I'm hearing a lot of ladies sharing some pain about 'surprise' no's, additions to RSVP's, maybe even some 'surprise' Yes's. FH and I are visiting Vineyard Caterers this weekend (as everyone probably knows by now). I've never done this before and I raise a question about this b/c of all the out of town people we are planning to invite. I'm assuming when discussing the venue this weekend we'll have to give them an idea of how many people we are expecting. Also, if we have lets say 75 to 100 I only want to spend about $100 per person... however, if we only have 50-75, then I don't mind bumping up my willing expendature to $115 or $125 per person and would rather put the money into doing more of the 'frivilous' things I want that I don't think I can afford rather than waisting money on empty seats. I went to grad school in another state and have friends from that all over the place. FH has friends/family all over the country and in Italy. I have family in Florida, but with my sister's wedding being planned so close in proximity to mine, I know that if they can't swing both, they probably won't attend either one. How do I even begin to guess at what my min and max will be... any tips? Should I assume anyone coming from out of town will only be a 50% (or less) shot of coming? Is there away to 'test the waters' with people by emailing them info about your planning and saying 'of course you will be on the guest list' and see if they respond (hope that they do)? What about childhood friends your mom wants you to invite that you never see that live close by, do these usually come or decline? Could I come up with 100 people we both know - sure... but I know that not all those people are going to purchase a flight, pay for airport parking/car service, then rent a car or car service once in NY, hotel, a dress/suit, and a gift! Any tips from those more experienced than I? I'd really rather have fewer people and more bells and whistles.
september2004
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Re: Venue visiting guest min/max question
i had your same approach...
we made a preliminary list and from that made the decision that 100 would be a nice number. 50% of our guest list is OOTers. we guaranteed 80, are shooting for 100, can pay for up to 125. our official list had 185, but they included about 25 people from italy we know will not come (we know this because they did not attend FSIL's wedding last year).
we sent out save-the-dates to start getting an idea of who would be interested in making the trip and then tweaked our guest list accordingly. so far we have about 40 yes, 0 no, but our rsvp date is a month away. i am thinking we will probably have 77 and may have up to 101. it's so hard to tell!
generally speaking:
the more people you invite, the more no's you will get. the more OOTers you invite, the more no's you will get outside of the typical 15-20% rule of thumb...
good luck!
Boop2704
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Re: Venue visiting guest min/max question
Definitely give them a lower number than what you expect. You can always add people on. And if not as many come you can always add extra things in to spice up the wedding even more!!
Mrs.Ptobe
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Re: Venue visiting guest min/max question
What about friends you're not as close to anymore, but really were at one time and you still email here and there... do these usually reply yes or do they tend to decline?
september2004
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venue visiting guest min/max question
Posted by Mrs.Ptobe
What about friends you're not as close to anymore, but really were at one time and you still email here and there... do these usually reply yes or do they tend to decline?
would you go to their wedding?
ckgmwedding
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Re: Venue visiting guest min/max question
Posted by Mrs.Ptobe
What about friends you're not as close to anymore, but really were at one time and you still email here and there... do these usually reply yes or do they tend to decline?
An old friend of mine got married OOT and I didn't see making the trip. We really aren't close at all since she moved. I was actually suprized to be invited and thought she was hunting for an extra gift!
