What would you do......? (edited)

hugs213 Posted: Jul 11, 2003 06:54 PM

What would you do......? (edited)

I deleted the post just in case someone I know was on here. Thank you for all your support and advice

mishandgerard Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:09 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

As much as I despise cheating, this has some extenuating circumstances. I believe a person needs to do what makes them happy. If they don't it can lead to depression. I am not fond of divorce, but your mother sounds like she is miserable and I really do not blame her.

hugs and kisses to both of you

daisybride Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:10 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

Wow. That is such a tough situation. If she is not happy she shold not stay, but you should NOT be the one to make that decision. He is still your dad. I would just let her know that you support whatever choice she makes. I am sorry that you have to go through this!

yabbobay Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:13 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

Is she not interested in a divorce? or a separation?

Its a tough situation...

Marcela1654 Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:18 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

Wow, this is a VERY tough situation. I think you should tell her that you love her but cannot make this decision for her. Like daisybride said, he's still your father and it's not fair for you to be put in the middle.
Would she ever consider separation/divorce?

Good Luck

hugs213 Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:24 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

No because she really thinks that he is unable to take care of himself and she feels bad for him. He needs someone to take care of him. My father is not mean or has ever mistreating my mom, it's just that he does not need any human contact whatsoever.

nrvbrd Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:53 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

I think your mom deserves to be happy- but I do NOT advocate cheating. If it has to get to that point you should leave.

As you said it has been a loveless marriage. The obvious solution is for both of your parents to go their separate ways- but will that happen? - probably not.

WithThisRing Posted: Jul 11, 2003 07:57 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

I dont know what to say but wanted to give you lots of hugs

MarcellaBella Posted: Jul 11, 2003 08:05 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

to you girl!!

I can't really comment considering that my sister just found out that her ex bf just got married last year, arranged marriage and 2 months after he broke it off with her.. he broke up with her over religion..

good luck to you babe.!

MrsTC Posted: Jul 11, 2003 08:07 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

i am not a fan of cheating, however I am a firm believer in having one life to live and to love....and she deserves to be happy.

Lunatrek Posted: Jul 11, 2003 08:09 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

You only live once. I say your mom should pursue the love she has found... it must be very difficult, but my opinion says that she should trust her heart.

My love to you both!

Wendy Posted: Jul 11, 2003 08:55 PM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

I am sorry to hear that you are being put in this position. I don't agree with your mom asking for your blessing, since she has now put you in the middle between her and your dad. It seems like she wants you to make her decision for her, which is wrong.

If this were me I would tell her that while I love her very much she has put me in a difficult situation and that I cannot give her my blessing nor do I want to hear any more about it. That takes you out of the middle and puts the decision back on her shoulders which is were it belongs. She is being completely unfair to you by asking you for absolution for what she wants to do.

I am not passing judgement on the affair, just on her including you in her deception. I understand why she wants to do this, but asking you to approve is akin to making you a participant. If you don't know anything about it, you won't be tortured over it.

This is a tough one.

Jen2704 Posted: Jul 12, 2003 01:59 AM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

Wow that is difficult and complicated! Honestly, your mom needs to make that decision for herself....she has to look within herself and decide what is best for her and what she needs in order to be happy. She has to look at the pros and cons and then make a decision. I would just be there for her and support her. I never agree with cheating but I can understand where she is coming from. I wish you the best of luck!!!

2003OCT10 Posted: Jul 12, 2003 02:09 AM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

Tell her to listen to her heart. Good Luck.

dubliner Posted: Jul 12, 2003 07:17 AM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

I've read some of the responses and I kind of agree with them all - however I think your mom needs to make these decisions for herself

oops forgot the

michele31 Posted: Jul 12, 2003 07:24 AM

Re: What would you do if your mom asked your permission to have an affair?(long)

In all honestly it is time for your mother to make a life for herself and leave your father. An affair is not , IMO, the answer to her problems. Her problem is a loveless, lifeless marriage. I do not condon cheating as I think she has another option first, divorce.
But, as their child, you should NOT be involved in this process. She is a grown women and needs to figure this out for herself. You should not give her an answer,as it is unfair to both you and your father.