To invite/or not invite ...

When FI and I started dating we were only together maybe a few months and he got invited to an e-party and it was just him who was invited and I totally understood. I didnt get mad at him or the hosts. They didnt know me and it was there party. 4 years later, we're engaged and that couple is our best man and matron of honor.

Just a note: Though about 2 months ago we got an invitation to a christening and the girl just wote his name on the invite. Her and her hubby know we are engaged but maybe she forgot to put my name or felt that since he and I are engaged my name wasnt necessary. But it really ticked me off.

Anyway, its your wedding and you invite who you want to invite. If people throw a fit because they cant bring a date, then you know what dont come, I know other people who would truely be honored to come to my wedding.

I also feel that if i dont know you are you going to know anyone at the wedding besides the person you came with and will you have a good time. I would rather invite people I know and who know others at the wedding and will have a good time.

I think another good rule could be that only guests 18 and over can bring dates. Sassyz--I think it's crazy to have a 14 year old date! JMO!
This is exactly why my guest list is getting out of hand! Ahhh!!

I feel the same way about the 14 year old date- but my father is paying for the reception- it is his son- and he was the one that brought it up. I guess I should've said that it was ridiculous.

Also, one cousin is dating a man that's married (a ten year relationship of adultery) so I had to invite her with him even though they aren't 'legal'.

Anyone doing the no child under 16/18 allowed at the wedding....

like I said earlier I have many cousins, and a few of them are under 16. Personally I think they would be bored, and I don't want alot of kids at my wedding. But I have one aunt who will be annoyed that her three brats can't go and will probably stay home because of it. Though I'm sure my uncle will come with out her and probably have a really ggod time with his brothers (he won't have to worry about what his wife thinks about everything he does).

Ya know what else I just thought of, i have a friend Nicole that is single and loves being single. She gets invited to parties and weddings all the time and people tell her she can bring a date and she never does. She likes going to these things alone because she doesnt have to make her date feel out of place because he doesnt know anyone, and it gives her time to mingle, drink, and just kick back with friends.

There are people out there who are single and enjoy going to these things alone because just like someone said earlier why should they have to babysit there date.

I also agree about the age thing. I think setting an age limit on who can bring a date is a good idea.

What I have learned is feelings are going to get hurt along the way and all you have to do is just go with the flow and dont let people annoy you. Put your foot down and stick to your guns. If you do that, then everyone else should back off.

PLEASE and the rest of the family nonsense I cannot begin to retell on this site- even though it's anonymous- it's PURE SCANDAL.
I knew I wouldn't make it through invitations & seating charts alive.

My wedding is in November of 2003. I have already had a fight with my father over the guest list. I finally told him that I will make a list of my family, his family, my friends, his friends and if we have any spots left then he can invite people. Our room only fits 150 people, and he keeps coming up with more people. I finally told him that I was not willing to not invite his friends or my friends to invite some second uncle that if I tripped over on the bus would never recognize..

So what does he do..he invites that uncle and aunt to a family holiday party. And now they know I'm engaged..

I'm not looking forward to it...

Sassy you will be fine. Just be strong, lay down the law and stick to your guns. If someone doesnt like it oh well then dont come to the wedding. It is there loss not yours. They will be the ones missing out on a great time and missing out on seeing you on your special day.

Just be strong and I am going to tell you the best advice I was ever given, 'if you feel strong about an issue fight till hell freezes over, then fight on ice'

It is your wedding and if someone isnt happy about something so what, dont came. You dont need that negativity. No is no and thats just how it goes.

Believe me I have so many issues in my family I wouldnt even know where to begin, but I put my foot down and I told my mother and father this is how it is and if dont like it then dont come. It will truely be your loss. My parents respected my wishes and once i say no they dont push.

Just be strong and focussed. Dont let anyone tell you, who you have to invite. Lay the ground rules down and if they dont like well to heck with them. This is your wedding and you invite who you want there.

Sorry if i seem harsh, but girl just be strong. Dont let anyone make you upset. This is the best time in your life and its what you want not what other people tell you that you want or should do. Be strong and positive

Chippatrid-

thank you SO MUCH for your words of encouragement & advice. Sometimes I think the LIWedding girls are the only ones that understand wedding stuff! It's totally overwhelming! And now that it's so soon- I'm having a freak out. I'm one of those people that hates making people mad.

thank you again.

Anytime

We have all been through it. You can always trust the ladies of LIWeddings to be there for you.

Well said Chippatrid!

I don't like to make waves either, but sometimes you just have to put your foot down.

Is your FH with you on this issue? Mine is--thank god because I don't think I could have stood up to FMIL on this issue without his support.

Ugh...what a nightmare. I am sticking with the no dates rule too. I do not think its a mistake. People need to get a grip, its your wedding...you make the rules.

Don't worry, its almost over.

My FH is fine with it- of course to of his friends from florida (where he is originally from) are coming with guests because they are not comfortable with driving up/flying up solo.

Of course i couldn't say no- and now all this mess is happening and I want to RUN TO VEGAS.