VENT!

My MOH who just got engaged just asked if it would be ok to have an October 08 wedding....I told her just not to use my ideas or colors because I know I can't have 'dibs' on a season....but deep down I am a little upset.

I just emailed her back and told her that I don't want her to change her mind but I wanted to let her know that I was a little bothered by it... I just said that it is one of those weird things.....weird enough she felt the need to ask my permission...so we will discuss tonight...I just couldn't let it go without being honest about how I felt.

oh no! sorry!!

tell her 'sorry biiitch, you can do a july 2008 wedding'

but i dont think she would be happy lol

Thats kind of stinks. Congrats to your friend though

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Posted by he gives me butterflies

Thats kind of stinks. Congrats to your friend though

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I know..I want to be happy and not be upset...and not that I am raging right now...it is just weird

as I've said over and over your response should be ...CONGRATS now I can learn from your mistakes! hehehe it makes ya feel better!



COngrats to her though and kudos to you for keeping hte lines of communication open and telling her it bothered yo alittle!
COmmunication is KEY!

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Posted by tinadansr

as I've said over and over your response should be ...CONGRATS now I can learn from your mistakes! hehehe it makes ya feel better!



COngrats to her though and kudos to you for keeping hte lines of communication open and telling her it bothered yo alittle!
COmmunication is KEY!

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Thanks... that is what FH said...we can see all the things to watch out for and get ours perfect!!!

we have close friends getting married 2 weeks before us. we started dating sept 2002, they started dating nov 2002. we got engaged may 07. they got engaged june 07. we're getting married 8/17, they are getting married 8/2.

At first I was a little disappointed because I kind of wanted to get married first since we did everything else first, and the 2 are pretty close to eachother, but there wasnt really anything we could do.

Bride-to-be is a teacher and needed to get married during the summer and their church wasnt available june/july (what they orig wanted). they are OOT so we wont have a big guest overlap, and they promise to be back from their honeymoon in time so instead I'm enjoying being on the same planning timeline as her.

I didnt feel like it was my place to ask her to change her wedding date because I wanted to get married first, in my own month, in my own season or in my own year. They are good friends of ours, and since we havent been to any other weddings we will just view it as a trial run before our own!

I'm sure they will be very different.

Are you hoping your friend will push back her wedding? change the month? the season? just not steal your ideas?

If she is a close friend (which it seems like she is) I doubt she'd steal your ideas, and it's a lot to ask her to push her wedding back. maybe she cant afford a summer wedding. maybe they have time constraints with respect to months (FH and I do). maybe the Oct date is meaningful to them for some reason. Maybe she likes fall weddings! I'd be really upset if our friends got married right before us, set 8/2 and then told us to change OUR intended date, because we were very limited with what dates work for us (between law school, work schedules, etc). be glad shes not getting married Oct 09(!) and enjoy lots of wedding time in the next 2 years

Well I just talked to her and we are both on the same page.... she might not even do an october wedding...I never wanted her to push it back so I could married first...I guess you just get territorial over your wedding and I explained that to her and she understood....she said she felt weird about it and that is why she asked if it would be ok...we both agreed that if we were just good friends it would never be an issue but since we are both one anothers MOH it was a little different....so I feel better and I am glad I said something to her...it turned out for the best...

Now I get to help her plan hers and I'm happy!!!!

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Posted by little34

Well I just talked to her and we are both on the same page.... she might not even do an october wedding...I never wanted her to push it back so I could married first...I guess you just get territorial over your wedding and I explained that to her and she understood....she said she felt weird about it and that is why she asked if it would be ok...we both agreed that if we were just good friends it would never be an issue but since we are both one anothers MOH it was a little different....so I feel better and I am glad I said something to her...it turned out for the best...

Now I get to help her plan hers and I'm happy!!!!

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Happy to hear everything worked out for the best!

glad to hear everything worked out

i have a friend who recently got engaged and wanted to have it the same month as me. my date has been picked since november 2006!
they are doing it the month before me.
i was annoyed but whatever.
i don't even see why anyone would consider doing that.... then have it after our weddings lol.

i'm glad you were honest i wish i was a bit more up front with it.

We are so evil!!!

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Posted by italyngigi

i have a friend who recently got engaged and wanted to have it the same month as me. my date has been picked since november 2006!
they are doing it the month before me.
i was annoyed but whatever.
i don't even see why anyone would consider doing that.... then have it after our weddings lol.

i'm glad you were honest i wish i was a bit more up front with it.

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I'm not trying to start trouble, but if you are getting married the end of Nov 09, and I was a friend of yours who just got engaged, I would not want to wait until 2010 to get married. I would avoid picking the same date as you (I tried to avoid friend's birthdays, etc) but I don't think it's fair to claim a month, season, year, or all of the time before your wedding. What if your friend didn't want to wait to get married? What if her anniversary was in November and the date was meaningful to them? At least she didn't pick Nov 09!!!

I honestly think having a friend getting married quite a bit before you can be something great -- a practice run where you can figure out what you liked and didnt like, what went smoothly and didnt, and fix it for your day. It's like a sweet dress rehearsal where you actually have enough time to make changes if you want.

Edit: I might have misread your post. If she *did* originally pick Nov 09 that's kind of crappy on her part -- there are so many other times to get married between now and then and she knew about your date. In the end though it's her choice -- maybe 08 was too soon and '10 too far away? maybe they really liked fall? who knows. we have friends getting married 2 weeks before us so I feel your pain but we're choosing to enjoy it rather than make a fuss about it