What to do about the gap?

Now that I got everything straightened out with my date and the church and the hall, here's my dilemma:

Church time: 2:30 PM
Cocktail Hour: 8:00 PM

the drive from my church to the hall is roughly 15-20 minutes.

I am going back to check but I'm pretty damn sure my CH start time is not negotiable. The time with the church also non-negotiable as they have their evening mass at 5 PM.

What do I do? Some people can go home what about those that can't? What's a good in-between activity that I can indicate on invitations?

Is there a way that your hall can move up the CH start time a bit?

Or maybe you can give 'suggestions' of what to see in the area in the meantime in the invitation so they can kill a few hours?

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Posted by amandah75

Friends of ours had this issue and his parents gave everyone at the church an open invitation back to their house. Nothing crazy, they had simple refreshments and munchies. Many people often live close enough it's a non-issue and many do not even attend the church ceremony. It's not uncommon and the time between each will fly.

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My mom did the same thing for my brother's wedding. Although, they only had a little more than an hour between Church and the reception. (Church was 5:15, CH was at 8)

Joanne, being completely honest, that's a lot of time in between. That's almost a ten hour affair, I would see if you could get something moved up or down to at least minimize the time between the two. What worries me is that when some people see the time gap on the invitation, they may just decide to only attend the reception and not the ceremony, which s u c k s

ETA: Censorship s u c k s!

i wouldnt worry about it, just about EVERY single wedding i've been to there was a big gap

i had a big gap too and there was nothing i could do bc on saturdays at catholic churches they have mass so the latest for most churches you can have your ceremony is 3pm. They want you out of there and the church cleaned up before mass starts which is usually 5pm but they do confession before that i think

Every wedding ive attended unless the ceremony was at the RH, the church was around 2-something and ch started anywhere from 7-8pm(and some rhs you cant change the time bc if theres another wedding going on before yours it wont be possible). Most guests who have attended other weddings know this is the norm for many weddings. You'll see that most of your guests dont even come to the ceremony. Most of your family will and close friends. Others will just go to the reception. Ask past brides and you'll see just a percentage of guests actually go to ceremony.

Many ppl who do go to ceremony go dressed casually and then after they go home, relax and then change and head to reception. Every wedding ive attended most guests at the church are dressed casually. Even at my wedding that is what most guests who came to the ceremony did. Dont worry but guests will figure out on their own what to do. OOT guests can go back to the hotel and others can go home...many times a parent or close family member will invite ppl to their home after the ceremony for coffee and some food. Some RH's also welcome guests who are early. My rh had a lounge area for any guests that did come early and had drinks for them and some food, plus music.

All your guests who attend your ceremony will do what is most convenient for them and figure it out. Dh was a gm in a wedding that was in LI(i live in queens) so after ceremony they bridal party went to take pics, so while DH did this i decided with the gap in between to go and get my hair and make up done. Others just went home, of course this depends on where they live. You dont have to figure out a plan for them. MANY brides worry about this at first, you always see posts on LIW with girls worried about such a big gap and then they realize its the norm and feel better about this when they talk to others and realize they dont have to be the ones making accomodations for their guests. Ive always dealt with it for other weddings and people will do the same for yours

dont worry about it being a long day. Mine was a very long day. I was up from 10am getting ready, ceremony at 2:30pm, then took pics for over 2 hours in 2 separate locations. Went to the rh and got there 30 mins before CH so had some time to relax, reception ended at 1:30am, limo picked us up at 2am and we got to the hotel around 2:30am or even later. I had so much adrenaline that day and even when i got to the hotel i wasnt tired and still full of energy and stayed up until 4am or later

you'll be fine, dont worry about it

I am going to my RH tomorrow to see if I can shorten the gap a teensy bit OR to see if they'll open up a hospitality station... I wasn't able to do it with my original wedding date, but may be able to do it now.

Most of my guests live close enough to home or will be OOT guests with a hotel room

Alesia, as much as I'd like everyone to come to the ceremony I'd understand if they didn't, or couldn't. The ceremony is important but it's much more intimate for me... so having a small number of people there wouldn't be so bad.

I'm not worried about being tired either. I imagine wedding days are one of those days where you're energized the whole time.

Thanks everyone for all your advice!! I really appreciate it.