What is the deal with wedding presents? My Fiance doesnt seem to understand that this is an important thing for the wedding. I want us to get each other a sentimental gift. He says we dont have the money blah blah, but its very important to me. What should I do? Plus he is graduating from the police academy 12 days before the wedding, and he should get something extra special for that too. I dont know if I shoudl drop it, but then if I dont get anything special on our weddign day, i will be sad. Am I making sense? Am I being silly about this? Its making me really upset he wont see it my way. Ahhhh!
PrincyJo
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
Maybe he wants to surprise you
meara
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Maybe if it is financial then you could do something non material but emotionally special - so you have a keepsake but it doesnt need to be a big cost -
Calysta
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I really wanted to do wedding presents as well. I always had this image of receiving some thoughtful, amazing gift from my FH. But now that I actually have an FH and are facing the financial realities of a wedding, I'm scrapping the idea.
It's not just the money thing, though. I adore my FH, but he's just not the grand gesture type. He does all of these small things day to day to let me know he cares, and I know he'll feel uncomfortable, stressed and pressured if he has to come up with 'the' gift on our wedding day. So, I've decided that it's one of those things I'm going to let go. Others may feel differently, of course!
Even though he's not going to do anything for me, I am doing a small gift for him. Starting December 4th of this year, I'm going to write daily in a journal about one thing I love about him. Then on our wedding day (or night before), I will give it to him so that he has a year long list of reasons I love him.
xosweetiexo
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I think enough money is being spent on the wedding, so I don't feel the need to exchange gifts. If you have the money and can afford it, then go for it.... but if money is a little tight- it's really not a big deal. It's all about your love for each other.... and so much money is being put into your wedding- if you can't afford it.... you can buy each other something down the road. Save your money.
jtgarsik
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well - originally we were going to get gifts for each other, but honestly when it came down to it at the end of planning - we were SO tight on money. Instead we opted for honeymoon gifts Now i have a BEAUTIFUL diamond starfish necklace from st. lucia, and the hubby has two bracelets..one for dressing up, and one casual. It's nice because everytime i wear it i think of our honeymoon & being on a beautiful vacation together :) ..it's a nice option to compromise on
DeeDee1013
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
Posted by jtgarsik
well - originally we were going to get gifts for each other, but honestly when it came down to it at the end of planning - we were SO tight on money. Instead we opted for honeymoon gifts Now i have a BEAUTIFUL diamond starfish necklace from st. lucia, and the hubby has two bracelets..one for dressing up, and one casual. It's nice because everytime i wear it i think of our honeymoon & being on a beautiful vacation together :) ..it's a nice option to compromise on
We did the same thing. We went to Jackson Hole, WY for our honeymoon. We bought a photograph by Thomas Mengelsen (a noted photographer from the area) of the Grand Teton Mountains. We hung the picture in our hallway. It's a reminder of our honeymoon.
MnM182008
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
I know my FH got me a gift already ( I have no idea how or what because we are so broke because of this wedding). Now I have no idea what to get him,I know things I'd love to get him but financially I just don't think that is possible. I love the gesture of getting a memorable gift for one another the day of the wedding, but the wedding is so expensive. I think if you really want to get him a gift you should regardless if he gets you one. My FH had no idea the couple was supposed to exchange gifts until someone else told him. Men sometimes are just clueless about this.
Snick n Nick
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
We decided we would rather spend the money on a fun excursion on our Honeymoon than on buying gifts for each other for our wedding day. I did get DH boxer briefs embroidered with 'Mr. Lynch' to match my Mrs. Lynch undies to wear for the big day (left them in his hotel room for him to open in the morning), but that was it. Honestly I never really thought gifts that day were necessary....I kind of viewed it as us giving ourselves to each other--the biggest gift ever! Also our wedding bands are kind of that big sentimental gift to each other....JMHO though of course
dana1206
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
Posted by Calysta
I really wanted to do wedding presents as well. I always had this image of receiving some thoughtful, amazing gift from my FH. But now that I actually have an FH and are facing the financial realities of a wedding, I'm scrapping the idea.
It's not just the money thing, though. I adore my FH, but he's just not the grand gesture type. He does all of these small things day to day to let me know he cares, and I know he'll feel uncomfortable, stressed and pressured if he has to come up with 'the' gift on our wedding day. So, I've decided that it's one of those things I'm going to let go. Others may feel differently, of course!
Even though he's not going to do anything for me, I am doing a small gift for him. Starting December 4th of this year, I'm going to write daily in a journal about one thing I love about him. Then on our wedding day (or night before), I will give it to him so that he has a year long list of reasons I love him.
My FH is like that too. I'm glad you posted this because it made me realize that it's kind of unrealistic for me to expect him to get this great gift for me on our wedding and would put lots of pressure on him. I will probably get him something small, but we don't have the money to do anything crazy. I love the idea that the other girl posted about buying gifts on the honeymoon.
JenBill61210
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
Posted by Calysta
I really wanted to do wedding presents as well. I always had this image of receiving some thoughtful, amazing gift from my FH. But now that I actually have an FH and are facing the financial realities of a wedding, I'm scrapping the idea.
It's not just the money thing, though. I adore my FH, but he's just not the grand gesture type. He does all of these small things day to day to let me know he cares, and I know he'll feel uncomfortable, stressed and pressured if he has to come up with 'the' gift on our wedding day. So, I've decided that it's one of those things I'm going to let go. Others may feel differently, of course!
Even though he's not going to do anything for me, I am doing a small gift for him. Starting December 4th of this year, I'm going to write daily in a journal about one thing I love about him. Then on our wedding day (or night before), I will give it to him so that he has a year long list of reasons I love him.
that is the cutest idea ever!
pb2161
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RockysGirl
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i don't think Wedding Gifts to each other is essential. In fact, the whole concept is a little strange to me. I mean, if you're both paying for the wedding yourself (your parents aren't doing it all for you) then that's pretty much the gift already - your very expensive gift!! At least, that's the way i see it. Me & FH agreed that we'll see how our money situation is toward the end and that'll determine what we do.
I had just posted on this in the '08 boards about how i did end up getting him a little something a couple days ago for the honeymoon. Just a couple naughty little treats, which I know he'll love. lol. But I'm not expecting anything from him. We already bought each other our Wedding Bands. I don't expect much more. This wedding is really taking every last cent we have.
I like that idea of a love letter, but i know that most men don't like to write & express FEELINGS!! lol But if FH did that for me, I'd be one happy newly wed!!!
If he doesn't wanna do it tho, I wouldn't pressure him. Like Taryn said earlier - you guys could get each other a nice little keepsake from the honeymoon. Doesn't have to be at the actual wedding.
megsher
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I would love even just heartfelt card. I've seen great wedding pics of the bride reading a card from the groom while getting ready.
SFAR89
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Both FH and I agreed that we didn't want to spend any money on any gifts. Our gift will be the HM haha
I did buy him a cute set of cufflinks that are his style and I thought it would be nice to give to him to wear with his 'stuffy' suite so he can feel a little special. But that is all, I don't really expect anything. That is just how we want it.
I would tell him how you are feeling, tell him that you would like something b/c it will make you feel special. I am sure if you use the 'special' word it may melt his heart a little hehe. If not, don't let it really get to you that much. You guys will have plenty of time later on to get each other gifts after the wedding. If he is worried about budget, then maybe you can exchange gifts at a later date?
Brila09
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Re: Wedding Presents to Each Other
He wanted to buy me my DOJ, but I told him not to. I dont know if we're going to exchange gifts on our wedding day. The wedding is a gift to us already since we're paying for it ourselves.
