Ok... So my bridal shower is Saturday and obviously NOT a surprise. I REALLY didn't want a surprise... it's just not my thing, I've heard too many nightmare stories, and I wanted some control over the day.
ANYWAY...my FMIL has been telling people that the shower is a surprise bc she thinks it's weird that it's not....Even though I have make it clear from day 1 that I didn't want one!! (What is the surprise anyway... You REGISTER for your gifts and know you are having a shower?!?!)
So, the problem now is my arrival on the day of the shower... I want to be there at the start to greet guests...
She thinks I should come 30 min late...like I would if it was a surprise...
My mom thinks I should appease her!!! ***???
I do NOT want that awkward entrance...Am I crazy???
legalchef
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
when it is *actually* a surprise, i'd imagine that people build in that extra time at the beginning into the invitation and plans. if you show up half an hour late it might throw everything off!
maybe that explanation would help?
who is hosting the shower btw? because if it isn't your FMIL... then do what the host(s) wants.
Kelli218
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
Posted by legalchef
when it is *actually* a surprise, i'd imagine that people build in that extra time at the beginning into the invitation and plans. if you show up half an hour late it might throw everything off!
maybe that explanation would help?
who is hosting the shower btw? because if it isn't your FMIL... then do what the host(s) wants.
Well... my mother WAS paying for the shower herself (with bridesmaids helping to host, etc.)... at some point FMIL offered to help pay for the shower...
So on the invitation it said given by both my mother and his... So if I do what they want, I would have to walk in late....
BTW my bridesmaid think it makes no sense... when most of the people there know it isn't a surprise!
legalchef
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
Posted by Kelli218
Posted by legalchef
when it is *actually* a surprise, i'd imagine that people build in that extra time at the beginning into the invitation and plans. if you show up half an hour late it might throw everything off!
maybe that explanation would help?
who is hosting the shower btw? because if it isn't your FMIL... then do what the host(s) wants.
Well... my mother WAS paying for the shower herself (with bridesmaids helping to host, etc.)... at some point FMIL offered to help pay for the shower...
So on the invitation it said given by both my mother and his... So if I do what they want, I would have to walk in late....
BTW my bridesmaid think it makes no sense... when most of the people there know it isn't a surprise!
it's completely asinine! i say that you tell them (nicely) that you feel really strongly about it, that it is not a surprise and most people don't think it is one - the only people that do are those your FMIL told it was. you don't want to pretend it is one, you just want to be there and spend as much time with people as possible!
Tink1118
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
Mine wasn't a surprise and I absolutely did not want to walk in and have that big 'entrance'. However, my mom thought it would be weird if I was there setting up, greeting people when they walked in.
I ended up coming about 20 min late with 2 of my bridesmaids, so it just looked like we were traveling together.
HTH.
IrishAli
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
I greeted my guests. They all knew it wasn't a surprise
This day is about you and you should do what makes you happy!
Yankeeelove
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
Posted by IrishAli
I greeted my guests. They all knew it wasn't a surprise
This day is about you and you should do what makes you happy!
I agree, who cares what she wants. Its not her party, that day is all about you so you should do what makes you the happiest. She will get over it lol
pjc92980
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Re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? FMIL...UGH
its your day - do what you want! my shower was last weekend and it was not a surprise...i decided to show up 15 mins late anyway just so that i wasnt greeting people as i walked in and i was able to make an entrance. its totally up to you!
