Adjusting to married life...

Not sure if anyone has posted about this (if so, please bump, or reply with link), but it's been funny adjusting to this new life.

A little background:
*DH & I both lived @ home until we married.
*DH & I started EVERYTHING from scratch - new apt, new furniture, new appliances, etc, etc.
*Apt not complete: still need dinner table/chair set, coffee/end tables, his dresser, and home accents (ie, living & bedroom curtains, picture frames, bookshelves, etc).

I guess what's weird to me is that, after a month, I still don't feel like our place is home. We don't have the apt complete, and we still haven't gotten used to our sleeping routine (he turns in at least an hour before I do).

I love him to death, and I know that everything will eventually even out, but any words of advice for us newlyweds to ease the process?

Re: Adjusting to married life...

Patience, Compromise and Communication is the key.....

DH and I both lived together for 2yrs before the wedding and we lived on our own before moving in together. Although our experience is a little different, but I would just say be patient with each other. We used too spend the night when we had our own apt, but 24/7 is a different beast.

For people who have never lived together, this is your time to learn about each other. We've been together 5 yrs and I'm still learning. Somethings won't bother you but others will make you want to scream at the top of your lungs. If something bothers you don't just blurt it out, make your case calmly and give him a chance to respond.

Re: Adjusting to married life...

This might be easier said than done, but...

Don't rush it. Moving in together and settling into your first home should be an incredibly positive bonding experience. Try not to let it get you stressed out, because it's the only time in your life when you will go through this.

Think about all the fun you'll have shopping for new furniture and stuff - and even if stops being fun after a while (which it will!), you can laugh about it later, like 'do you remember when it took us 8 months to find a kitchen table and we ate every meal in the living room on bath towels?!'

Re: Adjusting to married life...

My husband and I were the same way. 23 and he got orders to move to Florida after the wedding. We packed up all our gifts,bought furniture that we could afford, found a small apartment and we didn't have nice things (correction we did we had a ton of Tiffany and Waterford) but no place or use for them yet.

And I lived at home during college and he went to military college so we didn't even have college stuff we had nothing.

But looking back we have since moved 2x's since that apartment and recently purchased a brand new construction house and are slowly turning our new house into a home but when we think back our fondest memories was when we were newlyweds and in our little crappy apartment that was filled with things from Walmart.

It will get better and it will get easier but enjoy the newness of everything because it really is a special time when you look back.

Re: Adjusting to married life...

Don't worry, it will all work out over time, it is still very soon after the wedding. You have to handle one thing at a time by priority and I think that getting your living space organized and comfortable is key. Then when you both are home you can actually start to enjoy the space and enjoy daily routines without feeling displaced due to boxes, finding stuff, put everything in place and that is the start. Then you can enjoy watching movies together and doing stuff like that.

Re: Adjusting to married life...

Our first apartment felt like a cold hotel. White and bare. It comes together

Re: Adjusting to married life...

I truely can relate my dh and i live together before marriage 6 months to be exact. It was a experience we had been dating for 10 years and never live together. It was hard at first because we have a studio , we had to share everything like tv and computer. I was not used to that. I was use to having my own room and my tv. But I am glad that we decide live together before marriage. I got chance to know my dh. So relax you will be alright.

Re: Adjusting to married life...

I know that everything will be just fine. Don't mind my venting... I just feel so unorganized, and uncomfortable still with the apt. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely am loving the experience, because DH & I are finally husband & wife... not to mention, my best friend is my roommate. I'm loving it. Just feeling 'off kilt' because everything is not completely under control yet. But I know that with time, it will be.

Thanks girls for listening/writing.

Re: Adjusting to married life...

My DH and i moved into our condo over two years ago. And it was an adjustment. You learn sooo much about each other. But it was difficult at times. Most issues were silly; who cleaned what, what we wanted for dinner, and yes his moving around at night. But i agree with the above..patience, compromise and communication..they are the KEY!
It does work itself out and i am sooo loving it now!

Be happy you have an uncomplete apt...more fun things to buy!!!!! I love decorating

Re: Adjusting to married life...

don't worry, it tkes some time, we had the same experience, never lived together and started from scratch!
I've been married for 6 months, and still missing some stuff in my apartment, I need a dinner table and a computer desk, but everything starts coming together. At the beginning, I use to come to an empty apartment because we bought stuff little by little.
I'm also still getting use to sleeping habits, DH wakes up earlier, so like to go to bed early and he does not like to sleep with the tv on, so I compromise, I go to bed with him, and if i want to stay up, I watch a little bit more tv in the living room, no big deal.
This is your new husband, your new apartment and you new everything, you will get use to it! we are still newlyweds

Re: Adjusting to married life...

didianita... are you us!? You should JUST LIKE I DO! From starting from scratch, to our sleeping habits (he wakes up earlier, too). The only difference is that I'm a lil selfish, and still turn on the tv after he's been asleep for about an hour...

Re: Adjusting to married life...

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Posted by chichila15

didianita... are you us!? You should JUST LIKE I DO! From starting from scratch, to our sleeping habits (he wakes up earlier, too). The only difference is that I'm a lil selfish, and still turn on the tv after he's been asleep for about an hour...

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I do it once in a while too! because it's not fair, he acts like an old man! and he sleeps like a baby anyway, all you hear is him snoring!!!