and if so are any guidelines set for having them..
I mean if they call the house do they speak to you and FH or is the friendship simply yours only?
eroxgirl
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I used to have many...now only 1. When he (rarely) calls the house, he always says whats up to Eric but they NEVER have conversations...FH is horribly jealous of him (him, my friend - tall, good looking, fireman and the only man who knows me as well as FH does, just not in the biblical sense )
Scoop
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Member since
Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I have many guy friends....my brother & I are only a year a part and we grew up with the same circle of friends both guys & girls.
My husband is very outgoing and fit right in with them when we first met....besides most of my guy friends are either married or in serious relationships plus I never dated any of them, so he doesn't care.
They now call him more than me.....hehehehhee.
nrvbrd
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I do have one person of the opposite sex who is one of my closest friends. We have been friends for 14 years. Strictly platonic, though there may have been those 'what if' questions but nothing ever materialized.
This guy is like the brother I never had. He has been a good friend to me. FH knows him and has hung out with him. He is not at all threatned by him because I do not give him a reason to be.
This guy has a girlfriend so it is all good.
Opposite sex friendships are a very delicate situation. Their has to be respectful boundaries and you each party involved must be respectful of their relationships.
DrmnBlnd
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I have the same situation as erox- my FH is horrible jealous of my friend. Do they realize that they have nothing to worry about?
Ronnie&Theresa
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
Here is my deal..
Ron use to have and yes I say USE to have alot of female friends. But that ended quicky once we moved in together..
Anyway..He had one close Gf that he was friends with for yrs and she was there for him through the hardest time in his life. He wants her to be a part of our celebrations. and it was YES my idea Yes MY idea to call her.
He called her.. She hasn't called back.
But I want to tell him first off .. She is welcome to the e party. the shower the wedding..
She is not about to call my house saying.. Hi is Ron there.. She is not to say lets go out Ron..
Get my point..
Those days are OVER and Ron and I are as one now..
How do I get this point across with out looking like the BAD guy!
eroxgirl
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
Meanwhile my friend is engaged and getting married exactly 1 week before us...its so sad. Just because I dated this guy for a month when I was 16 - it was so not a relationship, just a pair of kids going to the movies a few times. Whatever, I don't entertain the nonesense!
eroxgirl
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I have a simple policy...FH's gym partner is a woman so I was like, I have to meet her, I have to talk to her and if she calls, she has to call MY house and talk to me...no sneaky b.s. behind my back. I met her and told her all of this...nevermind that I can see she's not his type, I let her know where I stand and she totally respects it. You're not a bad guy for setting up ground rules, its what your supposed to do.
Becky
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I can understand how you wouldn't want some chick sneaking around and calling your house when she knows you are gone or only calling on his cell phone. That is sketchy.
But what is the problem with her calling your house and saying hello to you if you answer, but calling to speak with him? I have some very close guy friends from law school and one from high school. Keith knows all of them. Sometimes I call them, sometimes they call me. I would NEVER let Keith dictate to me who I can be friends with and on what terms.
But everyone's situation is different, so it is hard to really answer your question. When Keith and I met I had a few female friends and a ton of guy friends. I was like Elaine from Seinfeld. None of those guys were people I dated, or ever thought about dating. Just friends. Actually when we met I had a male roomate and he had a female roomate! So our relationship has always involved opposite sex friends. Also, Keith has never expressed displeasure over my guy friends and he really likes some of them.
What makes you uncomfortable about this girl. Do you think she still has feelings for Ron?
Betty
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I always had MOSTLY guy friends but now that we've gotten older I don't really speak to them anymore (they are all married now and when they got GFs they didn't like them being friends with the girls )
Anyway, I still speak to a few of them but not regularly..only one of them b/c now I'm good friends with his wife
edited to say: I would not be comfortable with FH keeping close contact with an ex. Stupid I know but thats how I feel. I don't think you would be the bad guy.
Ronnie&Theresa
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
She hasn't seen or heard from Ron in 3yrs and she is more like the Guys girl friend if you get my point. She isn't like that .. He told me when he explained her. She likes to run and play ball with the guys type of girl. Where I am Barbie.. U get it?
Ron and I share the cell, and he is honest. He isn't like that. He is open.
I just want HER to know what the deal is.
But we have to even wait to see if she calls back!
dkga1026
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
Maybe you can wait and see how things go before you say anything to her. If she calls about the party and then doesn't really call anymore to hang out, etc. then you don't have a problem. But if her calling gets out of hand then you can say 'I don't mind that you and Ronnie are friends, but since we are engaged now there are limits to your relationship with him'. I don't know, hope this helps!
Fletch
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
I agreee with Becky. As long as she knows the deal I would let her call my house as long as she was never rude to me. I actually speak to a few old boyfriends often and FH has one really good girl friend. He has gone out with her alone and I have with my guy friends. Neither of us mind at all. If we both can make it to have dinner with them we do but if we can't thats not a big deal at all. I didn't want to give up any friends when we got together and I didn't expect him to either.
angeleyes
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Member since
Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
We both have friends of both genders - most of them are couples...one of our couple friends unfortunately is going thru a divorce so we've decided to remain friends w/the husband (the wife cheated on him and was pretty bad so we don't care to remain friends w/her)
anyway wherever i go he goes too - if I go out w/a girlfriend unless we are both friends w/her I go alone but make sure to call him often so he knows I love him
he hangs w/his guy friends alot but always text messages me or calls
even w/all the trust it helps if you have your separate time to still check in w/each other
nrvbrd
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
Theresa do not jump the gun just yet.
You could be stressing about nothing.
Wait until she calls back , then if she continues calling and you see that she is not being respoectful of your relationship, then you speak to ron and tell him how you feel.
heidla
Posted:
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Re: Who has friends of the opposite sex?
David's best friend is an ex-girlfriend(from High School). I have a lot of friends that are male and he has a lot of female friends. It really doesn't bother either of us probably because we have met most of each others friends.
