If your MOH let you down pretty bad and upset you... would you consider it?
Add this on: if your MOH let you down AND there was someone else in your BP that REALLY REALLY came through for you, more than you EVER expected and was there for you when you needed someone and your MOH was not. You felt so thankful for this person stepping up that you wanted to give her the title instead. Would you 'dethrone' the dissappointing MOH and 'promote' the friend that has been there for you more?
FLaCaTaCa
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
I have thought about it over and over again. I don't think I will unless something big happens...for now it is little tiffs.
suven
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
I would not demote someone. but, I would promote someone else...
CubanBride
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
Yes, I would, without a second thought.
Donna
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
Posted by suven
I would not demote someone. but, I would promote someone else...
I agree. And maybe the original MOH may step down on her own since she has to share the position.
mushsgrl
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
My MOH is my younger sister. i thought about this before, all of my bridesmaids and my sister went to an expo she was so not into it. She hates wearing dressess, she doesnt care. She said shes not gonna smile for pictures.i told her i will ring her neck if she doesnt smile, we are paying a lot of money for the pictures.. My dad told me I can demote her, it was his idea. i just cant bring myself to do it. i know deep down she wants the 'job' she just doesnt know what to do. it is a tough decision.
JacnRob729
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
instead of demoting her, why dont you just have 2 moh/
TP&SH82506
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
I would first confront her, and then if things dont change then i dont know what i would do, because if shes that bad, it would probable be better to take her out of wedding party then to demote, it seems a bit imbarrasing to demote. but your taking a risk either way with your relationship.
Ang&Rich
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
I said yes - but let me explain...I agree that you should approach her and try to work this out. Based on the outcome of that conversation I would then proceed to either keep her or cut her. Honestly that's how I feel - why tolerate that? If you're not happy don't settle! JMO!!!!!
JimmysBride
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
Posted by JacnRob729
instead of demoting her, why dont you just have 2 moh/
I didn't say I was demoting anyone... it's a hypothetical, let's keep it that way so it stays civil.
I already have 2 MOHs
jonspenguin11552
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
What about having 2 MOH's - I have 2.. My little sister and my best friend. My little sister is doing JACK, but my best friend - is amazing!
Marisa&Brian
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
No - You don't demote your friends/family ! Your wedding is not a business relationship ! These are people you've known your whole life !! - How would you feel if you were 'demoted' ??? You'll be ruining a relationship
kbeana24
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
Posted by mushsgrl
My MOH is my younger sister. i thought about this before, all of my bridesmaids and my sister went to an expo she was so not into it. She hates wearing dressess, she doesnt care. She said shes not gonna smile for pictures.i told her i will ring her neck if she doesnt smile, we are paying a lot of money for the pictures.. My dad told me I can demote her, it was his idea. i just cant bring myself to do it. i know deep down she wants the 'job' she just doesnt know what to do. it is a tough decision.
Do we have the same sister??? My sis is my MOH and she could care less. She was the first to tell me she was busy on the day I wanted to get BM dresses. She didnt come with me to get MY dress, I feel like SHE DOESNT CARE. Another one of my BM has been SO there for me throughout EVERYTHING. I am seriously considering switching them. I dont know what my sister would say to that, and I dont want to hurt her, but if she doesnt want to do this, then I dont want her to do this either
Charly
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
Posted by JimmysBride
If your MOH let you down pretty bad and upset you... would you consider it?
Add this on: if your MOH let you down AND there was someone else in your BP that REALLY REALLY came through for you, more than you EVER expected and was there for you when you needed someone and your MOH was not. You felt so thankful for this person stepping up that you wanted to give her the title instead. Would you 'dethrone' the dissappointing MOH and 'promote' the friend that has been there for you more?
I'm in the SAME situation - and I've thought really hard about it, but I could never actually do it.
Believe me our relationship will never be the same after how badly she let me down, but the wedding isn't the time to do it. You don't want unnecessary drama. I'm getting the other bridesmaid a special gift and I will give it to her in confidence.
Nora101004
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I don't think I'd demote her but maybe promote the other one and have 2 MOH's.
RedHead
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
I thought about this (and my MOH is my sister!) But being sooo close to your wedding i would not bother...OR like someone else said..promote the special person!
Pookiesangel
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
Posted by Ang&Rich
I said yes - but let me explain...I agree that you should approach her and try to work this out. Based on the outcome of that conversation I would then proceed to either keep her or cut her. Honestly that's how I feel - why tolerate that? If you're not happy don't settle! JMO!!!!!
Ditto!
Bunnymonkey
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
There is no need to demote or promote anyone as long as there are people who are supporting you and doing what you need them to do - Regardless of their 'title.'
My MOH is my sister who is a DR. and very busy and getting married herself, and sort of selfish and unsupportive and blah blah blah....
My little sister is my strength through this, and is basically my everything.
Everyone keeps telling me to 'demote' the older sis, and 'promote' the younger one, but I think this whole 'title' thing is ridiculous and taken way too seriously. As long as little sis is there for me, I am okay.
If the person who is stepping up is doing so out of the goodness of her heart and because she loves you, she won't 'need' to be promoted to MOH. She deserves a nice gift for the wedding and a very heartfelt thank you. She sounds like a true friend.
Demoting and promoting becomes a control thing, and it may make the bridal party feel like they are under your supreme reign. It will only cause problems, hurt friendships, and make you look like total bridezilla (even if you are doing it for good reasons.)
Just my two cents-it's something I have thought about alot.
good luck with your dilemma.
dita531
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
If it ever got to the point to 'demote' someone why not just kick them out all together?
LuvMyMichael
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Re: Would you 'demote' your MOH?
I personally would never demote my MOH only because she is my one & only sister and sibling. I know I would live to regret not having her as my MOH.
