normally handled. Also find out if a service charge is included in the total on your bill. If so, you don't need to offer an additional tip. Remember, it's completely acceptable to have these kinds of conversations with your vendors, preferably at the time you sign a contract, rather than the day of the wedding. You can only know what people are expecting if you ask them. Who You Should Tip:
Wait staff - If the tip is not on the contract already, 15% of the total catering bill is tipped. Wait staff do the hardest physical labor on your wedding day. Caterer & Waitstaff: If your reception isn't in a hotel or club, there's a good chance your caterer has to work out of a tent or minimally equipped kitchen, and the waitstaff may have to run up and down steps carrying heavy trays. In these circumstances it's nice to show you appreciate all of their efforts. Figure the tip according to the number of waiters -- decide on a dollar amount (let's say $20) and multiply by the number of servers working at your reception, plus some for the catering manager. This total can range from $250 to $500.
matre'd $500
Bartenders - 10% of the total liquor bill, presented to the head bartender or divided equally among the total number of bartenders who worked the full evening. Make sure that a tip hasn't been added to your contract already.
Restroom and/or Coatroom Attendants - $.50 to $1.00 per guest, prearranged again based on the number of guests.
Makeup artist or Hair Stylists - You don't have to tip them if they come to you. If you go to the salon, then you should tip them 15%. Why you ask, well the salon makes the money, not the individual. If you have received a good job, and you would tip normally, then go ahead.
DJ or Band- If your DJ or band leader owns the company then the tip is optional but if the DJ or band leader is an employee $50-100.00. If you have 2 DJs (DJ & MC), give each person $50.00 in separate envelopes. When your guests rave about your reception later, it's the DJ that had everything to do with the fun.
“Optional Gratuities”:
Business Owners - You don’t have to tip the owner of a business, unless you feel that they have gone beyond the call of duty and you want to give them a token of your appreciation.
Ceremony or Reception Musicians - $5-10/hr per person, in one lump sum given to the person in charge.Banquet or catering manager - doesn’t need to be tipped unless they’ve thrown in extras or saved you a few hundred dollars on your bill. The tip would be between $50-$100.
Photographer and Videographer - If these vendors own the company, then the tip is optional. If they are employees $50.00 goes to the main photographer and he/she can give a split to the assistant.
Officiant - To tip them is to trivialize their profession and extremely bad etiquette. Generally you pay your fee and that's it. If you wish to make a financial contribution to the church, you can do that separately.
Florist - You don't need to tip the florist for making your arrangements but you can tip them an extra $5.00 per delivery location (3 locations=$15.00) or $10-20.00 per staff member in one lump sum, for set-up and delivery.
Wedding Cake Baker - You don't have to tip for the baking of the cake but if you are at your reception venue at time of delivery and set-up = $10.00
Wedding Coordinator or Room Manager- This is the person managing the reception venues staff and facility the night of your wedding = $50.00Your
Wedding Coordinator - If this vendor owns the company, then the tip is optional. If they are an employee = $50.00
Your Wedding Planner - This person has planned your wedding from start to finish. An appropriate tip would be 10% of their total commission or bill.
Hair - $20
Make-up - $25
Limos - $50 each driver
Photographer - $50 for the 6 hour one and $100 for the 10 hour one
Videographer - $50 for assistant and $100 for 'main'
Maitre 'D - $400 (it was a little more than $4 per guest)
Bridal attendant - $75 (should have given her $100)
