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Upset and Pissed(long)

aquag12283 Posted:

Upset and Pissed(long)

So my mom has been basically no help to me during this wedding process. Everything comes before me and my wedding. Even last week when I was having chest pains she tells me I just have to run back to work quick so I can send something out and then well go to the hospital. Ok Mom so if I was having a heart attack I probably would have been dead when u came back because God forbid I come before work.

She works in the rectory of the church and also runs the schools cafeteria. She had told me in June when school was getting out now that I dont have school we can work more on wedding stuff. Have we done anything no. She came with us once to look at BM dresses. I asked her if we could go to Tri-county tomorrow to look for a veil and she tells me whats the rush..mm hi I want to get as much done as possible this summer before I go back to work in September but she doesn't get it. Plus I want to start paying for most of the things now so I dont have huge bills right around the wedding. So then I told her I was hot and she told me why dont u go to your room then I said fine I;ll go to my room then she called me a bridezilla and I called her a b*t*h. I thought this whole wedding planning would be fun but its not because i have no help from my mother but she wants to put her two cents into everything from what dress I should get to what dresses the BM's should wear. I am so pissed and hurt and upset. Just needed to get this off my chest. If you made it this far I thank u since I know this is long.
rendel Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

I'm so sorry, it is suppose to be a happy experience and it would be if you just ignored all the negative people in your life. I have the same issue with my FMIL and I have learned to ignore it and not let it get the best of me!!!!!! I refuse to let people like that ruin our day!!!!!!! FH and I have agreed to have no expectations of her for the wedding, it is sad but its what we need to do to be able to enjoy the wedding process!!!!!!!!!!

allornil Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

Im really sorry youre going through this. I have the same problem. We're leaving my mom out.

Remember this is your day!
cMm2011 Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

IM so sorry you are going through this
did you try talking to her about it and telling her how you feel and that you are hurt?

Sometimes my mom gets like this but when i tell her she is hurting me or upsetting me she applogizes. Sometimes they dont realize the things they do hurt us
Ang9483 Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

I was upset with my mom recently also. Everytime I tried to talk about the wedding she would ignore me or not be interested I was getting really pissed. She finally just recently came around. I was reallly upset it hurts. You would expect them to be excited and want to help you out. I told her how I felt and she has been better. Lets hope she keeps it up. Maybe your mom will come around too. Maybe you can tell her how you feel.

Yankeeelove Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)



I'm sorry
mybabylovesmoi Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

I'm sorry she's upsetting you. Honestly, I feel like our parent's generation didn't do weddings like we do now so even though they are happy for us, most of them just don't 'get' why we have to book a hall a year ahead, spend more than 500 on a dress, , what's the point of petal cones, etc.

My mom rented her gown and they put their wedding together in like a month (over 200 guests!!) so she also tells me 'You have plenty of time!' when I talk about vendors etc. Well, things have changed since you got married a million years ago
bebita0830 Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

I'm sorry this is happening, maybe ur mom is stressed too??
ready2wed Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

I have to agree that I think your mom just doesn't understand because things are different than they were before. My mom keeps telling me 'no one used to really have weddings in my time so I don't know what to do.' I wanted to start looking for a venue a year ago but my mom said that I can wait. Here I am a year later looking for venues and praying that they are not booked up . It will get better just use a BM to go with you and pick out the dresses. If you stop talking to your mom about wedding stuff she will start asking.
DCgirl82 Posted:

Re: Upset and Pissed(long)

Im so sorry you're going thru this You are supposed to be happy and excited! I would be so upset if my mom didnt show intrest in all this stuff Did you tell her how you feel? Im sure her job is important but you're obviously stressed out and if your having chest pains thats so serious! You should Def be coming before work and many other things!! I wish I could help but heres a HUGE HUG!!!

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