DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

What’s a Grouposal? Well, it’s pretty self-explanatory, but I’ll tell you anyway: A deal page is created by a dude in partnership with Groupon and then sent out to his hopeful bride-to-be. She decides if she wants to “Buy”, and well, close the deal. In the case of Greg and Dana, this proved to be a sweet success. Go to the official Groupon deal page here to read all about the adorableness (and trust me, it *is* pretty adorable). Congrats to the newly engaged couple!



The Daily What: Well that’s one way to go about it: A Chicago woman called 911 – to try to get police to scare her boyfriend into proposing to her. Ana Perez, 40, from the city’s Northwest side, claimed her boyfriend was attacking her when she called the emergency number. But when police arrived, she changed her story, admitting she was trying to scare her boyfriend into marrying her. Perez was charged with disorderly conduct. She and her boyfriend have since broken up. As if we needed more proof that crazy stuff goes down in Chi-town, amirite?! KIDDING. I kid.















i interrupt this post to announce the following:

okay i dont find this funny, but i saw this and was like
the one on the left looks like my ex's (she passed about 6 years ago) and the one on the right looks like mine (about 6 years ago, she's mostly white/gray now)

i just saw it and thought.. did i take this picture?

anyway, back to our regular scheduled funnies:











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If you see an attractive girl in a yellow dress it may not be a good idea to approach her by saying: 'Pikachu! I choose you!' She may slap you. #LFMF
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According to Alton Brown, a knife held in the hand in a paring position cannot cut the thumb on the same hand. A few spoonfuls of blood in my sink and four stitches would beg to differ. #LFMF
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When your daughter calls you crying because she has broken up with her boyfriend of 8 years, the correct response is not 'Couldn't you have broken up before I bought him an $80 Christmas present?' #LFMF
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When typing in search results on google, make sure you type everything in the right order. Whale sperm gets you different results than sperm whale. #LFMF
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um... :












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(330):

he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
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(201):

You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a ***** and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
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Today, I found the birthday card that my grandma said she had mailed to me and put 100$ in. Too bad it was in my mom's trash can, opened, with no money. She told my grandma it must have got lost in the mail. FML
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Today, I returned to work after celebrating the New Year in Mexico. I wasn't feeling well, but didn't want to call in sick after already taking a vacation. Now I'm at work with diarrhea, and trotting to the bathroom every 30 minutes. My commute home usually takes around an hour. FML
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Today, I was on a walk when I ran into the woman whose kids I babysit. We had a quick chat, and I noticed she had just blown her driveway clean. As I left, I said 'You did a nice blow job!' FML
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Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. He's been calling his penis 'fun-sized' for a while now, but I didn't know he meant it really was the size of a fun-size candy bar. I'm pretty sure I'm still technically a virgin. FML
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i think there'll be more later...

Re: DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

would it make me sound like a geek if I think one of the Facebook posts is from my friends page... (the dragon one).....

I think DH was part of that conversation

Re: DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

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Posted by eternitybride

would it make me sound like a geek if I think one of the Facebook posts is from my friends page... (the dragon one).....

I think DH was part of that conversation

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ROFL.. i think its hysterical!
if it is, then your friends are awesome! i

Re: DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

anyone catch the 'sodomy' & 'cracked' pun??? lol

Re: DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

Re: DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

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Posted by eternitybride

would it make me sound like a geek if I think one of the Facebook posts is from my friends page... (the dragon one).....

I think DH was part of that conversation

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Nope, that cracked me up!

Re: DAILY FUNNIES 1*6*11

SORRY GIRLS, i didn't have time to get more...
but there's always tomorrow!