Defensive People....

or insecure. or can't take any sort of criticism in general.

i know a few.

What are you trying say exactly?

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Posted by Colette

What are you trying say exactly?

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God youre so defensive!!!

I didnt clarify cause my computer started freezing so I gave up!

This has to do with someone at my job. I called her out on something that was TRUE but in a really nice way cause Im really like the NICEST person on Earth and I was caught off guard with her defensive reaction. So I started thinking about how I know a few defensive people and when they act that way its usually when someone calls them out on their behavior.

Well I think I can honestly say, speaking for defensive people everywhere, that its a combination of both a)knowing the callerouter is right, at least to a partial degree AND b) possessing an acute sensitivity to criticism of any kind, as previously posted.
If you weren't 'right' on some level it wouldn't bother her; but the sensitivity factor is where it crosses into defensiveness - its like an 'allergy' to being corrected, shown up, or proven wrong...

Not that I know anything about this, personally, you understand....

As someone is frequently defensive I can tell you that for me, I just don't like to be proven wrong or called out on things. Yes I know, this is not a good quality and one that I continually try to work on, but I tend to think that I'm always right (even when DEEP DOWN inside I know I might not be, might being the operative word ) and I guess I just think that everyone should just agree with me and not argue. So when they don't agree and push the issue, I get defensive. I could just admit I might be wrong, but I can't and I usually won't, I'd rather fight/argue about it till I wear them out.

As far as being accused of something, that I don't know, I don't really get 'accused' of things, i tend to follow the straight and narrow, but I would imagine it's sort of the same, they know they're busted and can't cop to it.

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Posted by missliss

As someone is frequently defensive I can tell you that for me, I just don't like to be proven wrong or called out on things. Yes I know, this is not a good quality and one that I continually try to work on, but I tend to think that I'm always right (even when DEEP DOWN inside I know I might not be, might being the operative word ) and I guess I just think that everyone should just agree with me and not argue. So when they don't agree and push the issue, I get defensive. I could just admit I might be wrong, but I can't and I usually won't, I'd rather fight/argue about it till I wear them out.

As far as being accused of something, that I don't know, I don't really get 'accused' of things, i tend to follow the straight and narrow, but I would imagine it's sort of the same, they know they're busted and can't cop to it.

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I love that you can admit to that. I, myself, am that way at times but usually only with DH. I feel like sometimes he knows me better than I know myself and that makes me defensive. Thanks for clearing things up for me girls

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Posted by Colette

Well I think I can honestly say, speaking for defensive people everywhere, that its a combination of both a)knowing the callerouter is right, at least to a partial degree AND b) possessing an acute sensitivity to criticism of any kind, as previously posted.
If you weren't 'right' on some level it wouldn't bother her; but the sensitivity factor is where it crosses into defensiveness - its like an 'allergy' to being corrected, shown up, or proven wrong...

Not that I know anything about this, personally, you understand....

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OMG I was like 'what is this big word callerouter' I even pronounced it callerator thinking it was a big word I didnt know. Had to reread that

It also it definitely sensitivity to criticism along with being called out. Great explanation.

I get defensive when people make judgments based on not understanding you or knowing you. A$$uming the worst to me esp when it is not true or peps make things up that are not even close to the situation.
If they are right - I just get upset and think twice and back down. Everyone needs to humble themselves sometimes. It makes for better character.

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Posted by GothBride55

either or guilty, paranoid, or too sensitive.

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STOP talking about me Pish!

I don't like it when people call me out on something that I know already and am trying my hardest to work on.