Wedding Ettiquet

Gin-Char 104 Posted: Jun 04, 2007 08:47 PM

Wedding Ettiquet

Does anyone know where I can find wedding ettiquet about cancelled weddings and what to do about bridesmaids dresses?

I bought watters and watters dresses from netbirde (great place BTW) in store the girls would have paid 355.00 I got them for 190.00 which the bridal party all prepaid (I didn't have money to lay out...nor Do I have it now) BUt since the wedding has been cancelled I am wondering what do I do....give Them the dresses and let them figure it out, or wait until I can figure a way to sell them? Or do I have to give them my money?
Please help either reply or FM me
thanks
BTW dress pic are in my album if you know someone..... OH and they have been on craigs list and e-bay...if anyone has any other ideas please please let me know

PreshusSmurf Posted: Jun 04, 2007 08:55 PM

Re: Wedding Ettiquet

I'm sure this was a difficult decision for you ... and is a difficult time in your life too.

But personally, I would find a way to re-imburse your girls for their expenses related to the dresses. Even if you can only give each of them 1/2 of the $$ now ...

Lemons Posted: Jun 04, 2007 08:57 PM

Re: Wedding Ettiquet

wow sorry to hear that your wedding is cancelled...um as far as the dresses go, I would hope your Bms wouldnt expect you to give them money out of your pocket (especially if they know that you don't have it like that)....hold on to them and see if maybe you can find a bride on this website willing to buy them....repost on the 08&09 boards....(because those ladies may still need dresses) Good luck

lilone9 Posted: Jun 04, 2007 09:09 PM

Re: Wedding Ettiquet

sorry that you had to change your plans. i would see if there are any brides who may be interested in purchasing them from you. You probably should find a way to reimburse your friends but i'm sure they'll understand.

emcheung Posted: Jun 04, 2007 09:38 PM

Re: Wedding Ettiquet

i think if you paid for them, you can do whatever you want with them. if they paid for them, then give it to them to do as they please.

LitBallerinaGirl Posted: Jun 04, 2007 10:08 PM

Re: Wedding Ettiquet

I looked it up online, and apparently there was some kind of seminar on canceling weddings, and the lady said that when it comes to bridesmaid dresses it gets a little sticky.
Gifts should go back to their owners, regardless of the reason why the wedding is being canceled, but in terms of bridesmaid dresses, it depends on the situation.
If the wedding was called off due to a traumatic breakup, then if you are in the monitory situation to give the girls back their dresses then it is appropriate to do so. If you aren't you should explain that and tell them that you will work with them if they would like their money back. (In a situation like this, a real friend will prob be more concerned with helping you cope and tell you not to worry about the 190).
If the wedding is called off because you decide a smaller wedding in the tropics with just you and some close family is a better option, then yes, you should refund the money.
Anyways, that is apparently proper etiquette.

Gin-Char 104 Posted: Jun 05, 2007 09:52 AM

Re: Wedding Ettiquet

Posted by LitBallerinaGirl

I looked it up online, and apparently there was some kind of seminar on canceling weddings, and the lady said that when it comes to bridesmaid dresses it gets a little sticky.
Gifts should go back to their owners, regardless of the reason why the wedding is being canceled, but in terms of bridesmaid dresses, it depends on the situation.
If the wedding was called off due to a traumatic breakup, then if you are in the monitory situation to give the girls back their dresses then it is appropriate to do so. If you aren't you should explain that and tell them that you will work with them if they would like their money back. (In a situation like this, a real friend will prob be more concerned with helping you cope and tell you not to worry about the 190).
If the wedding is called off because you decide a smaller wedding in the tropics with just you and some close family is a better option, then yes, you should refund the money.
Anyways, that is apparently proper etiquette.

thanks....can you tell me where you found that site? I really wasn't sure how to think of all of this being that they are making out on the deal for several reasons one they didn't pay full cost for the dress, they didn't have to worry about paying for a bridal shower gift, wedding gift and batch party adventures oh and not to mention the hotel room and travel expensive.......if The wedding had taken place they would have spent a lot more than 190.00.....i truly appreciate everyone's thoughts I guess I was looking for help in some links or if someone read in a wedding magazine the right thing to do......please Keep posting to let me know thanks.

BTW the one girl that is dating exFH brother is no longer a friend and the other one has just lost her job and needs money to move....i can totally relate to not having money, as this has turned my world upside down.....and i know it is the best in the long run.......the other girls have not asked for their money back and have been suportive through out!

If from time to time someone is doing a tiffany wedding please let them know about the BM dresses...thanks