What do u do when......

fall2005bride Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:19 PM

What do u do when......

You just can't seem to get along with your FMIL and her husband and other family members??? I've tried at every attempt to be civil and to rectify the problem, but it NEVER works...
Is It even worth the energy? They haven't been nice or cooperative with me either, but I've tried because of my FH....

any feedback would be appreciated..

thx
Jess

AJsMommy122 Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:21 PM

Re: What do u do when......

grin and bare it... thank goodness I get along with my fmil 99% of the time... but theres always those times......
I just always try to show respect. Be the bigger person. Plus your FH doesnt need the stress

butterfly20 Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:23 PM

Re: What do u do when......

sometimes it just takes time... i think the most important thing is that youve tried alot already, maybe as they get closer to the wedding(and you officially becoming part of the family) they will warm up more?

bobbsbride Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:24 PM

Re: What do u do when......

Oh my god that is my life!! Eventually you will become so angry and then you will realize it is not worth the energy! My in laws to be are nothing but misreable people who want you to be also! If you need to talk to anyone (because some times the FH isn't the best to complain to about his family) FM me! I am going through the same things as you!!

fall2005bride Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:28 PM

Re: What do u do when......

bobbsbride-I may take you up on that! I have been with my FH for 7 years and we have 2 daughters together-so they are use to me and know me by now. I always take the extra step to be nice, but they have no Problem bad-mouthing me...
I guess it's a lose/lose situation!

nferrandi Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:29 PM

Re: What do u do when......

I have this problem with my FBIL's fiance. I've gotten to the point where I show her respect, but I don't go out of my way or even attempt to make things better. You can't continue setting yourself up for disappointment or you start to get really resentful. Just deal with it the best you can, but don't put yourself out there.

gaby25 Posted: Mar 23, 2004 05:35 PM

Re: What do u do when......

had to delete cause I know some people might come into this site just to be nosey!!!!
(I thought you had to be a member to look at boards but I was wrong )

2003fallwedding Posted: Mar 23, 2004 06:06 PM

Re: What do u do when......

I can understand. I am not always fond of my IL's. They drive me crazy most of the time. Its not easy, just have to deal with it.

deedee Posted: Mar 24, 2004 10:56 AM

Re: What do u do when......

The best thing that you can do is kill them with kindness.

jennelishal Posted: Mar 24, 2004 01:16 PM

Re: What do u do when......

Posted by bobbsbride

Oh my god that is my life!! Eventually you will become so angry and then you will realize it is not worth the energy! My in laws to be are nothing but misreable people who want you to be also! If you need to talk to anyone (because some times the FH isn't the best to complain to about his family) FM me! I am going through the same things as you!!

My life too and she is 100% right, you will get so angry and you will get over it. It's no use, my FIL's are the same. I try and try and I am tired. So I washed my hands. You don't need them. I mean it would be nice if everything was great but you have your fiance and you will start your own family and your own life.

Here's a hug.

Kriss2c Posted: Mar 24, 2004 01:28 PM

Re: What do u do when......

I could tell you stories about my FILs!!!!!!! Soap operas don't even dare to be this devious.

You get plenty of hugs from me and of course if you need to vent at all, feel free to FM me.

You are not alone.

btrflygrl Posted: Mar 24, 2004 01:29 PM

Re: What do u do when......

icks....I can tolerate my MIL....have you voiced your troubles to FH? Can he intervene and try to smotth it over at least until the wedding??? We'll be moving away soon, so my problems will be almost gone.

fall2005bride Posted: Mar 24, 2004 01:36 PM

Re: What do u do when......

I have spoken to FH about the situation and he's supposedly said something to them, but it does NO good! I dont think I ever did anything to them to cause this, but I'm tired of putting myself out there-for them to just shoot down every attempt.
it's making the wedding planning more of a hassle then an enjoyment, like it should be!

bobbsbride Posted: Mar 24, 2004 05:38 PM

Re: What do u do when......

I see I am not the only one and it makes me relieved to see that I have buddies in this. Fall2005bride, I have been with my FI for 6 and a half years, so I am in the same boat.

LIPrincess00 Posted: Mar 24, 2004 06:26 PM

Re: What do u do when......

I really thought I was the only one who didnt get along with the FIL's. I dont even try any more. To be honest, I just am civil to them in their own homes for my FI's and his daughters sake, but I could care less about them. When we move into our own house, they'll be lucky if I see them more than 2x a year.