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XOXO
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Re: Vent- SWD- Very long
Ugh, sounds so vile. No, I don't think your overreacting..it's just disgusting. They probably think you don't know anything, just like their wives don't know anything. I don't think it's that they're not scared of you, just that they think you're oblivious.
I wouldn't even report it though. I'd be afraid of retribution to you AND FH. They could always turn around and say FH was a willing participant and he could get in trouble to.
As much as I hate to say it, just let it go.
I wouldn't even report it though. I'd be afraid of retribution to you AND FH. They could always turn around and say FH was a willing participant and he could get in trouble to.
As much as I hate to say it, just let it go.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Honestly I think you are. FIrst it was after work hours so IMO what is done outside the office should stay there. For you to go to work and report it would put a lot of people in very bad situations.
and I am sure the stripper did not need any egging on for her to put the banana up there......they do that sort of stuff all the time......did she bring the banana? Not sure most bars have bananas laying around....lemons and limes yes, bananas no.
You DH acted fine and what other peoples DH do I think is none of anyone's business but theirs.
and I am sure the stripper did not need any egging on for her to put the banana up there......they do that sort of stuff all the time......did she bring the banana? Not sure most bars have bananas laying around....lemons and limes yes, bananas no.
You DH acted fine and what other peoples DH do I think is none of anyone's business but theirs.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Honestly? Let it go. It's a one-time thing, it won't happen again, because well FH is only marrying you once, lol.
If it's something they do for all of the guys at work, I don't see why it's any different for your FH. And their age is irrelevant. Boys will be boys forever. They will always be into women doing nasty sh!t........what is the saying? They want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed? Yea, their age isn't going to change that. Why would it be ok if it were his friends, but it's not ok for his co-workers? It's not like they think any less of you because they threw this party for FH. It actually was not about you - it was about FH.
And ALL offices frown upon stuff like that, but that doesn't mean that people don't do it. My old office had an 'unofficial happy hour' every week, but it was still 'officially' frowned upon. It's what they HAVE to say.
If it's something they do for all of the guys at work, I don't see why it's any different for your FH. And their age is irrelevant. Boys will be boys forever. They will always be into women doing nasty sh!t........what is the saying? They want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed? Yea, their age isn't going to change that. Why would it be ok if it were his friends, but it's not ok for his co-workers? It's not like they think any less of you because they threw this party for FH. It actually was not about you - it was about FH.
And ALL offices frown upon stuff like that, but that doesn't mean that people don't do it. My old office had an 'unofficial happy hour' every week, but it was still 'officially' frowned upon. It's what they HAVE to say.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Ewwww!! A banana up your vag??? W T F! First of all that's so freaking dirty and ouch! I'd be annoyed because I feel like if a guy doesn't want a stripper the others just get it because they're the ones who need it. Ugh!!! What douche bags!
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Posted by Marianne13
OH I just want to clarify that I have NOOOO desire to report this. It bothers me that they have no fear that I will.
And second, even though it was after work, believe it or not the ethics office says that anything that happens after work is an extension of the work place. For instance, if I'm in a bar at happy hour and make a comment about sex, you as my coworker can get offended and report it. It's silly but it is the rule.
And no, I don't think the work guys provided the banana..lol
youre right... if work people are together after work hours it is considered an extension of work... weird but its true...
but the banana thing... is ridiculous...
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
a banana?? seriously? am i the only one who never realized they actually did that???/
ewwww
ewwww
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
I think you're right to be grossed out by the banana thing...because...ewww. ![]()
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But...yeah. Don't let this get to you, just let it go. There's nothing you can do about it and its over and done with...it was just guys being guys. No harm came of it and while it was probably a boneheaded thing to do...oh well, like I said, its over.
Ugh though...on the banana...Uggggggggggggh.
But...yeah. Don't let this get to you, just let it go. There's nothing you can do about it and its over and done with...it was just guys being guys. No harm came of it and while it was probably a boneheaded thing to do...oh well, like I said, its over.
Ugh though...on the banana...Uggggggggggggh.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
I can totally understand your disgust bc I'd def feel the same way. Strippers with bananas? GROSS! But IMO I dont see the difference between his 'work friends' and his 'real life friends' taking him out...And these coworkers are celebrating the same way they would celebrate any of the guys bach parties...whether or not the bride works with them makes no difference to them. They are not specifically going out with the intentions of disrespecting you... This is just how men act at bach parties. I'm not condoning it at all, but what makes you think they should treat this bach party any different just bc you work with them?
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Sounds like not a big deal so long as no one took pictures!
I don't know why guys like strip clubs/strippers but they do. IMO its perv and gross but that's just me.
I think they like it cause it's different that what's going on at home.![]()
I don't know why guys like strip clubs/strippers but they do. IMO its perv and gross but that's just me.
I think they like it cause it's different that what's going on at home.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Posted by Marianne13
OH I just want to clarify that I have NOOOO desire to report this. It bothers me that they have no fear that I will.
And second, even though it was after work, believe it or not the ethics office says that anything that happens after work is an extension of the work place. For instance, if I'm in a bar at happy hour and make a comment about sex, you as my coworker can get offended and report it. It's silly but it is the rule.
And no, I don't think the work guys provided the banana..lol
This is true, that things outside of work can be considered an extension of the workplace. I've worked in HR for almost 9 years so I know very well that it can be taken that way.
That's not to say that when I'm outside of the workplace with a few people who I trust and am very friendly with who also happen to be coworkers, we don't act like a bunch of fools and say inappropriate things. (Hell, half the time crazy stuff is said AT work but it's a more lenient environment so things tend to not get escalated.)
I'm sure that the guys involved are people who consider themselves to be in a tight-knit, core group of work buddies and just wanted to have a good time. Let it go.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
Sorry..but I would be pissed off too. Did FH know there were going to be stippers there, but just didn't tell you? Also, these men whom you know, should have respected his and yours wishes with the no stripper request. Shoving a bannana up your vagina, come on now? I personlly don't get the point of these parties, but hey.
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Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
am i the only one who is shocked by the fact that a bar is allowed to let you have strippers in it??
i can't figure out what you think you're overreacting about... so no, i don't think you're overreacting!
i can't figure out what you think you're overreacting about... so no, i don't think you're overreacting!
Member since
Re: Vent- SWR- Very long
I'd be a little annoyed and more than a little disgusted, but I think you are handling it well. You're not mad at FH and you're not reporting it, you just wanted to vent! That's what we're here for! Just don't let it interfere with your work with those guys.
