VENT....brother arrested...sorry its long

Ughh....So my brother was arrested a few weeks back & what seemed like a little problem keeps snowballing into a BIGGER one. He worked at a big store on LI & they accused him of taking money from the register. According to his manager the security guard saw him take $ & leave the work area. He said that he was bringing large bills to the back (he's an ast. mngr) to get smaller bills for change. When they checked the records & his electric register swipey thing everything added up fine. A week later they again accused him of stealing. This time they even said $150 was missing from the register. When he said he didn't take anything they told him it happens all the time & this isn't an accusation towards him - just that as the assist. manager in charge he needs to take responsibility. They explained he'd need to go through a week of review training & only manage PT until this gets cleared up. Well my IDIOT brother (sorry I know I really don't mean that) goes & signs their paperwork saying yes he'll agree to this. Did he READ the papers & FINE print - NOPE! 10 min later they had him in handcuffs b/c the papers were basically a signed confession that HE took the $ & they put in the paperwork the total $$ they had ever been short since he started working there - so not $150 - but $3200!! I was completely doubting my brother (which I feel so guilty about) & saying he made this up & probably did take the $ & now it turns out they fired one of the cashiers who always worked with my brother b/c he stole $150 - the same amount - a week later. He admitted he's been taking $$ for months & is willing to pay it back...but they won't drop the charges on my brother & refuse to talk to our lawyer. They claim that the agreement between the company & this other employee was settled out of court & is confidential.

In the end my parents are getting stuck with huge lawyer bills & going to court with him to get this dropped from a felony to a misdemeanor or maybe a violation. I just feel horrible b/c they keep telling me to plan the wedding like nothing ever happened but I feel so guilty! Guilty b/c there's a part of me angry with my brother for signing the papers & now financially committing them to lawyers when they have an expensive event to plan & Guilty b/c I don't want to spend a dime on a wedding if there's more important things to spend the $ on. I feel so guilty about feeling selfish but it always creeps into my head how this will affect my wedding...thats tha part that stinks most.

Ughh....sorry this was so long - just needed to vent!

That sucks! I'm sorry. But if your parents are telling you to keep planning, then go on. YOu have some time- you can take a few weeks out to recoup and then get back into planning mode.

I can't add anything but Im sorry you're having trouble.

My brother signed paperwork without reading that basically made his Workers Comp claim a disability claim. Left him jobless with a newborn child for nearly a year and add on top medical bills for back surgery. Now my brother calls me first before signing anything.

It's natural to feel all the things your feeling. Your worried for your brother and parents, And of course in the back of your head your thinking of how it will affect your wedding.

For now just focus on trying to help/support your brother and parents. What he's going through right now, right or wrong is what is most important.

Eventually all this stuff will work itself out, and hopefully for the better..

SO for now I send you lots of

Thanks so much. It's just so frustrating on top of everything else. You guys are always such a huge help.

It stinks that your family is going through this. I can relate to you feeling guilty because you're wondering how/if this will effect your wedding, but I think it's normal to feel that way. It's not that you don't want your parents to help your brother, but your worried that his mistake is going to cost you in the end. Most likely it won't have any effect on the wedding, and even if it does, cross that bridge when you get there. For now, follow your parents advice, and go on planning. Good luck!

THis stinks! I am so sorry for you. I love how they say 'oh, just sign this...' and POW! What a crappy thing for his management to do.

I hope all works out. Keep on planning...it will take your mind off things.

Good Luck & Take Care!

Stephanie