Im really dumb. No matter what decision I have to make for the wedding Im CONSTANTLY asking my friends, family etc what they think. Why do I ALWAYS do this? Its MY wedding and it should be how I want it. A huge dilema that I have is that Im the kind of person that ALWAYS cares about what other people think. Im asking people what they think of my shoes, my bm dresses, invites, favors.....the list is endless. Am I the only one that does this?
Im so worried that if I make a decision on my own, people will be like Oh God look at her shoes, or Oh I cant believe she chose THOSE colors for her BM dresses.......Stupid I know but thats just how I am.
What do you suggest I do? Is there anything? I think Im fixin to have a minor break down again
felicita
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Re: Um, need to vent?
I have a similar problem (ie. i just asked you all what you all thought of wedges for wedding shoes!).
I'm trying to improve on this myself, but I think the best advice to keep in mind is that it's your wedding and what you say, goes! And I've also found that once you stop asking for opinions, most people won't give them voluntarily. I just tell people what I'm doing and they say, 'oh that's great' no matter what I tell them. Either they're lying to me or they think it's really great, but it doesn't matter because the choice has already been made!
Also, I'm sure a lot of people around you have different tastes and different budgets, so what's right for them may not be right for you anyway. Try to concentrate on the things that you like and make you happy.
Make your decisions and make them final and then share with everyone!
Ivori
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Re: Um, need to vent?
Hi, I think it is ok to ask others their opinion. I do it all the time but I make sure that I love it first and foremost. Don't let this stress you out enjoy
imas98
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Re: Um, need to vent?
In the beginning of planning I was worried about what people would think of my choices too but then I started to really think about it......and as time went on I realized I don't like every choice my friends make when it comes to their weddings, homes, etc right?? So they're not going to like every thing I decide to do or not to do at my wedding !! Don't be such a people pleaser !!! You'll drive yourself crazy trying to make everyone happy. Do what you want for your day and don't worry about what other people are gonna say !!
cuteauburnininny
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Re: Um, need to vent?
hey nancy,
i wouldn't worry so much on what people think. its your day and do it how you and gerry want yur specail day to be. its nice to get opinions from family and friends but when it comes down to it make sure you love it. you don't want to have any regrets on your big day. so i'd do it they way you want it. your such a sweet girl. i am sure people aren't going to say things behind your back and if they do there the ones who have no confidence in themselves if they have to put others down,
oh yeah your not dumb!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thelastresort
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Re: Um, need to vent?
I can totally identify. There are a few people in my life who have something negative to say to me about all of my ideas. I think about what they say but then I go on my instinct. If I think it's going to be nice and I think that FH and I will enjoy it, I do it.
I don't know about you, but the negative speakers in my life are also people who have not been in the wedding loop since like the 80's so they have no idea what's new and in style and the new trends that are out. Remembering that helps me to be dismissive of their comments.
Your wedding will be perfect to you and that's what counts.
portjeffbride
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Re: Um, need to vent?
we're all sensitive about some facet of wedding planning...
me, I'm very decisive, and know exactly what I want things to look like... and don't care about other people's opinions (except FH, of course!)
I'm a basket case about the wedding planning schedule, and all the things that have to be done. I feel like I'm drowning in vendor appointments!!!!
And even the most miniscule DIY feels like I'm climbing everest until it's done... I know is sounds odd, but I literally feel like I have a wieght on my chest!!!!
LoveRocks
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Re: Um, need to vent?
No, you are so not dumb and you are not alone!! You just value the opinions of those you care about. I'm the same way and I ask many people's opinions about things, but ultimately, the final decision has to be mine to live with. Try not to stress to much about other people. It's your and your FHs day and you two are all that matters! I know its easier said than done. With the exception of the dress, I ask my FHs opinion about everything and hold it higher regard than anyone elses.
mishmosh328
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Re: Um, need to vent?
Im just starting to do the planning and I noticed that I am the same way! I have to get approval of everything I do! Im just planning the eparty and it took me forever to make the littlest decisions because I needed to make sure that everyone agreed. I hope I am not like this with the actual wedding planning!
