Babies having babies...just a vent *EDITED*

I just have to get this off my chest. 3 young girls that I use to work with at a Vets office (approx 4yrs ago) they are 18, 19, and 19yrs old....ALL PREGNANT or BEEN PREGNANT! Not all at the same time but pretty close. They have not graduated school, not married but with loser guys who smoke weed and dont work! GRRRR...what is with with young girls getting pregnant...is it a freaking game!!???!! If you could only see their profiles...all 'Im so happy' blah blah blah and pics of themselves pregnant..well, do they think about whats goingto happen after those babies are born? I can guarentee the dads wont be in the picutre for much longer... I guess i m upset because i am ready for a baby just not finacially yet..but you have all these teenager girls getting pregnant like its going out of buisness..

Vent over..

I have to add...yes, some girls get pregnant because they feel they will be happy ok. I am from The Bronx...tho not an excuse...and I am not saying ALL girls from the Bronx are like this. But ur typical teenager (who wasnt raised right) meets a guy..who doesnt work, doesnt go to school..smokes weed and drinks all day..and BAM shes pregnant!!! THIS IS WHY IM MAD! I am not mad at teenagers who accidently become pregnant or get pregnant and make the best of it. Im talking about teenagers who dont even care!

I know its so disturbing...they are acting like its a new trend or something they have no clue on whats waiting for them...Did you see 'Kimbalinas' post the other day its a site that has pics of preggo teens and them having babies...here is the link if you missed it...


http://whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com/

yeah, when you're young it can almost seem so 'cool' to be pregnant. Makes you feel adult and all of that I remember when I was around 14 I thought how wonderful it must feel to be pregnant and I just could not wait to grow up, get married, and start a family (I LOVED kids, was always babysitting and such). But I wasn't STUPID!! I understood the responsibilities that it's not just like playing house. I don't get why these girls are such idiots and don't understand that When I started college, I remember kind of feeling like I wanted to 'mother' something - so i got a PUPPY!! lol. And he was enough work as it is. That's what these kids need - pets, not babies

Edited ** I dont want to start drama ***

Lets just say I agree w. the original post.

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Posted by RockysGirl

yeah, when you're young it can almost seem so 'cool' to be pregnant. Makes you feel adult and all of that I remember when I was around 14 I thought how wonderful it must feel to be pregnant and I just could not wait to grow up, get married, and start a family (I LOVED kids, was always babysitting and such). But I wasn't STUPID!! I understood the responsibilities that it's not just like playing house. I don't get why these girls are such idiots and don't understand that When I started college, I remember kind of feeling like I wanted to 'mother' something - so i got a PUPPY!! lol. And he was enough work as it is. That's what these kids need - pets, not babies

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EXACTLY! I also remember being 14 and couldnt wait to get married and having a family...but I understood the responsibilites that came along with that. But for some reason young girls now a days arent seeing this. Could it be bad parenting? I dunno...but something is terrible wrong....I to wanted a baby even badly as I grew up...so yes, I got a dog...in fact I got 2 dogs! lol..and they are def. a hand full

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Posted by bettybcafe82

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Posted by RockysGirl

yeah, when you're young it can almost seem so 'cool' to be pregnant. Makes you feel adult and all of that I remember when I was around 14 I thought how wonderful it must feel to be pregnant and I just could not wait to grow up, get married, and start a family (I LOVED kids, was always babysitting and such). But I wasn't STUPID!! I understood the responsibilities that it's not just like playing house. I don't get why these girls are such idiots and don't understand that When I started college, I remember kind of feeling like I wanted to 'mother' something - so i got a PUPPY!! lol. And he was enough work as it is. That's what these kids need - pets, not babies

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EXACTLY! I also remember being 14 and couldnt wait to get married and having a family...but I understood the responsibilites that came along with that. But for some reason young girls now a days arent seeing this. Could it be bad parenting? I dunno...but something is terrible wrong....I to wanted a baby even badly as I grew up...so yes, I got a dog...in fact I got 2 dogs! lol..and they are def. a hand full

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yeah, I don't think we're alone in this. I feel like MOST teen girls do love babies and even think about what it would be like to have one of their own. And that's why we BABYSIT as practice for your future. And most young teenagers are smart enough to realize that THAT'S when you're supposed to have babies - in the FUTURE. Although I guess there are a bunch who are NOT so smart. I agree with you - I think it probably does have a lot to do with the way they're raised.

A lot of teenage girls that get pregnant are seeking to fill a void in themselves. Many were abused or grew up in homes with no fathers, and/or little attention from the parent that was around. Often these kids are raised by grandparents, or mother that had them when they were teens etc....

As a Guidance Counselor I work with girls in this situation, it is a hard path that they choose, but they are looking for uncontindional love that they never had. I am not trying to preach I just see things differently working with girls who are going through it.

My cousin just had a baby at age 21 (granted, not a teenager) and at her baby shower... I would say about 75% of her friends either already had a baby or were pregnant. I was shocked!! Listening to these young girls talk about bottles and breast feeding was just sooo surreal. None of them went to college, none of them have solid relationships, none of them have 'career' jobs... and my cousin's fiance has been unemployed since before the baby was born (5 months ago). Meanwhile, one of my best friends and her DH (age 30, married, have a house, both have careers) have been trying to have a baby for months now and having no luck. Funny how things work.

i agree with you to a certain extent, if these girls aren't ready then they should have waited.. but I'm also a little offended by some things said here.. I'm 22, I just turned 21 when I got pregnant ( 3 months after we got married), we own a home, and I'm a sahm, while DH works. We are both still in school, i graduate in may with a BA and DH will graduate with his masters in August.

