to hire or not to hire a doc

This is a hard a question, because I think it depends on your wedding and the people involved. I can tell you why I decided to hire a DOC. Though since I haven't had my wedding yet, I'm not sure how good/bad of decision that was.

I decide to hire a DOC for a few reasons:

- I and no one involved in the wedding has ever organized a large wedding before. I honestly have no idea what to expect. I've only attended them as guests, never as a bridesmaid. My sister (MOH) has only attended a couple as a guest, never a bridesmaid. Same goes for my parents.

- I am a very anxious person who worries about everything, so I think having someone else to do some of the worrying for me will be very helpful.

- I'm not very detail oriented. I'm easy going, which almost seems like a reason not to have one, except I'm worried that I'm so easy going that important things will slip through the cracks.

- My FH is determined to treat this wedding like he's a guest, so I don't feel like he will be a lot of help with organization. And I would like to feel like a guest too.

- My FMIL, who thinks we're crazy for hiring one, is well intentioned, but sometimes forgets what we want and instead does what she wants.

Before making this decision, I did a lot of research on here and on other wedding websites. I didn't find ANYONE who said they regretted hiring a DOC, but I found many people who said they wish they has splurged on it for a more stress free day. The price we got was VERY reasonable, so it seemed worth the risk.

However, I did talk to my only friend who had a big wedding. She did not hire a DOC, so I asked her why. She said her sister handled all that stuff. Her sister was the maid of honor, and she had gotten married herself about 3 years before, and had been a bridesmaid numerous times. So if you have someone like this who will handle everything for you, it may not be worth it.

Now that I've given all the advice I have, quick plug for my DOC - A Modern Day Affair. They've been great so far, and as I mentioned the prices were extremely reasonable. So far I've working with Laura and she is a complete sweetheart.

It also depends on where you are having your wedding... At the Bourne Mansion where we got married, they have both a Maitre d' and a bridal attendant to take care of whatever you need, so a DOC would be redundant.

But, I totally agree with the above ladies - if you don't have any experience planning events, don't have someone in your family or wedding party who you think can/will 'take charge,' or you tend to get really stressed out, it might be worth it.

Definitely worth it! We had a lot of logisitcal issues for the morning of the wedding, so I wanted someone to make sure the wedding party was where they were supposed to be and when (for when we took pics, to make sure everyone got in the cars and got to where we were going, without wasting a lot of time), someone to make sure my centerpieces and other decor (memorial candle, favors etc) was set up correctly; and so many other things throughout the day (and one of my favorite things they did was to carry my lipstick all day ). The reduction in my stress leading up to the wedding knowing the DOCs were there was soooo worth the $$$$ (I used A Modern DAy Affair and loved them!)

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Posted by JuneBug86

I was opposed to hiring a DOC until someone gave me an idea to post an ad on craigslist to hire DOC's who are just basically starting their business or do it on the side just to build a few connections and their portfolio. If all you need is simple assistance such as seating guests, packing your stuff,etc... I suggest you try this option you get to save money because you set your own price. If your situation is a little more complicated and you feel like you really need to have someone the whole day oversighting everything I suggest go for the more established places like cheeky glam, etc... HTH

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This! There is also a service called thumbtack, similar to craigslist, which I used to find my photographer. I didn't end up going with the photographer I found on there, but I was offered some really great deals when I posted an ad saying 'I need a photographer this day for this much money'

If you go that route, you could also consider just hiring a DOC for 3 hours or something to set up, which will probably cut the cost and that way you can have someone there to take care of the set-up and organization of vendors and then they can leave.

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Posted by pauladanielle

[If you go that route, you could also consider just hiring a DOC for 3 hours or something to set up, which will probably cut the cost and that way you can have someone there to take care of the set-up and organization of vendors and then they can leave.

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At least some, if not all, DOCs offer full day and partial day packages (I had a partial day package with AMDA)

I just hired one because I don't want to do anything the day of my wedding. FH & MOH thought I was crazy, but my mom was so happy. MOH was like anything they can do you, your mom, or I could do... Uh... I DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING & I DON'T WANT TO STRESS!

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Posted by mattandjess2013

I just hired one because I don't want to do anything the day of my wedding. FH & MOH thought I was crazy, but my mom was so happy. MOH was like anything they can do you, your mom, or I could do... Uh... I DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING & I DON'T WANT TO STRESS!

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EXACTLY! I totally agree. Who did you hire?

