What do you think of this...

I think it is acceptable. If they don't want kids at the wedding, that is their perogative. I only had 4 kids (all nieces and nephews) at my wedding of 100 guests and they were definitely noticable. For me, that was fine, but if they don't want it, I think it is their choice.

We did put 'adult reception to follow' on the invites too, b/c although we were having the 4 children, I had heard so many stories about people RSVPing or showing up with uninvited kids and we just didn't want to deal with that.

Well that happened in this scenario too. My FIL's brother responded 3 and my FSIL called to tell them that there were no children at the wedding. The wound up getting really upset because they NEVER leave their son with a baby sitter.
And the other family with a kid doesn't have that much money, so now on top of having to rent a tuxedo (it's a black tie affair) and give a gift, they also have to pay for a sitter. My IL's are paying for the sitter because they feel so bad about the whole thing.

I think that's terrible. I mean it's two kids - and they're not even close in age!!! I can see not wanting two 4 years olds runnign around...but a 10 year old could be very well behaved.

Maybe this is harsh to say, but if you choose to never leave your child with a sitter, which is certainly your choice as a parent, you may miss out on certain events. I understand that the parents could be nervous about who to leave their kids with, but why does that become the bride and groom's problem? People who were invited to our wedding who lived out of town with kids chose not to come instead of leaving their kids with a stranger or to leave them at home for a day or two while they were at the wedding.

Your inlaws are nice to offer to pay for the sitter. Will the parents take them up on it, or is going to become a family fued?

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Posted by usuk2004

a 10 year old could be very well behaved.

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You wouldn't have even know he was at my wedding. He just sat quietly with his parents all night.
And the 4 year old was a hoot on the dance floor. I could't have imagined my wedding without him and my FG (my niece.)

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Posted by dpli

Maybe this is harsh to say, but if you choose to never leave your child with a sitter, which is certainly your choice as a parent, you may miss out on certain events. I understand that the parents could be nervous about who to leave their kids with, but why does that become the bride and groom's problem? People who were invited to our wedding who lived out of town with kids chose not to come instead of leaving their kids with a stranger or to leave them at home for a day or two while they were at the wedding.

Your inlaws are nice to offer to pay for the sitter. Will the parents take them up on it, or is going to become a family fued?

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Oh trust me, I think it's really weird that they don't leave their 10 year old son with a sitter. But the fact of the matter is they're a little weird. It doesn't change the fact that that's the way they are and that's what they believe. It started a HUGE problem between my FIL and his brother and I just don't think it was worth it.

A lot of people don't want kids are their wedding.

You thought the little kid was hoot, but I am sure other people thought he was not.

If this is what they want, so be it.

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Posted by usuk2004

I think that's terrible. I mean it's two kids - and they're not even close in age!!! I can see not wanting two 4 years olds runnign around...but a 10 year old could be very well behaved.

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This is exactly what I was thinking, a 10 year old is fine I think...I get not wanting kids at the reception..and I guess I'm in the minority, because I would think a 4 year old to be too young to be welbehaved during a night reception....but a 10 year old is old enough.....

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Posted by dpli

Maybe this is harsh to say, but if you choose to never leave your child with a sitter, which is certainly your choice as a parent, you may miss out on certain events. I understand that the parents could be nervous about who to leave their kids with, but why does that become the bride and groom's problem? People who were invited to our wedding who lived out of town with kids chose not to come instead of leaving their kids with a stranger or to leave them at home for a day or two while they were at the wedding.

Your inlaws are nice to offer to pay for the sitter. Will the parents take them up on it, or is going to become a family fued?

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I two cousins like this....they don't leave thier kids with sitters, and I can't tell you what a pain in the @ss they have been....calling to ask if they could bring the kids to event when they weren't on the invitation, getting huffy when they can't.
I think it's important for children to be socialized with adults, and learn how to behave at family events, but I also think it's important to get them used to being with a sitter.

I think it's acceptible.

There are only 2 kids in my family. But, there are quite a few in DH's family. And, after that, what about the children of close friends, etc? If 2 are allowed to come, everyone else is going to jump up and down because they couldn't bring their child.

2 kids could turn out being 15 kids.

And, when DH's cousin got married, they had only 2 kids at the reception and they were OUT OF CONTROL. One was the ring bearer, the other was the 7 year old flower girl. The Bride and Groom had always known them to be great kids, but for some reason they were off the wall at the reception. Their mother was calling people on her cell phone, trying to find a sitter who could come and get them.

So, I completely agree with 'no kids' rules, no matter how small the amount.

NO i don't think it is rude or unacceptable..
It is their wedding...and if that is what they want...so be it.

I agree...I would have said no too.

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Posted by nferrandi

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Posted by usuk2004

a 10 year old could be very well behaved.

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You wouldn't have even know he was at my wedding. He just sat quietly with his parents all night.
And the 4 year old was a hoot on the dance floor. I could't have imagined my wedding without him and my FG (my niece.)

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AND THAT is the reason why i wouldn't want children at my wedding....
Parents having to 'sit with them all night'

I just got back from a wedding that had a 1 year old....
Parents looked MISERABLE

Not to mention the smelly dirty diaper some of us smelled