What would you do?

If your in laws to be are not offering any money and may not even offer a gift... and yet they want to see the guest list... would you show them the entire list (including your guests and your parent's that are contributing a small amount)... or would you just offer to show them your FH's friend's and family/their side?

I'm thinking about offering the latter... I don't think they should have as much say as my parent's if there's a chance they won't even offer a gift (they didn't give FH a gift for his first marriage - granted they knew it wouldn't last, but still - who does that?).

I'm not a money factory here!

I wouldn't mind showing them the guest list at all. Where I would have an issue is if they wanted to invite X amount of people or say something about your guest list. At that point, I would have to put my foot down and let them know that it's yours and FH's decision.

JMHO

I would show them the list if they wanted to see it. If they dare to add more then what is listed, I might suggest that they make a contribution to help make them possible.

I think I would just show them their side of the guest list. Theres no need for them to see the whole guest list on your side, if that not ofering to pay for anything.
If they suggest you invite more people on their side, have them put in their own money towards it, if they have alot more people they insist be invited.
Just like after the wedding, my MIL wanted to see a list of the gifts we got...Theres no need for us to see what MY side gave...! JMO!

I agree with all the replies... at least my parent's are covering the people they insist on having. I've heard nothing from his about any financial contribution. If they ask to invite more, I'm just going to say we are already over budget so I can't afford to add anyone... at most I'll offer them a B-list and explain that if someone from HIS side replies no, then we can add someone else in. If my side replies no, I already have a B list of people I would love to add but can't unless someone else says no. I won't tell them that last part about my no's, but it's in my head.

Thanks gals!

I'm with ya, but it's to keep FH quiet. Maybe they will surprise us with a gift? who knows...

Again, if prompted to add - I'll mention that we are over budget at this point, but contributions are welcome if it's that important.

Considering at his brothers there was a total of 50 guests from both sides, I don't think anyone should complain... today the list I sent her contains about 30 entries... most of them have a guest or spouse - that's 60 from his side alone... and I wanted to keep the entire guest list to about 100, but I knew we'd send out about 150, hoping that only 100 show. I mean, I don't want to go lower than I guaranteed, but I have friends and family too. I just agree also that if they aren't helping with the exuberant cost, then what needs to be seen? FH said 'she just wants to help'... so I told him, just let her know that adding people will not be 'helping'.