My friend is getting married a month before me and I'm so happy about. Since we get to do all the planning together. FH was a little upset by it. Would you be upset too?
I did talk to him and he's happy with everything too.
MaggieLuvsJoe
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Re: Would you be upset?
One of my friends almost did this until she realized how expensive weddings are and that she needs more time to save.
It's kind of annoying of her but you really can't be upset, it is a month before so it's not that bad. You will still shine on your wedding day
flairforfashion
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I'd be a little pissed but unfortunately, pepople tend to compete. I don't get it.
9-21-07
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Re: Would you be upset?
My very good friend from high school got engaged over 6 months before i did but she planned a very long engagement. One of the original dates I was looking at would have been 8 days after hers. I decided it was way too close and unfair to her so we pushed it back to august which is about 2 months after her wedding. You can't really control when other people plan their wedding for. It's a whole month before your date so you will still have all the glory and attention on your wedding. I wouldn't be too upset. Just be careful about what details you share with her. Since you said she has similar taste you don't want to give her any of your good ideas because you want your day to be special and unique to you and your groom.
bluegreen08
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Re: Would you be upset?
I would be disappointed at first but I'd get over it quickly.
We have good friends getting married 2 weeks before us. We were engaged first (by a month or so) and set our date immediately. The girl is a teacher and they really wanted a summer wedding because she'd be off. They originally wanted June/July but their church was booked until Aug 2nd. We told them as long as it leaves them enough time to get back from their honeymoon and make it to ours (the guy is a groomsmen in our wedding, and FH is one in theirs) that was fine. It helps that it's not in NY and we dont have a large guest list overlap (but we dont have to travel, the wedding is where the currently live). They werent doing it for spite, and it's fun to have a friend planning on the same timeline. It will also be fun to go to a wedding shortly before ours -- we are the first of our friends to be getting married and we've never been to a friend's wedding.
Yeah it's a little weird with the whole 'we got engaged first, we should get married first' (we started dating 3 months before them, got engaged 1 month before, and they are beating us to the alter by 2 weeks) but in the end that does not matter at all
Hugs
You can't really call dibs on a particular time -- we couldnt tell our friends to wait another year or that they couldnt have summer 08 --- and I would have been pissed if they told US we couldn't get married when WE wanted to (had the tables been turned)
Christine N Ralph
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Re: Would you be upset?
I would be annoyed...but thats just me...I have a feeling that this is going to happen to me at some point because all of my friends are at that age now...and that point in their relationship!!!
PP424
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Re: Would you be upset?
FH is concerned cause she's already stolen my spotlight when took my girls for their BM dresses. After we picked out the BM dresses, I tried my gown on for everyone. And then she asked if she could try hers on (it's somewhat similar) and so she did in front of my whole bridal party. When I told FH, he couldn't believe she did that. And he's getting concerned for me, since I'm not one to voice my opinion about things like that. It's a hard situation since you don't want to sound like a bridezilla. He thinks I should tell her I do mind (she called last night if I would mind), but how can tell my best friend that I mind her getting married so close to mine. It doesn't bother me that it's before me at all, it just bothers me that it's so close and our weddings are going to be very similar. Should I talk to her, or just let it go?
FutureMrsLehmann
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Re: Would you be upset?
a little upset, but think of it like this... you 2 are not going to have the exact same guest list, in fact at least half the guests (prob more) that attend your wedding will not be at her wedding, so no one will know that there was a similar wedding a month before yours.
panjay
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It would bother me, but I don't think you can say anything. I agree with someone else who said not to share too many of your ideas with her.
flairforfashion
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Re: Would you be upset?
