I'll start with the usual -
I apologize if this offends anyone.....
Things I learned from my wedding experience:
1. You CANNOT control the weather. No matter how many times you check the websites, the weather is going to be the weather. The weather reports are always wrong and they change more than 25 times a day. Don’t stress something that is 100% out of your control. If it rains - think of the STUNNING umbrella shots you can get. If it snows - (which was my dream) - think of the snow falling shots - Gina Z has some - they're BEAUTIFUL!
2. Do NOT sweat the small stuff:
a. Invites – YES, they are VERY important to you and FH, but in reality, most people will look at the date and where it is, mark their calendar and throw it away. Do NOT make yourself crazy about them, do NOT make yourself sad because you can’t afford pocketfolds. Get what you can and be happy!
b. Stamps – if you can’t get the LOVE stamps, NO ONE will notice. Not one single person noticed the special stamps we used on our STD’s and we were soooo excited when they went out. If we had wasted money on Zazzle stamps – I would’ve been devastated, but we just used special Post Office Stamps.
c. Colors – everything does NOT have to match perfectly. Let’s face it, if it did, it would be ‘prommy’ and you don’t want to be ‘prommy’ on your wedding day! If you want pink bok’s & red centerpieces – GO FOR IT. Not one person will go, WOW, that doesn’t match!
d. BM – understand that your bridesmaids accepted the invitation to be in your bridal party because they love you. They wanted to stand with you on your wedding day and celebrate your relationship. This does not make them your beck and call girls, doesn’t mean that they should fold themselves into a pretzel to make you happy….doesn’t mean that if they want to cut their hair, they shouldn’t. I’m not joking when I tell you that most people I know no longer speak to the person whose wedding they were part of. The friendships couldn’t stand the, ‘I need you to do this, you have to do that’ part. Trust me when I tell you that if you don’t stress people out – they’ll go above and beyond for you. If they want blue nails on your wedding day – let them! NO ONE will notice & they’ll be that much happier! I’d rather have a friend with blue nails and a GENUINE smile than a person with a French manicure and a fake grin any day!
3. Realize that this is YOUR day. Do it YOUR way. Do NOT let anyone tell you otherwise. If you always wanted that photobooth and you want to scrimp and save to get it, DO IT. If you want to have belly dancers, DO IT. Your wedding day is one day in your life where you want the perfect memory, not to look back and say, I wish we could’ve done this or that. Everyone and their mother is going to have an opinion on something you are doing, but as long as you and FH are okay with it – WHO CARES??? My mom almost died when she saw i was wearing red shoes & then changing into matching skeakers with Dave & guess what? They were one of my favorite parts of the wedding - the pics with them are FANTASTIC and even in the end, NO ONE saw them unless i lifted my dress to show everyone.
4. Realize that your BP members are not mind readers. If you want something specific for your shower, bachelor or bachelorette parties – TELL THEM. Make sure they know that you are not into the stripper thing, or you ARE. You can’t not tell them anything and expect them to plan the perfect day for you.
5. Know that in a public forum, there are ALL kinds of people. There are people who have thousands of dollars more than you will ever have, there are people who have less than you have in your pocket right now. Don't make yourself sick over what someone else is doing. Just because one person can afford a 2 month European Honeymoon doesn't mean you should beat yourself up over not being able to do it!
6. Understand that this day is about you and your love of FH and his love of you. If 75 people you were expecting to come can't make it, it's their loss. It's VERY hard to see some girls with 250 invited and 225 yes and 25 no. I had a low number and was surprised by some of the people who just couldn't make it or couldn't afford to come. It made me very sad for awhile until I realized that the people that DID make the effort to share our day - they meant the world to me. That i could, at the end of the day, sit back and see us surrounded by 70 of our closest friends was incredible.
Overall - just remember, this day is for you & FH. This is the day you will show your children pictures of, this is the day you will treasure in your heart forever. No one is going to walk away saying, wow - she totally cheaped out on the flowers....what they will remember is how much love you & fh have for each other.
I'm sure i'm forgetting lots of things - and i'll add to this list...but i wanted to make sure that I said what's been in my head for awhile now.
again - apologies to anyone who gets upset....i'm just trying to help.
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