So i have a pretty big family, with lots of cousins, mostly girls some boys. 2 of my cousins in particular (mind you they live around the corner) i am very close with so i asked them to be bridesmaids. They are like my best friends and are there for me everyday. So last night my cousin (who lives 3000 miles away in california) writes me this nasty email about how its unfare that i asked them two of them and not her and her sister. And she is deeply hurt and if it was her wedding...blah blah blah...so the bridezilla sarcastic ***** in me wanted to respond ..'well its not YOUR wedding' but since we are flying out to californi on tuesday to visit i feel the need to be nice and try to smooth things over. so i write back how im very sorry that she is hurt but its not my wedding but mine and FH.... and together we chose who would be in our BP and that my 2 cousisns who live here are a big part of our lves and although i love her she can probably count on one hand the amoutn of times she has actually been in the same room with him. Now mind you we dont have the type of relationship where we pick up the phone just to say hi....we talk when one of us is visiting or if we have something to tell the other one. We are in no way shape or form....close......i refuse to feel guilty for not asking her.....like i told her we chose the people who are in our lves everyday to help and support us. I was honest and polite...but now i have so much anxiety about going i dont even want to go..i hate confrontation. But im tired of feeling guilty about everything when its suppose to be OUR day. sorry so long but i figured you guys would have some pearls of wisdom...TIA
KarinAmanda
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Re: *VENT* things like this make me want to elope!
I agree and i feel that you are handling it correctly ... its your wedding! dont let anything that anyone else says or does get in the way of what you and FH want for your day
bemyyoko
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Re: *VENT* things like this make me want to elope!
I can't believe how rude some people are.
DavaDay
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Re: *VENT* things like this make me want to elope!
That was pretty rude. Maybe she's jealous that the other cousins are going to be more in the spotlight that day.
Can you think of some other way she can feel included? Like, doing a reading, or a toast at the rehearsal dinner, or something like that?
MyLobster
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Re: *VENT* things like this make me want to elope!
You are completely justified in your response. It was mature and you handled it well. Good for you for not letting it stress you out!
bemyyoko
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Re: *VENT* things like this make me want to elope!
Posted by DavaDay
That was pretty rude. Maybe she's jealous that the other cousins are going to be more in the spotlight that day.
Can you think of some other way she can feel included? Like, doing a reading, or a toast at the rehearsal dinner, or something like that?
I don't think the OP should have to find something for the other cousin to do. She said that they're not close so her cousin should understand. Also, at this point, if I was her cousin and I was as upset as she seems to be... I'd probobly be offended that she gave me another job because I'd feel like it was out of pity or something. But that's just me.
