One of my bridesmaids has decided to host my bridal shower in NYC even after I strongly hinted to her that I would prefer to have it in NJ where 2/3 of the guests live.
She has not only decided to have it on the East Side of NYC (we all know NJ is on the West side) but she asked just recently if I'll be available Labor Day Weekend!
And she wants to send an evite instead of a proper invitaton through the mail! My other bridesmaid said she didnt care about their opinions but wanted things HER way. Should I be upset at this?
Smiles111
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
you have every right to your feelings!! Sounds like something that needs to be addressed and find out why she's acting that way. Is that how she normally acts?
Mandyin2007
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
She should have taken your opinions into account. I would be upset!
sarahradio5
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
maybe she can host her own little bridal shower and the other girls can do their own in NJ?
It's been known that brides have had more than one for different reasons (including logistical) thrown by different people.
If she's not taking ANYONE else's opinions or needs into consideration (including yours!) except her own, then maybe someone else should plan it?
neener1211
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
yes I would be...in fact, i'd make is so the other bridesmaids took over....
I dealt with a bm like this for a wedding I'm in...and it was horrible!!!
AMGBride2008
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I would be pi$$ed.
soon2bcopswife
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ugh, sounds like what my mother pulled for my shower.
I think you should be upset!
greenfreak
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
Judging by what you've mentioned about her in the past (that she didn't even want to invite your family!), in addition to this, I'd probably be a little upset.
It's the one thing that you can't control in all this, unfortunately. Does it reflect badly on you? I don't think so. Is it inconsiderate of her? I would think so if it was me.
I guess it boils down to how much stress you're dealing with right now. You could probably let it go if you put your mind to it and concentrate on the other plans instead.
Have there been any other issues with her besides? With the dresses, shoes, bachelorette party, etc?
eden
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
I'm glad I'm not the only one to feel this way, she's been causing me stress from day one of this wedding process. Calling me a bridezilla no less even though she's the one who has been demanding me to do things her way.
Ie, strongly hinting that I should allow kids at the wedding, hinting that I pay for all the bridesmaid dresses, and then asking my brother to have a talk with me after I chose another makeup artist over the one she recommended.
There's more ... but I really don't want to cause further rifts between us 'cus she is my sister in law. :(
We had a huge row when she told me she wanted only to invite my friends, no family members, to the bridal shower. When I asked 'why no family' she said 'we're planning your shower, you have no say whatsoever about it!' :(
No family??!!!
Tria1110
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
Kinda stinks... but it's hard to be really mad when someone is doing something nice for you.
LoveBug1124
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
She should definately have taken the rest of the bridal party's ideas and opinions were. I think you have every right to be upset, she's not even putting what you want first and it should be about you!!
LaurenluvsTJ
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
why is she 'queen' of the bridesmaids? If the other girls don't like what she is planning, why don't they let her know?
sugarkube4
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Tell her you already have plans Labor Day weekend...
Hisforever
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yes, i would be a bit upset. thats not very nice too do...
eden
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Posted by LaurenluvsTJ
why is she 'queen' of the bridesmaids? If the other girls don't like what she is planning, why don't they let her know?
She's a really strong-minded person and my two other bridesmaids friends are like me, we don't like confrontations unless it's something serious.
I guess she bulldozed them into submission. :(
I told her I'll be away that weekend. There was no way I would be that inconsiderate to my guests - make them drive 1.5 hours to NYC for a bridal shower on labor day weekend!!! :P
eden
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Re: Vent: Would You Be Angry At This Bridesmaid?
Posted by greenfreak
Have there been any other issues with her besides? With the dresses, shoes, bachelorette party, etc?
Yeah, she told me my first wedding dress choice was too plain, and strongly hinted for me to wear very lacey dress when I absolutely don't like lace. It's just not my style.
Oh and she didn't want to invite family 'cus she said it would not be appropriate for them to be there? I think she got the shower confused with the bachelorette's party.
So now we're having the bridal shower one week before the wedding even though I gave her the guest list 2 months ago!
