I'm close to the one year mark to our wedding (hollyyyy guacamole!) We are starting to think about our Save The Dates now. I have a question as to who to send them to. Their are the obvious people we are going to invite; very clothes friends, family, co-workers. However their are a bunch of friends we are not 100% on. We have a very large group of friends that we have known many years and we are having a hard time deciding who we will invite and who we wont invite. Is it ok to not send someone a Save The Date, and then still invite them to the wedding? Is it bad for some people to see that they didn't get a save the date when others did?
Thanks for the help!
sjr385
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Jill52787
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
Its definitely OK to send the STD only to people who are 100% no question about it on the guest list. I think thats actually the norm. Its worse to send them an STD and then change your mind, and be stuck with them! We are just sending to family and close friends. No work friends or 'iffy' guests.
mara1017
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
We are going through our list now about save the dates. We are only sending them out to family and close friends that are absolutely going to be invited. We are not sending them to anyone from work for a few reasons...Who knows it the people you are working with now will be there in a year and also FH is a cop and if we send STD to them they will be plastered around the precinct!
You can absolutely invite someone to the wedding who you do not send a STD. Once you send a STD you pretty much have to invite to the wedding!.
FutureMrsCat050412
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
we gave out our stds at our eparty & when we hit our 1 yr mark we will be sending them out to A-LIST people only!
chliekm
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
Posted by FutureMrsCat050412
we gave out our stds at our eparty & when we hit our 1 yr mark we will be sending them out to A-LIST people only!
We did those invited to the eparty and then a few other must invites.. no coworkers and only the CLOSEST friends who would def be invited.
wishingwell1230
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
We are also handing out STDs at the e-party and then sending them out to the rest of our close friends/family. Definitely A list only!
FutureMrsGTL
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
We are only sending them to the people we are 100% sure we are inviting.
StephanieJoy
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
we are sending to those out or town who we are going to deff invite. it we have enought after that we will send to the locals
LaBellaVita7712
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
I don't think I am going to do std's. I'm too nervous about sending someone one that I don't want to end up inviting.
gf1025
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
We're a bit worried about Save the Date cards too!. Since our families are so big we don't want to insult anyone. But it's almost like we should just send them to everyone in the family because some of my cousins, for example, would be offended for sure! But I can't and won't invite all of them!!! I have close to 80 cousins!!!!! So we're close to the one year mark and don't even know if we'll do Save the date cards outside of Grandma, Aunts, Uncles and close-close friends!
HSsweethearts
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
From experience I would tell you to be VERY conservative when it comes to save the dates.
If I could do it all over again I would ONLY send it to family and very close friends (like bridal party, lifelong friends close). No neighbors, no co-workers, etc.
You have 9-10 months until your invitations go out and a LOT can change in that time. I sent STDs to people and when it came to invitations I really felt stuck.
If you keep the STD list small then it's really not a problem if some people got them and some people didn't because 1) most people don't even expect them 2) they'll understand if you limited it only to family and/or OOT guests
ETA: Absolutely do NOT send to co-workers. At my job for example, there have been so many changes I could not have anticipated and people I used to sit next to I never even see. Had I sent STDs I'd be stuck inviting people I no longer talk to just bc of circumstance.
irisheyezrsmilen
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
I think we are planning on send to family, close friends and people who live far enough way that we know are 100% going.
I was also told that the STD's are a good time to clarify 'who' is invited, ex if there are children and you plan on a adult only wedding. so make sure you state the names so there are no mix ups and unwanted +1's when its time for the invites
jenclifwed
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
thanks for the advice girls! I think after talking to you guys i will be extra careful as to who gets the Save the Dates! better safe then sorry!
mjm2012
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
I'm definitely only sending out my STD's to family and close friends.
You are my date twin! I'm curious, when are you planning to send your STD's out? I was thinking Aug/Sep and would love to get an idea if that's when you are thinking too or if you are thinking earlier/later.
Watermelon5
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Re: Who to send the Save The Dates to?
ditto to what everyone else said - be conservative and only send them to ppl 100% invited! i prob wouldnt send them to any of the friends you are unsure of OR the ones you are if they run in the same circles so as to spare feelings lol! HTH!
