ughhghh beyond upset!

so one of my bridesmaids is going to be student teaching next semester and told me that she can't pay more than $500.. so i thought about it and got back to her and said you'll have to check with the MOH to see what the expenses are for the bridal shower (my mom's paying for the shower reception location but the BM are paying for the invitations, favors, etc...). well my mom has a big drinking problem.. when she drinks she turns into this nasty person that says whatever is on her mind, it's like night and day. well she calls the BM who is having money troubles and goes off on her, i have no idea what was said, but i can only imagine how terrible it was b/c this is how my mom is.. she's done this to me my whole f-ing life. she had a few words with my MOH a few months ago too! so anyway, my BM who has been my best friend since high school said that she can't be in my bridal party b/c of what was said. i have been hysterically crying for an hour now.. i offered to pay $200 to help her out with the wedding expenses.. that's how much i want her in the wedding. she's like the sister i never had i can't call my mom b/c it's just going to fuel the fire.. she'll call my BM and go off on her for upsetting me or w/e even though it's my mom's fault. i just don't know what to do.. i wrote her a really long fbook message b/c she turned her phone off for the night. she said she would sleep on it and let me know tomorrow.. i'm just so hurt and needed to vent to someone

I'm so sorry you're going through that - I hope it all works out and she stays in your bridal party!

thanks - i'm just soo mad at myself b/c i said something to my mom today b/c i was frustrated, i said something like well she can pay $200 for shoes but can't pay an extra $200 to be in my bridal party. my FH and i have been paying for the whole wedding ourselves and it's been super stressful since i'm not working, i'm a full time grad student. if i never said anything to my mom everything would be fine right now

That's a crappy situation. I think $500 from a BM for the shower (if I read that right?) is a pretty reasonable contribution to begin with.

I'm sorry you're stuck in the middle, I wish I had some advice for you! Can you talk to your mom when she's sober? If this girl is the friend you say she is, she should understand to a point what you're mom is like.. hope everything works out the way you want it!

oh honey i'm so so sorry

i hope things work out...

yeah that's $500 for everything, my mom's paying for the shower and just wants the girls to help with the invitations and favors. it just really sucks b/c the only person really being hurt is me and i did nothing wrong to begin with

I am SO sorry,

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Posted by chelle2386

yeah that's $500 for everything, my mom's paying for the shower and just wants the girls to help with the invitations and favors. it just really sucks b/c the only person really being hurt is me and i did nothing wrong to begin with

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:( I agree that you should maybe try to talk to your mom and see if she can apologize to her. Not sure if that would make things better, but maybe this way your friend will understand what happened.

thanks girls i'm definitely planning on talking to my mom tomorrow when she's sober.. it's just so awkward because my mom doesn't know my friend that well. i explained to her that my mom was drunk and she knows from when i was a kid that my mom's been like this, but it's just such a bad situation. it's a lose, lose i feel like, if she stays it's going to be awkward between them and if she doesn't then i'm missing out on having my bff in my wedding pictures, at my side when i get married.. ugh this is killing me

Wow - I'm soo sorry that this happened....hopefully she'll sleep on it and have a clearer head in the morning and realize that this didn't come from you and that regardless of how your mom acts she'll still want to be there for you. Hope it all works out!!!

Im so sorry this happened!! you must be so upset! I dont want to be involved and I hope I dont upset you but your mom had no right to call her or any of your bms to say negative things to them. she should come to u first if there is a problem ya know? Oraying that ur BM calls u tomorrow and says ok to staying in your BP.. BIG HUGS!

im so sorry i hope everything works out!!