Body Image- Vent. Sorry for writing again.

I feel so stupid for venting about this again...I had been doing so well and am starting to lose it!

So for the past few months (Since February)I have been working with a trainer/nutritionist to put on some muscle. I lost a bunch of weight for our wedding and loved the size I was but hated that I just looked scrawny. SO we decided that I need to put on some weight in muscle for 6 months and then lean out. I have made it very far and have definitely gained and am about ready to scream! I have 5 more weeks left of this 'bulk' (but who's counting right?) and I don't think I can make it! I have found myself skipping meals/snacks because I just want to start getting thinner. (Of course, this doesnt work in fact makes me gain but it's a viscious cycle!)

I know I am so close and i know that once i drop a couple of pounds I will feel so much better but I just can't wait. I hate that my clothes feel tight and that I just look puffy. Today I weighed myself and weighed more than when first started losng weight with this nutritinist a year and a half ago! I wanted to cry...ok I shed a couple of tears and moved on lol.

I know I am not heavy or fat. I am not saying that, I just feel so uncomfortable. I know we all go through this. Does anyone have any advice?

Again, I am sorry for typing this again. In 5 weeks I will not be feeling this way so you wont have to read it anymore! Thanks ladies.

I'm sorry Lauren, I know that you struggle with this and that it's been difficult for you to get to this point. I don't have much advice for you because I scuk at fitness and also have a horrible body image, but I just wanted you to know I read it and I support you.

im sorry...i don't have any advice but just wanted to say hang in there!!

If you are feeling this bad and starting to compromise your eating habits maybe you should consider cutting the bulking up period by 5 weeks. The most important thing to keep in mind is you have to feel good about yourself...If you are crying and do not like the way you look or feel what is the purpose of continuing?
You looked beautiful in you wedding pictures and in the pictures from TWOTY...As long as you maintain a healthy weight it is up to you to decide how you want to look...Do not feel pressured to continue this nutrition/fitness plan if it is making you unhappy.

I used to have serious body image issues, I lost a significant amount of weight and it took me a very long time (years) to accept and appreciate my body.

Things that worked for me were -
not weighing myself - a number on a scale is really meaningless. Of course you gained weight, but you understand how hard it is to gain muscle. Appreciate the work you put into building your muscles.

Also whenever I got down about my body - I made a concsious decision to just pull myself out of the moment and focus on something else. But first I forced myself to tell myself one good thing about my body - If I had a great run, I focused on that, if I did more push ups, I focused on that.

Be proud of your strength and realize that your body is amazingly fit and healthy!

venting like you just did a great start! sometimes you just need to write out what you are feeling and read it back and realize that its just a thought and you can get through it.

I feel the same way about my anxiety. accept you have the issue , vent about it and then distract the brain. press stop in your head and put in a new movie if you will .

first off..dont beat yourself up..we r always here to listen

second..what i would do is dont look at the scale or see how the clothes fit..look at the pics of urself when u think u look scrawny and look at pics of urself now

see the diffrence..see how its muscle..not weight and how hard u have worked to get to where you are

you should be proud of the hard work and effort you put in and know always always how beautiful you are no matter what


love u and always here if u need