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WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

Mizzdimple Posted:

WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

So how does everyone feel about gift giving at weddings. Im not really thinking of it either way but I just want to get feedback..

I have a friend that actually calculated her wedding...to see how much each person should give to breakeven with the costs.

She was so angry at one of her guests because they gave her a vase and did not give her an envelope.

Its kind of an east coast thing that your supposed to give money at a wedding...
failurebydsign Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

thats a reason why i am not..or at least i think im not going to register..i dont want gifts and its gong to go word of mouth through our moms that we only want money

Espo22 Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

yeah i told FH and our parents to get over the fact that we will make money, i said be glad if we even break even and break even JUST for the RH, don't even think of the rest.

You can't have a wedding to expect to make a profit, but that is how alot of people look at it...It is not a guests fault how much you decide to spend pp at your RH and not their obligation to make up for it...yes many people will do this, i do it when i go to a wedding but you have to be understanding of those who won't do it
Mizzdimple Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

I plan on registering for my bridal shower...
Mizzdimple Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS


Posted by Espo22

yeah i told FH and our parents to get over the fact that we will make money, i said be glad if we even break even and break even JUST for the RH, don't even think of the rest.

You can't have a wedding to expect to make a profit, but that is how alot of people look at it...It is not a guests fault how much you decide to spend pp at your RH and not their obligation to make up for it...yes many people will do this, i do it when i go to a wedding but you have to be understanding of those who won't do it





FH was on this trip to like....make money on the wedding...but he saw the costs and said forget it! lol.........
beachbum05 Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS


Posted by Espo22

It is not a guests fault how much you decide to spend pp at your RH and not their obligation to make up for it...yes many people will do this, i do it when i go to a wedding but you have to be understanding of those who won't do it



I agree. It shouldnt be about 'making money'
dancinmyazoff Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

Believe me there are ALOT of people who use their weddings as a 'money making' party and losing face to what exactly it's for...yes it's true you will probably make a decent amount of money on your wedding BUT for the people who need to calculate before hand what people should give, etc. is just ridiculous.

Mizzdimple Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

well said!

MJDoc12 Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

omg....that's terrible!

honestly, we did get some gifts at our wedding...but i wanted them! one of my fellow LIW pals gave me some more formal china place settings....cause i really wanted them! otherwise we got $$

ppl who count on that reception money....i just don't get it. i'm a person who can't count on what i don't have. FH and i spent a good chunk of change on our wedding....but our families & friends aren't exactly well off. so we only got back about 1/3 or so of what we spent. and to be honest....i could care less if we got zero. our wedding was about the PARTY!!! the # of ppl who came up to us afterwards and said 'this was THE BEST wedding we've ever been to' and seeing the looking on their faces and knowing they were truthful....that was gift enough!
beachbum05 Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS


Posted by MJDoc12

omg....that's terrible!

honestly, we did get some gifts at our wedding...but i wanted them! one of my fellow LIW pals gave me some more formal china place settings....cause i really wanted them! otherwise we got $$

ppl who count on that reception money....i just don't get it. i'm a person who can't count on what i don't have. FH and i spent a good chunk of change on our wedding....but our families & friends aren't exactly well off. so we only got back about 1/3 or so of what we spent. and to be honest....i could care less if we got zero. our wedding was about the PARTY!!! the # of ppl who came up to us afterwards and said 'this was THE BEST wedding we've ever been to' and seeing the looking on their faces and knowing they were truthful....that was gift enough!



Amen and mazeltov!
Espo22 Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS


Posted by MJDoc12

omg....that's terrible!

honestly, we did get some gifts at our wedding...but i wanted them! one of my fellow LIW pals gave me some more formal china place settings....cause i really wanted them! otherwise we got $$

ppl who count on that reception money....i just don't get it. i'm a person who can't count on what i don't have. FH and i spent a good chunk of change on our wedding....but our families & friends aren't exactly well off. so we only got back about 1/3 or so of what we spent. and to be honest....i could care less if we got zero. our wedding was about the PARTY!!! the # of ppl who came up to us afterwards and said 'this was THE BEST wedding we've ever been to' and seeing the looking on their faces and knowing they were truthful....that was gift enough!



very well said
failurebydsign Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

thats true..were not paying for RH..so anything we get im sure will add up

MikeandJess Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

I think it was more of a money making thing back in the day when the parents would pay for it and all the gifts would go towards a down payment for a house. Now, since a lot of the time the bride and groom pay for things themselves it's more about the actual party! A lot of people on my side of the family don't have too much money and if they came and didn't bring a gift, I'd be ok with that too. I don't care if we make or lose money on this, I'm just so excited for it.

KickinDandelions Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

the only people that make money during a wedding are the vendors

FH and I are just happy to see our two families get together and share in our special day. We knew we wouldn't break even the moment he told me his family's guest list could be ~400 people. The only reason why I want to register is because some of the younger members of my family and friends have expressed that they'd feel uncomfortable just giving money.

GinaZ Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS


Posted by Mizzdimple

So how does everyone feel about gift giving at weddings. Im not really thinking of it either way but I just want to get feedback..

I have a friend that actually calculated her wedding...to see how much each person should give to breakeven with the costs.

She was so angry at one of her guests because they gave her a vase and did not give her an envelope.

Its kind of an east coast thing that your supposed to give money at a wedding...



I grew up in Maine and my family is all from Ohio, Seattle, Atlanta, and Chicago. My sister had a wedding in Maine this past summer- but she lives in NYC, and everyone except for my one grandpa and all the NY people gave presents and brought them to the wedding. Also, her now husbands family is all from NC, GA, VA (southerners) and also brought presents. I think it is a NY thing to give envelopes- a tradition I am more than happy to live with. :) But I am expecting all presents from my family, and FH's family will be giving the envelopes. I had been worried about having to have a gift table at my wedding, but I came to terms with it.
Princess Cut Bride Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS


Posted by KickinDandelions

the only people that make money during a wedding are the vendors




nifheim Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

If you give me anything i am happy as long as its either money or something on my registry or something useful. We are inviting people who are dirt poor and told them upfront (since they are friends) come here to be with us as friends and nothing else is needed to be given. FH and i may chip in a pay for the two couples hotel rooms if we have enough money.

Me and fh agree this is what we are spending and what we get back if any is not calculated or figured out its just what happens.
Collweenie21 Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

I agree, we are soooo not gonna 'make money' and don't expect to. And if we tally the gifts up ,and I'm out 5G's, well then hey, I paid only 5000 for the wedding of my dreams!

Soon2BMrsD Posted:

Re: WEDDING/ENGAGEMENT GIFTS

money is def. a longisland / new york think... i dont care what people give.. they dont even have to give me anytthing just come and have fun... of course it would be nice to make back the 30k i just shelled out but im not at all expecting it... that would be insane.. but if your going to get me a gift at least get something off the registry

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