Vent: Crying over my stupid shower....

I'm getting so frustrated with the shower planning----this is causing me too much heartache and I need to vent.....

My mom, aunt, and grandma are hosting my shower and though I'm thankful, I just wish they'd 1) stop asking me what I want to give as gifts, color schemes etc. because everything I suggest, they don't like (I wanted a kitchen gadget wishing well and my aunt thinks wishing wells are obnoxious) and 2) telling me all the details about the shower. I don't want to know what the shower favors are because you asked my opinion on what I wanted and you did something else because you didn't like my idea.

I just wish I allowed my FMIL to make a shower instead of my family.....

Just tell them you want to be surprised and wash your hands of all responsibility. GOod luck!

i'd say 'guys this is supposed to be kind of a suprise. i love you for doing this for me. i think it'd really cool to have the wishing well thing but if you don't want one then we dont have to have it (unless its like super important to you!) and i will have a blast all the same. everything else is totally up to you. i will love whatever you pick.'

and i mean substitute in things that are ABSOLUTELY NOs or DEFINITELY WANTs.

Ugh sorry! Explain to them that you want to be aleast a little surprised and now that you have told them your ideas, you'd like to stay out of it going forward. Maybe one of your friends can step in to help plan instead of you?

On a side note -- You might be the only person who wishes her FMIL is planning your shower!

I'm going through the SAME thing!
my mother and MOH are in total shower mode... and I keep saying I don't want any part in it.
MOH is better about keeping me out of the loop, but does insist on rushing me on doing my reggy... and she insists on telling me what should be on it. my mother is BAD... every 2 seconds she's bugging me about the shower.

that's why i did my own shower. i did what i wanted and didn't have people asking around or doing thing's i would be mad about.
but don't worry , i'm sure it'll come out great!

I laugh b/c I JUST had this fight with my mother over the weekend. I want it all to be a surprise but she keeps talking to me about it over and over and over again!

---

Posted by weddingbees

i'd say 'guys this is supposed to be kind of a suprise. i love you for doing this for me. i think it'd really cool to have the wishing well thing but if you don't want one then we dont have to have it (unless its like super important to you!) and i will have a blast all the same. everything else is totally up to you. i will love whatever you pick.'

and i mean substitute in things that are ABSOLUTELY NOs or DEFINITELY WANTs.

---

I agree... and I'm assuming that you have a color scheme for your wedding already.... Can't you just tell them those colors and then the rest of what Weddingbees said? I like the word choices....

and don't tell them that you wished you let FMIL do it... Can she work with them at all????

Hang in there. I agree with the others - let them know you want there to be a little of a surprise for you on that day!

I'm having the opposite problem - saying I don't want to be involved, but I think I do. Control freak.

Okay done crying and now just pissed.....I mean, I DO want to be involved IF they actually would take my opinions and ideas that they requested in the FIRST place ---but if you are just going to say, 'no we are doing balloons instead of flowers' and 'no, your grandma wants to do these favors instead', and 'no, your aunt doesn't want to have a wishing well', keep me out of it!

Re: FMIL--she's just no drama and so easy to deal with...FH and his family are just so mellow and easy to deal with its almost sickening. I would never tell my family that I'd rather her plan my shower though...that would be WWIII.

Okay, thanks guys for hearing me....it helped to vent on here----moved on from the crying spell.