Very sad

My cousin has been having a difficult pregnancy. She was told a few months ago that the chances of her baby making it to full term was slim and that even if the child made it she (yes, it was a girl) would not live outside the womb. My cousin and her husband decided to leave it in God's Hands and not terminate the pregnancy. Each visit to the doctor brought worse news. Today, she found out that the baby is gone. Now, she is going to have to deliver her stillborn daugter, Desire.

I can't imagine what she is going through. I am trying to think of the right things to say to her, but I know that none exist. I just don't know.

Oh how sad Your cousin will be in my prayers

That's awful!I can't imagine having to go through labor & all, knowing the baby is already gone.

I am very very sorry to hear this..I can't imagine what she is going and will have to go through..

Im so sorry thats very tragic

That is very sad. Just be there to support her right now. That is all you can do.

stay positive..you never know

I am so sorry to hear about your cousin, may they be blessed with more strength to get through this difficult time.

I had a stillborn 6 years ago and its a very very difficult thing, the only thing I can say to support her...is let her talk..I talk about it a lot, and at first every second then less with time, now it is easier to talk about and it helps me heal to do so. If people were hush hush about it, or forgot about it, it would kill me.
I aslo like when people come to the cemetary with me, I went a lot at first, not so much anymore, but the acknowledgement that comes with being there and with others helps so much.

I too had a girl and its still hard. I still cannot go to baby showers, maybe once I do have another child it will be ok, but not yet. I'm better with boy babies too, some people take this offensively, it's just whats easier for me, I can't control it.

My advice is to just listen, and dont wait for her to talk about it, bring it up, if shes uncomfortable she will tell you, but its better then no-one saying anything at all.

The hospital was great about it too, if you want to pass that along. They are very caring Dr's and nurses in the world and they will do whatever neccesary to help her get through this. Leaving that hospital alone is the most difficult thing in the world...she's in my prayers.

Heidi & Donna

I am so sorry for your cousin, her husband, you and your family

My aunt delivered a stillborn boy, and the worst part for my aunt was when (stupid) people tried to act like it was no big deal, like she should just move on or get pregnant again right away. I hope no one does this to your cousin, she'll need to mourn her daughter. I am so so sorry

Donna

Just be there for your cousin. she'll need your support. here's some hugs.

I feel the same way you are feeling about yuor cousin...my friend lost her baby at 5 and a half months, in November, and had to deliver her (a girl too) stillborn...her name is Amalia...

I did not know how to approach her either, but once I did, I cried with her, I listened to her...I cared for her, and hurt with her...just be the best friend you can be, it helped my friend to talk about it, she even showed me pictures, talked about her features, her labor, her everything...

It is such a sad thing to lose that baby who you love, anticipate and care for...she will never be whole again, but here it is, almost 6 months later, and she is strong..she is sad she does not have her baby...goes to visit the cemetary often, and is still a mother, whether she has her daughter to hold or not. Everyone handles it differently, but just be ther, even if she just wants to cry..she will get the post partum, the sadness...my friend cannot go to baby showers either, its still too hard, and she does have the pang of jealousness when she sees people with babies...and it seems since she lost her daughter, not matter what, everything is baby this, baby that...

Holly- you are a great friend and you hit it right on the head, that is exactly what people who go through this need, to talk and have caring people around them.
I have pregnant friends and when I talk about the labor and what it was like for me --some of them look at me funny and I wonder...why? Because I dont have my daughter now does that mean I didnt go through the Labor, or cant share my experiences....its very much like feeling cheated....all the time.... it feels good to share that experience, regardless of the outcome...

your friend is lucky to have you!

I am so sorry.