LIWeddings.com
Post New Topic

Would This Bother You

kimNanthony Posted:

Would This Bother You

MsPotterhead Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

I would be upset too. However, are you sure its that they don't have time, or is it possible that they are afraid of public speaking, or that they are afraid they'll cry, or something like that?
Not having time doesn't seem like a real excuse.
kristi313 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

some people just don't feel comfortable speaking in public. or maybe they don't like being the center of attention even if it's only for 5 mins.

i understand why you are hurt, but i would just make another game plan
kimNanthony Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

Definitely not afraid of public speaking. They are both very comfortable with that so it must be something else
kate0211 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

aww im sorry that they hurt your feelings!!! i would definitely be bothered and upset by that situation. like you said - it's not a 'speech' per se...but a short toast. maybe you can ask again and explain that it's really important to you and FH that they do it??? i hope it works out :)

krisa1129 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

I opted not to do a speech at my sister's wedding because I would have been nervous the whole wedding leading up to that point. I was also 19 years old, but she respected my reasons. Maybe they don't realize how important it is to you?

Gigi08 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

Could it be they don't feel comfortable and are afraid of that being too emotional? I think it may be emotional enough having them walk you down the aisle, but speaking in front of everyone may be too much for them. You know your brother's best. It sounds like they may be making excuses not to admit how hard it would be for them. Maybe they don't handle showing their emotions well? A lot of people are like that so they try to avoid the situation.

Me personally, I know not having my father there is going to be hard enough. I have no intention of having a dance with my brother because I know I will not be able to handle it. My brother will have to understand that. I don't want to be a mess that night.

How did you leave off with them when you said you were hurt?
kimNanthony Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

Posted by Gigi08

Could it be they don't feel comfortable and are afraid of that being too emotional? I think it will be emotional enough having the special dance with them, but speaking in front of everyone may be too much for them. You know your brother's best. It sounds like they may be making excuses not to admit how hard it would be for them. Maybe they don't handle showing their emotions well? A lot of people are like that so they try to avoid the situation.

Me personally, I know not having my father there is going to be hard enough. I have no intention of having a dance with my brother because I know I will not be able to handle it. My brother will have to understand that. I don't want to be a mess that night.

How did you leave off with them when you said you were hurt?


I hung up on him. He kept saying it wasn't a big deal and I tried to explain to him it was to me but he didn't get it.
Gigi08 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You


How did you leave off with them when you said you were hurt?


I hung up on him. He kept saying it wasn't a big deal and I tried to explain to him it was to me but he didn't get it.


Aww, I understand you're hurt and this means a lot to you. Maybe it's harder for them then you realize? Maybe they'll come around. Try to cool off and take a little more time to think it over. You don't want to have bad feelings. If they don't give in, they will be walking you down the ailse and having a special dance with you...that will be really special. Maybe there is something else you can do in your father's memory that they would be more agreeable to? If not, if you don't push them on it, maybe they'll surprise you.
kimNanthony Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

Posted by Gigi08


How did you leave off with them when you said you were hurt?


I hung up on him. He kept saying it wasn't a big deal and I tried to explain to him it was to me but he didn't get it.


Aww, I understand you're hurt and this means a lot to you. Maybe it's harder for them then you realize? Maybe they'll come around. Try to cool off and take a little more time to think it over. You don't want to have bad feelings. If they don't give in, they will be walking you down the ailse and having a special dance with you...that will be really special. Maybe there is something else you can do in your father's memory that they would be more agreeable to? If not, if you don't push them on it, maybe they'll surprise you.


Thank you so much you are so sweet
GinaBambina08 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

I would be disappointed but not upset....I understand where they're coming from, they already seem to be highly involved in your wedding and they both have very time-consuming professions and probably have a high aversion to giving speeches, so i'd try my luck to see if they'd do it, but if not i would try not to be upset...

agraydc Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You

maybe they think it will be too emotional for them to give a speech...you have every right to feel hurt, but maybe give them a chance to come around or talk to them about your feelings, dont pressure them but explain and see what happens.....
speech or no speech, it sounds like they love you very much and that will show as you dance together and thats what is really important
Gigi08 Posted:

Re: Would This Bother You


Thank you so much you are so sweet


Aw, thank you. Don't mention it. Like another girl said, it sounds like they love you very much. And the fact that your FH is as close with them is very nice. You don't find that often...treasure that, because you will have that after your wedding is over.

Reply to this topic

Log in to reply or quote a post.