Is it JUST the bride's mom with help from the BM's, or is the groom's mom supposed to help? Do we ask the groom's mom for a guest list? Do we give her a maximum amount of people she can invite? Do we ask her to help financially? My mom wants to know...lolol. I'm the first one getting married and her only daughter and she has NO CLUE (me neither) of bridal shower etiquette....
I know these days anything goes, but she's curious about etiquette, who to invite from groom's family, etc etc.....since she is the one throwing the shower (not for a while, though)
brideinapril
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
It depends on his mom - My mom threw my bridal shower - asked for help and a list from his mom. She got a list, but sadly no help!!!
november12003
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
For mine, my bridal party and my mom planned it. It was paid for by my bridal party. They asked my MIL for a list of people, but other than that, she wasn't really involved. Everyone will give you different answers, but I think it's whatever works best for your group of people.
Sweetness
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
shhh I figured out when mine is... But my mom is heading it, FMIL is helping as well as all my bridesmaids, except one who is in CT with me..
They used the list from my wedding and invited all woman close to the family-no OOT and work people from CT..so far that's all I know..Besides the when, where...
bellepoque
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
One of the etiquette book's that my mom gave me said the following:
The bridal showers are usually thrown by the maid/matron of honor or a close family friend. The shower is usually not hosed by anyone in the family. Immediate family, close friends, members of the bridal party and close family members are usually invited. Everyone invited to the bridal shower must be invited to the wedding.
The shower can be formal or informal.
Nowhere does it say if anything about the grooms family or his mother. It is definitely a good jesture to invite your FH's mother and members of his family, but I don't think you would etiquette wise ask her to provide a guest list for the shower, unless your mothers are close friends and share acquaintences, nor contribute financially. With that said, 3/4 of the etiquette books I have read have also said all of these dos or don't and then at the end had a caveat like, 'But, nowadays....'
Hope this helps you. Good luck!
tina_cuse01
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
It definately depends on the FMIL. My sister is planning the shower and my mom is paying for it. My BMs have offered to help with the planning. But his mom hasn't done anything (except complain).
nov04LIbride
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
Posted by bellepoque
One of the etiquette book's that my mom gave me said the following:
The bridal showers are usually thrown by the maid/matron of honor or a close family friend. The shower is usually not hosed by anyone in the family. Immediate family, close friends, members of the bridal party and close family members are usually invited. Everyone invited to the bridal shower must be invited to the wedding.
I heard that too--my mom really felt she shouldn't throw it, since all the etiquette books say family members shouldn't since it is kind of a request for gifts...My FMIL is throwing mine...
2003OCT10
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Re: Who is in charge of the Bridal Shower?
Technically its supposed to be on the shoulders of your maid or matron of honour... and usually the MOthe Bride helps out, and now-a-days if the mother of the groom wants to help they do too...
