Wierd e-party

kbeana24 Posted: Jun 21, 2004 09:29 AM

Wierd e-party

This weekend was my e-party. My dad and his long-time girlfriend threw it in the backyard of their summer house. ALL my dads family came, and my fi's immediate family came (parents & grandparents). This was the first time they had all met, so I was scared noone would talk to each other, or that they wouldnt get along or something. But it all went really well, everyone got along and it was all good. The weather was beautiful, all the food came out good, super.
The only thing was, I thought fi and I would be getting presents. I dont want to sound selfish or anything, but isnt that whats done at an e party??? I have a gift registry....Whats the deal??
I really am happy that everyone liked each other, and that is in the long more important .
Is this horrible of me that I feel a tiny bit disappointed?

nov04LIbride Posted: Jun 21, 2004 09:36 AM

Re: Wierd e-party

If it was just family, I would consider it more of a meeting of the two sides (my mother took my FI's family out to dinner the week after we got engaged to meet for the first time). A party would generally entail friends, etc., not just the close family. There will be plenty of time for presents with showers and everything, I wouldn't be bitter. More important that they get along than that you get another blender.

FLaCaTaCa Posted: Jun 21, 2004 09:43 AM

Re: Wierd e-party

Our e-party was pretty much very informal so we didn't get gifts. Some people did bring cards and we got little things....books, magazines, charms...stuff like that but for the most part...no gifts. I was just glad everyone met to be honest.

nferrandi Posted: Jun 21, 2004 11:05 AM

Re: Wierd e-party

Honestly, I think I would be disappointed too. My e-party was very casual and we got gifts or cards from everyone who attended. I know it's not much of a consolation, but think about the families meeting and getting along as your gift. That's the stuff that's really important.

Kriss2c Posted: Jun 21, 2004 11:16 AM

Re: Wierd e-party

Traditionally, the only required 'gift-givers' at the E-party are the bridal party. However, recently it has become the custom that all attendants give a small gift.

halloweenbride04 Posted: Jun 21, 2004 11:21 AM

Re: Wierd e-party

I think it is customary for people to bring gifts, but quite honestly I think the etiquette books say that guests do not need to bring gifts.

We made out like bandits on our e-party. My poor brother did not at his e-partythough, our family gave them gifts, her family did not, not even a congratulatory card! I think alot has to do with formality though. Ours was catered in a hall with a DJ and we had 75 people. His was in a pavillion of a state park, BBQ style with about 30 people.

Who knows....but I'd be disappointed too. Sorry!

sophie78 Posted: Jun 21, 2004 11:28 AM

Re: Wierd e-party

Actually, guests are not required to give gifts for an engagement party. Maybe th einvite told them not to also.

I did not have an e-party. But I did get some small gifts. I got toasting flutes, two champagne glasses, cake knife, and about $500. But for the most part, I did not get anything.

Nessa79 Posted: Jun 21, 2004 03:48 PM

Re: Wierd e-party

etiquette says no gifts at an e party, and immediate families really just thought they wanted to get together and meet each other. I got a few gifts, but just some cute wedding stuff, we had not yet registered!

kathy2176 Posted: Jun 21, 2004 03:54 PM

Re: Wierd e-party

think alot has to do with formality though. Ours was catered in a hall with a DJ and we had 75 people. His was in a pavillion of a state park, BBQ style with about 30 people.

I don't think that is true. I had a backyard BBQ with about 40-45 people (family only). We sent out e-party invites indicating the pool was open and bring your bathing suit. We still made out quite well. Almost every guest gave us a card with money and the ones who didn't, gave a gift. I think it depends more on the family and if they knew it was an e-party or were told it was just a 'meet the family' kind of thing. Like someone else said, don't worry, you have plenty of opportunity for presents!!

kbeana24 Posted: Jun 21, 2004 06:02 PM

Re: Wierd e-party

To give a better description of the day, it was very informal, backyard BBQ. No invitations, just work of mouth. About 25 close family members came. A cousin gave us a gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond. Noone else even brought a card. It was more of a Meeting of the Families. But we have been engaged for more than a year and have registries at 3 stores (BB& Bey is one of them). After reading some of the other e party reviews, I just got a little bummed. Thanks for not thinking Im some selfish wench.

palebride Posted: Jun 21, 2004 06:04 PM

Re: Wierd e-party

we had a backyard e-party, just family and the wedding party - designed so everyone could meet each otther - not even called an e-party...but that's what it turned into and we were surprised by tons of gifts! we weren't planning on anything - but people went crazy!

dm24angel Posted: Jun 21, 2004 07:03 PM

Re: Wierd e-party

We decided not to have an E-party for the reason of our families already knew each other and we didnt want people thinking it was just a gift event, we got a few things from close family without the party, I personally am against the gift thing and would have felt awkward if we had gotten more...