Am I the only one who's not getting a doc? I was playing with the thought, but FI outright refuses. He's pretty adament.

I feel a bit guilty about getting one and have a great bridal attendent already, she told me she handles everything, so I've agreed to no doc. She handled the food tasting fantastically with so many brides in attendance. She was really on it. I like her a lot. She and my FI can handle all the problems that may arise and carry the checks then. I can't forsee anything that may arise other than a vendor not showing which would be out of her or FI's control though.

I don't think I have a maitre'd. I've not been introduce by our venue coordinator anyway. Just a bridal attendant who's very sweet and organized.

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Posted by PSP

Am I the only one who's not getting a doc? I was playing with the thought, but FI outright refuses. He's pretty adament.

I feel a bit guilty about getting one and have a great bridal attendent already, she told me she handles everything, so I've agreed to no doc. She handled the food tasting fantastically with so many brides in attendance. She was really on it. I like her a lot. She and my FI can handle all the problems that may arise and carry the checks then. I can't forsee anything that may arise other than a vendor not showing which would be out of her or FI's control though.

I don't think I have a maitre'd. I've not been introduce by our venue coordinator anyway. Just a bridal attendant who's very sweet and organized.

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I don't think you're crazy at all. A DOC is really just an extra piece of assurance that everything will turn out the way you want it. I know my maitre'd will take care of all the set-up and organization, so I don't really need one either. It's mostly just a personal choice - whether or not you feel comfortable with your RH/maitre'd/bridal attendant handling all that for you or not.

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Posted by pauladanielle

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Posted by PSP

Am I the only one who's not getting a doc? I was playing with the thought, but FI outright refuses. He's pretty adament.

I feel a bit guilty about getting one and have a great bridal attendent already, she told me she handles everything, so I've agreed to no doc. She handled the food tasting fantastically with so many brides in attendance. She was really on it. I like her a lot. She and my FI can handle all the problems that may arise and carry the checks then. I can't forsee anything that may arise other than a vendor not showing which would be out of her or FI's control though.

I don't think I have a maitre'd. I've not been introduce by our venue coordinator anyway. Just a bridal attendant who's very sweet and organized.

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I don't think you're crazy at all. A DOC is really just an extra piece of assurance that everything will turn out the way you want it. I know my maitre'd will take care of all the set-up and organization, so I don't really need one either. It's mostly just a personal choice - whether or not you feel comfortable with your RH/maitre'd/bridal attendant handling all that for you or not.

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I agree no DOC for me & FH, Mom & MOH would kill me if i did

I hired one and it was the best decision i made! I was so worried about making sure all my little things were done the way i wanted. After i booked my DOC all my worry left lol She did an amazing job and pin pointed my vision the way i wanted everything.

I went with Simply Couture.

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Posted by fintababyetc

It also depends on where you are having your wedding... At the Bourne Mansion where we got married, they have both a Maitre d' and a bridal attendant to take care of whatever you need, so a DOC would be redundant.

But, I totally agree with the above ladies - if you don't have any experience planning events, don't have someone in your family or wedding party who you think can/will 'take charge,' or you tend to get really stressed out, it might be worth it.

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i am glad to read this.. i am getting married at the Bourne next March, and was going back and forth towards getting a DOC, but leaning on the no side. After reading this, I def don't think I will be getting one!

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Posted by fintababyetc

It also depends on where you are having your wedding... At the Bourne Mansion where we got married, they have both a Maitre d' and a bridal attendant to take care of whatever you need, so a DOC would be redundant.

But, I totally agree with the above ladies - if you don't have any experience planning events, don't have someone in your family or wedding party who you think can/will 'take charge,' or you tend to get really stressed out, it might be worth it.

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Bridal attendants only handle issues with the hall though. They do not deal with issues that may arise with your vendors...that's what I'm told anyway. Is that correct? In that case, it would not be redundant b/c if one of your vendors doesn't show or comes late or whatever, then the DOC would have to handle that.

I kind of want to hire a DOC. I know FH would think I was out of my mind and that they would be too much $$, my mom would probably feel like it would be taking away from the whole planning experience for both of us (I think she doesn't really get what they do), and my future SIL works at Oheka Castle and pretty much said that she'd be mad if I did hire one LOL I just don't want to burden any one to be in charge if anything goes wrong. I also want to be a 'guest' at my wedding, not stressing about what's going on, but I'm sure plenty of brides have had beautiful wedding days without them