Posted by Jamey09
FH is concerned cause she's already stolen my spotlight when took my girls for their BM dresses. After we picked out the BM dresses, I tried my gown on for everyone. And then she asked if she could try hers on (it's somewhat similar) and so she did in front of my whole bridal party. When I told FH, he couldn't believe she did that. And he's getting concerned for me, since I'm not one to voice my opinion about things like that. It's a hard situation since you don't want to sound like a bridezilla. He thinks I should tell her I do mind (she called last night if I would mind), but how can tell my best friend that I mind her getting married so close to mine. It doesn't bother me that it's before me at all, it just bothers me that it's so close and our weddings are going to be very similar. Should I talk to her, or just let it go?
I think that is wrong. It is YOUR time to shine and that should have been your time to show everyone your dress. Not hers. I would see how things go because this isn't something so bad to even bring up. If she pulls some nasty sh*t in the future, then I'd bring it up. She may not intentially do these things. It happens to a lot of people that are getting married.
kabo0831
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ill be upset too they are stealing your thunder
PP424
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Posted by panjay
It would bother me, but I don't think you can say anything. I agree with someone else who said not to share too many of your ideas with her.
Yes, I agree too. It was funny she came with me to almost every dress place I went and saw all the dresses I liked (all lace and sheath, and mermaids), so when she tried hers on,it was a lace sheath. I don't mind because she looks amazing, it was meant for her, but I just don't want the rest of our weddings so be the same. And we have been sharing a lot of our ideas with them and I feel bad to stop, but I have to.
AugustBridein09
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Re: Would you be upset?
i would just tell her.
PP424
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Re: Would you be upset?
I just talked to her and I can't be upset at her, she just seems so happy and I'm happy for her. I guess I'll just watch not to tell her too much and just enjoy sharing the planning together. Just hopefully FH doesn't stay mad at her too long.
Thank you everyone. You girls are the best
mf2009
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Re: Would you be upset?
Posted by Jamey09
Posted by panjay
It would bother me, but I don't think you can say anything. I agree with someone else who said not to share too many of your ideas with her.
Yes, I agree too. It was funny she came with me to almost every dress place I went and saw all the dresses I liked (all lace and sheath, and mermaids), so when she tried hers on,it was a lace sheath. I don't mind because she looks amazing, it was meant for her, but I just don't want the rest of our weddings so be the same. And we have been sharing a lot of our ideas with them and I feel bad to stop, but I have to.
You can't control when a person gets married but you can limit how much they know about it. Just to play it safe. Try not to talk about what you are doing for your wedding especially if you two have the same taste.
Cacarina
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Re: Would you be upset?
I think I would be a little upset, but nothing you can do about it. You don't own the year 2009. Your friend has to do what is best for her, and she can't really plan her wedding around yours...no offense. But I totally see where you are coming from being upset. I would be too, I just wouldn't say anything and I'd give my friend my blessing.
stephlovesseyi
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It doesn't matter. I wouldn't be upset by this. As long as it wasn't the same day as me, I'd be fine with it.
Future Mulligan
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Re: Would you be upset?
dont let it get to you - if there are special touches you want for your wedding than keep those ideas to yourself - but it really doesnt matter since your guest list will be totally different except for any mutual friends that you might have....i dont think you should be upset by it - you cant control things like that.....FH and i chose to have a 17 month engagement and his cousin got engaged last month and is getting married in June - i dont mind at all - just because we are engaged and set a date doesnt mean that everyone else should have to wait....at this point dont stress it - if it were me i might keep some things to myself about my wedding just so that i couldnt get annoyed if my friend copied me
ItalianMcBride09
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Re: Would you be upset?
Not at all , its so silly to get upset whats important is the comitment to your FH and what the two of you have, there are only so many days in a year, now if it was a sibling or cousin that the same guest list and everything like that was the same, Id be upset but still be happy that I was getting married to the man of my dream and I wouldnt sweat the small stuff....there are worse things in life then such silly details......HTH and dont take the the wrong way JMO
PP424
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Re: Would you be upset? ....UPDATED
I'm so happy I talk to my friend (MOH), I feel so much better and I do feel in the end everything will work out perfect and it'll be so nice to share this together. Too bad we can't go on our honeymoons together - now that might be pushing it -or would it!!!