I dont think its right to bash EVERYONE that is young.. maybe the people you guys have dealt with are idiots, but I know quite a few of my friends, who are my age, have families.

before judging people, saying there not happy with there situation, maybe they are trying to make the best out of the situation, or maybe they are truly happy, i know i am.

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before judging people, saying there not happy with there situation, maybe they are trying to make the best out of the situation, or maybe they are truly happy, i know i am.

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I agree. In general this thread bothers me. It is in bad taste to judge others. I sure would not like others to judge me, my life, my decisions. It really is no one's business when or why people decide to have children. I am not trying to cause drama but it irks me that people feel they can just paint all teen mothers with this negative brush.

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Posted by lizzie217

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before judging people, saying there not happy with there situation, maybe they are trying to make the best out of the situation, or maybe they are truly happy, i know i am.

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I agree. In general this thread bothers me. It is in bad taste to judge others. I sure would not like others to judge me, my life, my decisions. It really is no one's business when or why people decide to have children. I am not trying to cause drama but it irks me that people feel they can just paint all teen mothers with this negative brush.

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No, no...I am not judging ALL teenager young mothers. There are obviously diff. situations to each person, I understand that. But from what Ive seen its just been stupidity...for example..the father of one of these children has a myspace profile and each pic is of him smoking and drinking...(hes 19) and the subtitles all contain curse words (even about his newborn) I am not saying that all young people are like this...just the MANY that I know are..and it upsets me that they do not think about what they are doing.

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Posted by bettybcafe82

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Posted by lizzie217

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before judging people, saying there not happy with there situation, maybe they are trying to make the best out of the situation, or maybe they are truly happy, i know i am.

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I agree. In general this thread bothers me. It is in bad taste to judge others. I sure would not like others to judge me, my life, my decisions. It really is no one's business when or why people decide to have children. I am not trying to cause drama but it irks me that people feel they can just paint all teen mothers with this negative brush.

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No, no...I am not judging ALL teenager young mothers. There are obviously diff. situations to each person, I understand that. But from what Ive seen its just been stupidity...for example..the father of one of these children has a myspace profile and each pic is of him smoking and drinking...(hes 19) and the subtitles all contain curse words (even about his newborn) I am not saying that all young people are like this...just the MANY that I know are..and it upsets me that they do not think about what they are doing.

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I don't think you are judging. I think your just showing frustration with the situation. It is so ironic that there are so many unwanted, unplanned pregnancy, and so many other woman on the other hand who are having fertility problems and want nothing more in the world than a baby. I see it and I just get frustrated too because right now I want nothing more than to start a family, but we just can't afford it right now. So I get where your coming from.

speaking from current experience dealing my 17 yr old sister that is now 6 months pregnant, i must say that yes my sister did do something extremely stupid that could have been prevented. i have been struggling with this situation for the past 6 months because she is 17 and her bf is 16. neither have jobs or are finished with hs (my sis will be done in june though). i KNOW she is not mature enough for a child but i can only hope that it will be a huge wake up call.

luckily my sisters situation is better than most. we come from a very tight-knit family that is very supportive and is going to be there for her and the baby 100%. my mother is making her attend college ASAP as well. of course my concern is that my sister will take advantage and wind up thinking having a kid is a breeze but we'll see.

as far as the father goes, he has been around and been supportive as well as his mom. does that mean he'll always be there? no but my nephew will have alot of other good solid men to look up to.

it is terrible that these girls feel having babies is the best thing that can happen to them without thinking about the well being of the child. all we can do is to continue to educate these teens. not everyones situation will be as good as my sisters but its important to support them even after they make that mistake.

I think they are looking for love and want to be needed and a baby is the answer for most young females. Alot of times these girls are in homes where they don't feel important and want some kind of attention.

Do I think having a baby is the answer, NO, it will just make there lives harder in the future.

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Posted by mrspalomino148

i agree with you to a certain extent, if these girls aren't ready then they should have waited.. but I'm also a little offended by some things said here.. I'm 22, I just turned 21 when I got pregnant ( 3 months after we got married), we own a home, and I'm a sahm, while DH works. We are both still in school, i graduate in may with a BA and DH will graduate with his masters in August.

I dont think its right to bash EVERYONE that is young.. maybe the people you guys have dealt with are idiots, but I know quite a few of my friends, who are my age, have families.

before judging people, saying there not happy with there situation, maybe they are trying to make the best out of the situation, or maybe they are truly happy, i know i am.

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I don't think she was bashing everyone, it was more of people that are immature. Clearly that's not the case for everyone.

dont you know about idiocracy? or whatever they call it that the dumb people outf*ck the smart people its like saying that dumb people keep procreating and eventually their kids will out number our kids - and the world will be full of idiots.....but if you really think about it, its true.....sad but true.....

and i dont think OP meant all young Moms (and IMHO i think that if your age ends in 'teen' you are too young) but anyway, she meant people with no education, no good job, with bum fathers....not a married couple who is financially stable and ready to have a family.....

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Posted by lizzie217

A lot of teenage girls that get pregnant are seeking to fill a void in themselves. Many were abused or grew up in homes with no fathers, and/or little attention from the parent that was around. Often these kids are raised by grandparents, or mother that had them when they were teens etc....

As a Guidance Counselor I work with girls in this situation, it is a hard path that they choose, but they are looking for uncontindional love that they never had. I am not trying to preach I just see things differently working with girls who are going through it.

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I agree with you but that doesn't make it right...I am a middle school teacher and I've seen some of our 8th graders pregnant in our school and I just worry for them and their babies...what makes me feel bad is that they are not giving their babies the best environment to grow up in (what could they possibly offer parentingwise as a teen who isn't fully an adult yet herself?) and that the cycle will most likely repeat itself when these babies are teens. It's a vicious cycle. Many of the girls that have these babies are in poverty too and things become much harder for all when they bring a baby into the picture.