WWYD?

If you have the option of spending *a lot* of money on the RH of your dreams... (without going into debt)

...or settling for something else that is nice enough but HALF price ( not exactly what you would have wanted had money not been an issue .. but you can live with it)

What would you do?

How important is it really?...
Is you wedding day just so exciting that it doesn't matter where you have it in the long run? Or do you think that you will regret it and feel as if you should have just splurged on the place of your dreams?

I'd save it.

While the wedding is (obviously) important to FH and I, so is our future - and on a much larger level than the wedding.

I approach the wedding like I'm just planning a large-scale party: because that's what I'm doing. It's not going to be the be-all, end-all of weddings - that much I know. I just want the food to be good and plentiful and the music to be great, and for our guests to have an awesome time.

I would rather have a BEAUTIFUL home and have had a nice wedding with SOME WOW factor.

Thanks girls! I have my mother telling me to spend more (very unusual for her) and my future MIL saying the opposite. FH doesn't care either way. So I am left to my own devices... and I go back and forth all the time.

The reality is that my wedding will not break the bank. My max price is $15,000 (including engagement ring!) This is really nothing in comparison to most brides and will not make or break us really. It will not interfere with us buying a house or putting our kids through college or anything. It is just a matter of principle for us.. how important is all this really? For a few hours?

I am having a small 45-50 person wedding.

These are my options:

1. I can rent the grounds of a B&B in upstate NY (2.5 hours from home). The grounds are beautiful with 6 acres of gardens. We will have the entire place to ourselves and they have a beautiful ballroom with cathedral ceilings for the reception.

We can have our wedding on a Saturday evening at no additional cost. Our guests can rent out a room (or go home if they'd like). The only thing is that ALL the food must be brought in from an outside caterer. This means fees for waitstaff and all rentals on top of food and brings the price to about $200 per person for everything. The food is good, but not as extensive as what is offered at a typical wedding with massive stations and what not.

We also like the fact that since most of my family members are from out of state--we can kind of extend our wedding over the weekend. We can all have breakfast the next morning in the B&B and then spend the following afternoon going to the wineries, etc. It is more of a destinaiton wedding.. and I have considered that for more money, I am also stretching out my wedding for more than 5 hours!

This will also bring costs upwards to the top of our budget at $13,000 for the entire affair.


or...


2. We can settle for something more typical. Smithtown Landing CC is $76 a head including taxes and fees! Our entire wedding can be below $10,000! I think this place is nice enough.. but we won't get the private facility (they are one wedding at a time, but do have other parties going on), we won't be able to do a Saturday night because it's not available and we won't have the nice garden for ceremony and pics. I do like the greenery there.. and it is a nice, but VERY traditional catering hall on a golf course. We didn't like traditional..but can deal with it.


So with that said (obviously you can see what I prefer).. what would you think is the better option? I am naturally a cheap, frugal person who has a great deal of difficulty spending any kind of money (I told FH to not spend more than $1K on an engagement ring!) And $200 a head blows my mind. But then I also don't want to regret my decision for years and always wonder why I didn't just spend the money.

Sorry for the LONG post. I do appreciate your input!!!! I just don't want to have regrets either way.

---

Posted by cherryblossom

Thanks girls! I have my mother telling me to spend more (very unusual for her) and my future MIL saying the opposite. FH doesn't care either way. So I am left to my own devices... and I go back and forth all the time.

The reality is that my wedding will not break the bank. My max price is $15,000 (including engagement ring!) This is really nothing in comparison to most brides and will not make or break us really. It will not interfere with us buying a house or putting our kids through college or anything. It is just a matter of principle for us.. how important is all this really? For a few hours?

I am having a small 45-50 person wedding.

These are my options:

1. I can rent the grounds of a B&B in upstate NY (2.5 hours from home). The grounds are beautiful with 6 acres of gardens. We will have the entire place to ourselves and they have a beautiful ballroom with cathedral ceilings for the reception.

We can have our wedding on a Saturday evening at no additional cost. Our guests can rent out a room (or go home if they'd like). The only thing is that ALL the food must be brought in from an outside caterer. This means fees for waitstaff and all rentals on top of food and brings the price to about $200 per person for everything. The food is good, but not as extensive as what is offered at a typical wedding with massive stations and what not.

We also like the fact that since most of my family members are from out of state--we can kind of extend our wedding over the weekend. We can all have breakfast the next morning in the B&B and then spend the following afternoon going to the wineries, etc. It is more of a destinaiton wedding.. and I have considered that for more money, I am also stretching out my wedding for more than 5 hours!

This will also bring costs upwards to the top of our budget at $13,000 for the entire affair.


or...


2. We can settle for something more typical. Smithtown Landing CC is $76 a head including taxes and fees! Our entire wedding can be below $10,000! I think this place is nice enough.. but we won't get the private facility (they are one wedding at a time, but do have other parties going on), we won't be able to do a Saturday night because it's not available and we won't have the nice garden for ceremony and pics. I do like the greenery there.. and it is a nice, but VERY traditional catering hall on a golf course. We didn't like traditional..but can deal with it.


So with that said (obviously you can see what I prefer).. what would you think is the better option? I am naturally a cheap, frugal person who has a great deal of difficulty spending any kind of money (I told FH to not spend more than $1K on an engagement ring!) And $200 a head blows my mind. But then I also don't want to regret my decision for years and always wonder why I didn't just spend the money.

Sorry for the LONG post. I do appreciate your input!!!! I just don't want to have regrets either way.

---

My honest opinion is do what you prefer. You don't want to regret not doing exactly what you wanted and having the pictures you wanted from your wedding day. I say go for it!! We did!!

IMO I would save the money. After having a wedding that was in no means over the top (and I paid cash for everything) but I could have saved at least 10K or more by just being a bit more frugal I would have done it looking back.

I could have used that money for the house we are now buying and it would have not changed my day in the least.

You have to look and decide what is important for you. Is it the B&B wedding or would you rather have that money for something else.

FH and I had the same choice to make and we went with the cheaper option. We'd rather save the money for a house. But seeing your two options, it doesn't seem like that much of a difference in price. So if you really love option 1, maybe you should go with it.