What would you do if you invited more people than your room can hold?

So I am kind of in a rut right now. When we booked JT, we did not think we would be able to meet the 160 minimum but low and behold, our list is up to 250 invites. I understand that some people will cancel but I was told by JT that my room can only hold 210 maximum. As I go over the list, I can say that there may be about 20 definite no's that I know of right now.

I have a lot of family and I also invited a lot of friends. Obviously, I am thinking that my friends will be the ones who I will have to be removed from the list and I will nto invite my bosses. BUT, how do you do this after you sent your friends save the dates? I feel like an arse that I have to do this!

Would you do what I mentioned above or would you send out your definite invites 10 weeks rather than 8 weeks to the people you are definitely inviting and hopefully get RSVP's back and see from there how many no's you get and then make the decision about un-inviting some guests and if there are enough no's then send out the other invites?

I hope I did not confuse you all b/c I know I can sound confusing.

Thanks in advance!

Not to worry, you should be fine!! About 15-20% will decline, so that will be perfect for that room!!

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Posted by cindyandkevin

Not to worry, you should be fine!! About 15-20% will decline, so that will be perfect for that room!!

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yea, you will be fine. Def don't not invite somebody if you have already sent them a STD

Trish - First of all I know how stressful this must be!

Second, try to take a deep breath and relax.

Now... Did you send STDs to all 250 people?

If not, first take off the list all those who did not receive save the date cards.

Next, did your STDs mention 'guests' - ? Usually they do not. Assuming they don't, remember that not all single people will bring a date. You could go so far as to not invite super-single people with a date, providing they don't know anyone at the wedding. Another option would be to explain the situation to close single friends who are invited with a date and ask that they consider not bringing someone (since they know you're over your limit in that room).

Finally, remember that usualy 15-20% of people usually say no. It's pretty rare that everyone (including all guests) or nearly everyone attends. I'd imagine that percentage would be even higher with a larger guest list. I'd think if you invite 250, maybe 200 will come. I wouldn't freak out too much -- it's highly unlikely that you'll be way over the limit!

Is it possible to have the entire room for your reception and use a different JT room as your CH room? I know you're using half this room for the CH and half for the reception... but could you use a different room for the CH and the entire room for the reception?

I am sending out 240 invites and our places maxes out at 220. I am confident that I will receive 20 no's at this point.

I only sent STD's to OOT people but I would try to make your list a little smaller. Maybe don't invite singles with guests or have an A and B list.

I agree with the last two posters...

Send the invites out early and don't rely on 'nos' I have only gotten 3 nos. We invited 10 more people than the venue can hold. Yikes.

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Posted by laural2979

I'm not sure that I understand. Did you send out STDs to all 250 people? It's really rude to send someone a STD and then not invite them to the wedding. Can you switch to a larger room at JT instead?

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No, I did not send out save the dates to all 250 people. I sent them out to my friends and FH's family and most of my family.

I did not send FH's friends save the dates as he took forever to get to me with their addresses but he did verbally tell them they are invited.

Yes, I agree with you that it is rude to send out STD's and then pull back on it. No, I cannot switch to a larger room b/c they are all booked that night. I already asked.

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Posted by Kara and Todd

Trish - First of all I know how stressful this must be!

Second, try to take a deep breath and relax.

Now... Did you send STDs to all 250 people?

If not, first take off the list all those who did not receive save the date cards.

Next, did your STDs mention 'guests' - ? Usually they do not. Assuming they don't, remember that not all single people will bring a date. You could go so far as to not invite super-single people with a date, providing they don't know anyone at the wedding. Another option would be to explain the situation to close single friends who are invited with a date and ask that they consider not bringing someone (since they know you're over your limit in that room).

Finally, remember that usualy 15-20% of people usually say no. It's pretty rare that everyone (including all guests) or nearly everyone attends. I'd imagine that percentage would be even higher with a larger guest list. I'd think if you invite 250, maybe 200 will come. I wouldn't freak out too much -- it's highly unlikely that you'll be way over the limit!

Is it possible to have the entire room for your reception and use a different JT room as your CH room? I know you're using half this room for the CH and half for the reception... but could you use a different room for the CH and the entire room for the reception?

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Hi Kara, no, I did not send save the dates to 250 guests but I did send them to most of my friends and families. BUT, they did not say with guest.

I feel that anyone who is over the age of 20 should be invited with a guest as I know I would be upset if someone had not invited me with a guest at that age. Also, most of my friends are married as I am in my 30's.

I called JT earlier today to see if we could use another room for cocktail hour and they said no b/c the room that they use when the divider is not up is already booked. The BM said what they can do if it comes down to it is use the 1/2 of the room for cocktail hour, as planned but make the guests wait in the lobby for 15 minutes so they can clean up and set that part of the room up and take the divider down. If I were a gust though, I would not want to wait in a lobby for 15 minutes. I personally think that's terrible. I am hoping for like 50 cancellations.

Thanks for the help.

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Posted by faithandkevin

Be careful though when calculating no's- I thought for sure some of the people on my list would say no, and they all said yes so far! And I'm only waiting for 21 more!!

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This is what I am petrified of happening! I know everyone says to calculate 15 - 20% of people not showing but you seroiusly never know!

Send them all out now. You'll be fine. People you thought would come may not be able to make it.
It happens to everyone!

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Posted by Trishthedish

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Posted by faithandkevin

Be careful though when calculating no's- I thought for sure some of the people on my list would say no, and they all said yes so far! And I'm only waiting for 21 more!!

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This is what I am petrified of happening! I know everyone says to calculate 15 - 20% of people not showing but you seroiusly never know!

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You really don't. I'm shocked by it, honestly. I'm hoping for a couple of no's!!

Well I just found out that my mom sent out the shower invites so I can definitely not un-invite anyone on that list which I was hoping for.

If the one girl I was really not planning on inviting to the shower (last minute) or wedding which has already been invited, (co-worker) that I am really not speaking to too much anymore does not show up at the shower, does that mean it is okay to not send her a wedding invite? I understand if she gives me a gift, then i would have to invite her.

Thanks.