What do I do:Spinoff: Thanks FILs

As you may have read, my FILs have caused MORE problems about food. And in the end (yes, I know this is VERY, VERY wrong), FH just said it would be easier to let them make the CH choices that we've got.

Anyway, next week is my final meeting at FH. I suspect that when FH asks about our choices, FILs will turn to me and say 'Robyn, what would you like?' But, I have a feeling that if I just say what I want, they'll complain to FH about it later.

So what do I do? Do I just say what I want and don't let them get a word in edge wise (which I know is how it SHOULD be) and just pray they don't cause a problem about it later or do I tell them that I don't care?

The truth is, after all the problems they've caused, I don't care that much anymore. Yes, I know this is unfair and not how it's supposed to me. It's MY wedding and I should have all the say - no brainer. But it's thrown in my face all the time that they are paying half. My father has a heart condition and has had to stay home from work twice b/c of major anxiety attacks FILs have caused. I don't want him to have another and if letting them make choices will eliminate that, well...then its worth it to me.

So...what do I do?

This is your wedding. When people help with the financial aspect of it... they are really giving you a gift, not making it THEIR wedding.

So... yes, voice your opinion and tell them what you want! You may compromise on some but it's is vastly your and FH's opinion that count.

Otherwise, they are robbing you from your own wedding.

You will deal with the concequences afterwards. It don't think at this point agreeing with them would make your life any easier.

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Posted by sr081906

This is your wedding. When people help with the financial aspect of it... they are really giving you a gift, not making it THEIR wedding.

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EXACTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Robyn - honestly from everything I've read about your FILs letting them select the food for CH will not give you the peace you so desperately seek. IMO, instead of complaining to FH later about your choices, they will give him an earful about how you don't care about your own wedding. I see this as a lose-lose situation, with the one and only potential upside being that YOU select the food that YOU and FH want to have at YOUR wedding.

Please don't give this away - you want to be able to eat food that YOU like the day of your wedding, and chances are food from the CH in the bridal suite will be it, so don't give in to them.